Struggling to breastfeed

[SnuggyBuggy]

Long time lurker but first thread.

My baby girl is about 2 weeks old. We had a bit of a difficult start with induction and then her spending a day in NICU (bottle fed) and needing IV antibiotics. I did manage to express colostrum but struggled to breastfeed due to poor latch and nipple pain.

I got help to get her latched better and I feel like we can breastfeed up to a point but sometimes its like the milk stops getting to her fast enough and she becomes frustrated and gets into a cycle of rooting, spitting out the nipple and crying which can go on for hours.

I get scared at night as I eventually become physically exhausted and I'm so worried I will fall asleep and drop her and sometimes during the day I struggle with being stuck in a room all day trying to feed her.

We have resorted to giving some formula just to satisfy her although I'm getting better at expressing so we now have a supply of that too.

I just feel so guilty for not being able to 'hang in there' and that my daughter is so unhappy.

First off is she having plenty of wet and dirty nappies?

Secondly you need to get in touch with an IBCLC trained breastfeeding consultant (an internet search for you area should bring someone up) to come out, observe you feed and check your daughter for tongue tie.

In the meantime, stay in bed with no top on, and your Dd in just a nappy and do lots of skin to skin and just keep feeding. Some babies do need a few weeks to get the hang of breastfeeding, you’re both learning at the minute! Make sure you are drinking tons of water as dehydration can affect supply.

Lastly, there is absolutely nothing wrong with formula feeding if that’s what you want to do. You shouldn’t feel guilty about how you feed your daughter, just as long as she’s fed! Hope things get better for you op. But do get in touch with someone to check for tongue tie.

Good advice from pp.

Adding in to drinking loads of water, when baby drinks you drink! Have a large glass of water at every feed.

Also eat frequently and decent amounts. Oats really help increase supply. E.g. porridge, flapjacks.

I had boxes of flapjacks on the go for months and it helped a lot. I also bought a big insulated cup with straw and kept it with me day and night for sipping.

Kellymom website has so much info it really helped me in the early days.

You may have to do a bit of hunting to find out what's available locally but I got massive useful support from the LLL (La Leche League) breastfeeding support www.laleche.org.uk , NCT breastfeeding counsellors, NHS drop in breastfeeding health visitor lead clinics and local breastfeeding drop in at a community centre. Including loads on the phone

I'm really glad I persisted, it was worth it for us, I saw lots of mums who turned round a difficult start but also I've met lots who didn't get the support they could have done with at the crucial time.

Good luck, keep posting

Teddy is right, OP. You need to access face to face BF support or at least ring the National Breastfeeding Helpline today (open on Bank Hols). Try to stay calm and patient as getting the hang of BF can take time and lots of practice. Sounds like there may be issues with the latch. The vast majority of women have plenty of milk.

Yes tonnes of useful artickes on kellymom kellymom.com/bf/concerns/bfhelp-find/

National breastfeeding helpline 0300 100 0212

Fed is best no matter how that happens. Be kind to yourself. Sometimes people can breast feed sometimes people can't. Sometimes people can express, sometimes they can't and sometimes people bottle feed.
If baby is fed and doing wet and solid nappies then all is great.
However it works out for you, use the great info provided here and in your community services. Then rock it. You got an awesome baby daughter!

Can you nurse lying down? Look up the safer co sleeping guidelines for night feeds - it’s ok to fall asleep as long you are both lying on a firm unobstructed surface with no covers etc to get tangled in. You just drop off and wake up together as needed - I found it really saved us.

Remember that breastfeeding is a lot of supply and demand - you can ramp up supply gradually even if you do spend a while mix feeding. And there’s nothing wrong with mix feeding! Breastfeeding is tiring, it is a challenge for a lot of women and using a mix of formula and breast is completely fine. What’s important is that she’s fed and you’re able to function. Whether that’s on breast, bottle or a mix of the two is not really going to make much difference.

Hi, just to say I was where you are at two weeks in and we mix fed my ds because I was really struggling, and just totally exhausted. I got mastitis and had a bit of a breakdown, and my dh stepped in to feed the baby and let me recover. Ds is 4 months old now, and I'm still mix feeding, and he's thriving, and I'm a lot better too! As pp have said, fed is best, whatever is right for you both. Don't give yourself a hard time, and definitely don't spend these precious early weeks getting stressed and upset about feeding.

I think for the first six weeks I spent most of my time in pj's, in bed or in a nest on the couch, just feeding and cuddling and watching Netflix. At about week six it finally got easier but the first few weeks were brutally hard. Access all the help you can, get as many people as you can to check your latch, and your hold too. I really struggled with cradle hold initially, but switching to rugby ball hold was a lot lot easier, and my ds fed a lot longer that way. And like I said, don't be too hard on yourself, it really is tough.

Keep going OP, if you need to spend the entire day in bed feeding your baby, then that's what you should do. Breastfeeding takes practice (both baby and you!). Lots of good advice on this thread, kellymom website excellent. Good luck

Yes! I also spent entire days (weeks... months even) with my first parked on the sofa watching entire series of stuff.

It does take practice, some women just do it effortlessly and some find it harder. I found it really difficult for the first 2-3 months, it was painful, ds I think was tongue tied, and I put SO much pressure on myself. Then it just sort of got better for nonreal reason. Maybe he’d grown a bit, maybe we’d just got the hang of it. I still don’t know why.

Use a bottle if you need to, go to bed together if you need to. Kellymom is great, hands on support is even better. And don’t feel bad no matter how much or how little breastmilk they’re getting. Fed IS best and having a newborn is hard enough as it is.

Thanks for all the replies, DD is finally having a sleep. Just to confirm she is getting through lots of nappies and has regained her birth weight. I think my overall supply is ok as I am expressing increasing amounts and can see it leaking out when feeding.

I'm going to do some more skin to skin, I have ordered a lightweight summer blanket which I will use instead of a duvet and get someone to check the latch.

I will also practice different holds, I did manage the lying down one at one point yesterday. I'm also hopeful that her getting bigger and more mobile might help, her head seems so small compared to my huge boobs .

If it doesn't work out I will probably stick with a combination of expressed and formula.

Thanks for all the supportive replies, I was at a bit of a low point.