Am I breastfeeding too often

[madwoman37573]

DD is one and I'm still bf her 5/6 times a day plus two night feeds. A couple of friends today said they think I'm bf too much now and by the age of one their DC just had a morning and night feed. They suggested it could be because she still isn't eating enough solids. DD has never been a big eater. She does have three meals a day usually something like porridge for breakfast with fruit, pasta or a sandwich with veg for lunch and chicken, sweet potatoes and veg for dinner. I also give her a snack in the afternoon. She rarely finishes what I give her. So I don't understand how to reduce her milk intake.
I have become concerned as I start back at work soon and don't know how she will cope when I'm not there to bf. She won't take it in a bottle or cup.
Just wondered how often your DC bf when they turned 1? Also how they coped when you went back to work? Thanks

I just wondered when and how you bf.. does DD ask for it or are you offering? Also wondered if she's not eating solids too well as she's either too full on breast milk or knows she will have breast milk.

At 12 months DS had a lot less feeds than what you're giving. We gradually reduced when DS improved with eating. I think I was quite a structured breast feeder and stopped feeding at meal times first and then the snacks and then bedtime and in the night came last.

If you're still feeding at meal times I'd suggest you stop here first.

Returning to work is worrying in lots of ways, DD will either eat more when you're not there or take a big feed when you're back.

Does she drink from a cup/ bottle? And will she drink cows milk??

That is still quite frequent feeding for a 1yo, but just 2 feeds a day is quite little IMO. There really is no right or wrong here, just what you're both happy with, and it's far from unusual to have a baby who still feeds frequently at 1.

Feeds will almost certainly reduce naturally when you get back to work so I don't think you have to do anything now, it'll do itself then. If it's driving you crazy now you could try "don't offer, don't refuse", gentle distraction or delay tactics, and slowly pushing back the times of her night feeds a bit to try and get her down to 1 feed.

That is a lot of feeds. For comparison my LO was on morning and night feeds and occasionally a daytime feed at the weekend.

She's probably not eating because she's full of milk.

I don’t think that’s excessive at all op and my one year old dds fed as much as that definitely. If anything it will be a massive continuing boost of immune system protection. Congratulations for getting to this stage!

I let my two self wean and they dropped day feeds with a little gentle encouragement at around 2 and night feeds at 3 which worked very well for us.

I would not worry at all and call the la Leche league helpline if you want more info on what’s standard for bf one year olds.

I did stop bf my dc in front of others at around this age - I don’t feel I should have had to but I was getting unwanted comments so I just popped to the car or if at home upstairs.

Roughly how much is she eating at meals?

This is helpful www.laleche.org.uk/toddlers-and-food/

I would also suggest she isn't eating much because she is full of milk. I stopped breastfeeding a while ago but just for comparison as my daughter is approximately the same age she has 3 cups of cows milk a day, about 4-5oz each time, 3 full meals and two snacks. Can you start offering food before milk during the day and stop doing night feeds? I stopped breastfeeding when my daughter stopped feeding at night and that was around 7 months old. (I know it's difficult because it's a comfort thing too, especially at night. Will she accept a dummy instead?)

I think it's fine if it's working for both of you, but I would be concerned about going back to work and stopping day feeds suddenly. I'm cutting down to morning, evening (loads overnight) and 1 or 2 during the day in the hope I won't end up with mastitis when I go back to work.

No need to introduce a dummy (no benefit to her) or to try to cut down night feeds (no benefit to her).

World Health Organisation recommends to feed to 2 because of the health benefits. Night feeds are not just for comfort.

Thanks everyone. I do always make sure I don't feed her right before or around mealtimes. Normally at least an hour before. I think the don't offer don't refuse is a good idea. I do normally try to do this however think I have got into the habit especially when we are going out of just offering her before we go. Yesterday I didn't and just gave her water in a sippy cup. She ended up getting worked up on the way home.
Yesterday was a fairly good day with food she ate all her porridge that I put mushed up banana in, at lunch she had half her sandwich (so half a piece of bread) a couple of cucumber sticks, dinner 4 sweet potatoes wedges, a handful (her hand) of chicken and peas and half a peach.
She's never had a bottle but will take water from a sippy cup
I have tried to cut down her night feeds by giving her a dummy ( she does have a dummy just at night) but it turns into a full on melt down.
Thanks for the Laleche link reading that it sounds like her eating might be ok. Think I will give them a ring.

My LO is 3 and he feeds at least 3 times a day, more if he falls over or is tired or upset or unwell. Breastmilk is fantastic stuff and the comfort of nursing is so powerful. Let your LO nurse as often as they ask if possible. It's only in the last few months that mine has reduced feeds. Ignore what anyone else thinks and do what you and your baby want.

I think her eating sounds fine from what you’ve listed tbh

All sounds very similar to here! 15 months and I’m doing ‘don’t offer, don’t refuse’ during the day which works fine. Unless I’m trying to encourage a bit of down-time in which case I’ll offer! I went back to work at a year and they coped fine without milk at all most days (sometimes took some in a sippy cup at around 4pm with a breadstick...) although they never had it when I offered before they started. Nursery say that they eat very well which I think is not so secret code for them being gannets. Other children being around definitely encourages them to eat in my experience. And you may find that offering a banana or something (we went through a lot of hot cross buns a few months ago!) stops a screaming fit if you’re on the way home and can’t stop to feed! Hope LLL call is reassuring and going back to work goes well.