Am I not feeding DS enough food? Still bf every 3 hours day and night at almost 10 months

[Jellybabie3]

I'm just wondering if I need to do something different..

DS has Bf every 3 hours day and night. Porridge for breakfast although going abit off it atm plus half a banana
Lunch is grapes, a crisp/biscuit thing (baby ones obv) a yoghurt and either some lentil bake/sandwich if he will eat it or similar
Dinner - a portion of whatever we are having so pasta, sweet potato, vegetables.

He wont drink from a sippy cup either

I go back to work in 9 weeks so I am worried he wont be ready to switch to cows milk and food only

Personally, I wouldn’t try to reduce the feeds to get him used to you going to work. It’s going to be so different for him anyway I doubt less feeds in the run up will make much/any difference.

I did this with my first and honestly wish I hadn’t bothered, she didn’t understand why I was saying ‘no’ when I’d always fed on demand, it was so stressful and exhausting trying to distract, offer a cup that got thrown, etc, rather than to just sit and feed.
Also, they often want to feed loads on your days off at first as it’s a big change so it can be nice just to do that rather than trying to limit it. Or when they get sick, etc, you don’t really want to be limiting feeds.

However everyone does what works best for them and some find cutting down feeds is what they want to do. Just don’t feel you have to ‘to get him used to it’.

Good luck going back, it really is so hard trying to decide what to do for the best.

Thank you thats great advice. I think I will just go with it and see what happens.

Distraction/ being busy is the key to cutting down and I would have felt the same about day feeds 3 months ago but now, most days, DS only has one or two and if I'm out without him, he's fine on food/ water/ cow milk
(he's now 13 mo)

Ah ok thanks. I Will try and distract him abit. I have been reluctant to because of the heat but its cooler now for a minute atleast

Do i remember reading he's not great with cups/ water?

As DS has totally got the hang of drinking water recently

But to be honest, DS has just stopped asking so much (he signs now, which is helpful) as he's busy cruising everywhere (and pursuing the dogs mostly)

Now if we could cut it out at night.....................

Lots of babies go through phases of cutting right down and then through phases of wanting more. Often when they become mobile they cut right down and then when the novelty wears off they start asking more. Or going through developmental leaps they can go through phases of wanting more.

Some mums try to offer lots in the day in the hope that it cuts down the night feeds (doesn’t always work but it can be successful).

Remember ‘don’t offer, don’t refuse’ (where you only give milk when they ask) is a weaning technique. Absolutely nothing wrong with this but just some people aren’t aware.

Dont offer dont refuse is a good idea. Just doesnt necessarily work if you need to go out and make sure he has a full tummy. But its defo worth a go the rest of the time.

What should I be aiming for ? Every 4 hours ? 3 ? No idea...

I guess i follow his lead.

Doesn't help hes refusing his breakfast past couple of weeks and he loves porridge. Tried different brands, wheetabix..not bothered. Shame, as this was a guaranteed good meal for him so probably does leave him wanting more milk. Bizarre babies.

Should breakfast be offered before breast?

Personally I didn’t do ‘don’t offer, don’t refuse’ with my second 2 as I didn’t want to wean and I was worried they would start wanting more milk at night to make up for it. Also, like you say if you don’t want them crying for milk in the car/pram on the way out or home.

I don’t think you should be ‘aiming’ for anything. You know him best, I would give him milk when you think he needs it. Distracting them can be so tiring and stressful. Some babies just like to feed little and often. I gave my second 2 milk all the time, even when they didn’t ask. They were both good talkers too but I’d still offer milk the same way as I’d offer a drink or a banana or toast, etc. It can be a great tantrum stopper too so useful as they get older!

If you do wantt to wean, don't offer don’t refuse can be a good starting point but I would wait until you are back at work and settled into the new routine as that will probably change things quite a bit anyway. If you’re not looking to wean then I wouldn’t do it.

Yes, offer food before breast. See the kellymom link above, it explains at that age to offer breast before food as up until one breastmilk should be main source of nutrition and food along side it to help develop muscles for speech, get used to textures, flavours, etc. X

Breast before food that should say! Sorry.

Thank you I did look at the link. I just wondered if DS is still full after morning milk? Its so tricky to know what to do. He woke 3x last night which is fine but abit wearing. Bed at 7, then breastfed at 9.30 1.30 and 3.30 up at 6.30 and fed at 7.

He has 4 teeth on their way so we have nights where that is an issue I know.

Hopefully he will work it out himself

Do you feed lying down? That will help nights be a bit easier.

It’s so hard not to worry and everyone tells you different things which makes it harder!

Even if he is full, he’s full from something really good for him so it doesn’t matter if he doesn’t eat much porridge. Just keep doing what you’re doing, he will eat more when he’s ready.

Have a look at the f/b groups and it will give you an idea of what’s ‘normal’ in terms of feeding/eating/sleeping etc and different things mums do when they go back to work. It can be really reassuring just to have a read. It can vary massively between babies too.

Thanks all ☺

Yeah we get straight up in order to try and avoid the wake up feed. He's not great at breakfast but good at 'second breakfast' after we walk the dogs