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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Breastfeeding while pregnant / tandem feeding

31 replies

howfaralong · 17/04/2018 19:21

Can we have a thread for those who are breastfeeding older babies or toddlers while pregnant or tandem feeding.

Currently pregnant with a breastfeeding toddler and a bit worried to be honest! Also seem to have developed a bit of a breastfeeding aversion which isn't ideal although google tells me this is common!

OP posts:
Original poster
howfaralong · 17/04/2018 20:23

Hopeful bump

OP posts:
AnUtterIdiot · 17/04/2018 20:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
howfaralong · 17/04/2018 20:35

Oh good idea! I'll ask for it to be moved there maybe. Thanks!

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DinoSn0re · 17/04/2018 20:44

Hi, I’m 33 weeks pregnant and still breastfeeding my 22 month old. I haven’t really read up on anything about tandem feeding (although I probably should!), so I’m also interested in any advice that tandem feeding mums have to offer. I went through the aversion stage, for me it peaked at 28/29 weeks but since 31 weeks it’s been much better.

Original poster
howfaralong · 17/04/2018 21:04

I'm only very early and the aversion has kicked in already. I'm quite upset by it. It feels awful. I almost can't bear it!

OP posts:
Original poster
howfaralong · 17/04/2018 21:04

Also thanks so much for replying and congrats on your pregnancy!

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ByeByeTrain · 17/04/2018 21:09

Hi, I have a 3 week old and a 2 and a half year old who I'm breastfeeding. Still very early days, so I'm definitely not a tandem feeding expert! I have to say I don't really like feeding the two at the same time - I seem to have developed a bit of an aversion to that - so at the moment I feel like I'm feeding one or other of them all the time. I was worried about how my DS would react to sharing, but generally he's been ok - although usually he wants his turn first! It's a bit of a juggling act., but doable!

ByeByeTrain · 17/04/2018 21:11

Oh and in early pregnancy, I found feeding him quite painful, but that got better after a few months.

MyKingdomForBrie · 17/04/2018 21:17

I was worried about this but my toddler actually self weaned when I was about 14/15 weeks. I don’t understand the mechanics of tandem feeding in terms of the milk adaptation - it’s supposed to be totally specialised to the baby and what it needs but how can this be so when there are two babies?

I would have carried on if my toddler had wanted to but she just gradually stopped asking for milk.

TheDogHasEatenIt · 17/04/2018 21:36

I tandem fed for years. Was mostly great, and i'm sure it helped my oldest bond with her sister. My milk had pretty much dried up by the end of my pregnancy and was very painful to do, (to the point that i had to limit my dd to feed only for the count of 10 'cos that was all I could bear), but after i gave birth, there was milk galore and i remember many happy hours feeding them. I'm sure my eldest dd associated the birth of her little sister to mummy having hours to sit around feeding them both on demand.

Original poster
howfaralong · 17/04/2018 21:41

Thanks for all replies.

Yes it confuses me too! I love the idea that colostrum etc protects the newborn and I suppose it worries me slightly that the newborn won't get it and won't get enough milk. Does your body just deal with this? 🤷🏻‍♀️

The aversion is awful. I can tempt toddler through the day with other things but through the night they accept nothing else and I either deal with the horrific feeling of it or don't sleep. I'm struggling.

OP posts:
lizzlebizzle33 · 17/04/2018 21:55

Hi I was 32weeks pregnant when I stopped breastfeeding 18 month old.
I did intend to tandem feed but ds1 seemed to just wean himself off, I assume it was a drop in supply or my milk just tasted different.

I was quite glad in the end as it was getting awkward to feed with the bump in the way and I was super paranoid about him kicking me by accident.

Also I really don't think I could have tandem fed and I'm glad it worked out the way it did, ds2 fed constantly so I was glad to not have a toddler chewing on me too!

BergamotMouse · 18/04/2018 06:40

Hi, I'm currently 10 weeks pregnant and feeding my 21 month old. I'm desperate for her to stop so probably not much help. She's become so demanding and it's all she wants to do alllll day. And I have hyperemesis so really can't cope. I have no idea how to stop it though as she gets very distressed if I say no. The thought of tandem feeding fills me with fear slightly.

curliegirlie · 18/04/2018 08:38

I’m glad I found this thread! Currently 32 weeks, I thought my 2.5 year old had finally self weaned a few weeks back, but she’s back to asking for it at night again now. I must admit I hope she drops it again before the little one comes....it’s quite painful atm, I don’t know whether this is because DD has developed quite a ‘chewy’ latch or breastfeeding aversion, but am not particularly enjoying it!

piglet81 · 18/04/2018 08:44

I've seen magnesium (tablets or spray) recommended for breastfeeding aversion so that might be worth investigating.

Original poster
howfaralong · 18/04/2018 19:19

Thanks for replies!

Magnesium sounds like it would be worth a shot. Can it be taken during pregnancy? I will google! Thank you so much!

It's so hard isn't it? Terrible night last night. Toddler wanted to feed through the night and I could only take it for a minute or two. Lots of tears (from both of us in the end) just awful. It's such a shame as she doesn't know what's going on.

I'm also increasingly disheartened at the advice online about how to wean. I just can't see any of it working for me (I totally admit tiredness might be making me overly negative). It's all about dropping feeds one by one etc. I can easily distract her through the day but it's through the night that's so hard.

ThanksThanksThanks for you all

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curliegirlie · 18/04/2018 21:01

Yeah, it’s all very well saying, ‘will she take a bottle?’. Well yes, she will (and had been mix feed since she was tiny) but she knows what she wants when she wants, and if she wants boob, then a bottle simply won’t do, and I’m too much of a wuss to refuse her. I may regret that soon 😕.

DinoSn0re · 19/04/2018 07:51

My LO has never taken a bottle. I half heartedly tried a couple of times with some expressed milk but she kicked up such a huge fuss it was easier to just keep going. Weaning advice has never worked for us either....maybe I’m too indulgent but I don’t like upsetting her and have always just fed when she’s wanted it. DD is 22 months now and in the past 3 months has started sleeping through, which has made life less tiring! I think being so active during the day really wears her out for a good sleep at night. It does get easier.

DinoSn0re · 19/04/2018 07:55

Also, I have friends who found that BF during pregnancy didn’t help their sickness, or made them feel worse, but for me, the perk was that every time I felt sick, if I just fed DD the nausea would go, so it can go
both ways. I think my aversion stemmed from how sore my nipples were.

Tumama5186 · 19/04/2018 09:36

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
howfaralong · 19/04/2018 18:14

Ohhhh what was the deleted message?!

OP posts:
DinoSn0re · 19/04/2018 19:34

Just some sales/promotional rubbish.

Smellyjo · 19/04/2018 21:11

I'm 19 weeks and dd 27 months self weaned a few weeks ago, my milk seemed to thicken then completely dry up. Boobs are still so lumpy tho but nothing coming out. So this may yet happen for you, although seems less likely when still feeding frequently, we were just once a day usually before that. Have you looked at dr jay Gordon's method for night weaning? Seems quite gentle. Or nurses when the sun shines book? And 'adventures in tandem nursing' sounds good, I've read excerpts from it. Good luck...

scrivette · 19/04/2018 21:23

I was breastfeeding whilst pregnant but DS self weaned at about 20 weeks, he was just over 2 and the feeds were getting shorter and one day he just said 'yuk!' and then didn't want to feed again. To be honest I was quite pleased as I was finding it quite painful.

Pannacott · 19/04/2018 21:59

I tried this for a bit. I had horrible aversion breastfeeding whilst pregnant tooSad

After a while, (and it might have been quite a while?) I realised my breast milk had drastically reduced (around beginning of second trimester?)

So my toddler's insistence at breastfeeding in the night and fussiness with it, was just that she was really thirsty, poor mite. I got her a sippy cup with a one way valve and then she drastically reduced her breastfeeding demands. She still liked to have a go, but there really wasn't any milk do mostly self weaned. I do suggest offering a sippy cup.