Non stop bf at 6 weeks

[user1489931797]

Guys

I'm getting desperate I've turned into an all day buffet and has been this way for the whole 6weeks of his life so far.

there's no clear stops/gaps as people mention the every 1.5/2hrs of feeding for 20mins at a time I'm more like from 3am until 1am for 1 to 2hrs at a time with the occasional 5 min nap the only time you would call sleep happening is for an hour or 2 late afternoon sometimes again at 1am and then again at 8am but certainly not for 16 hours a day more like 5hrs a day broken up.

He won't be put down in his Moses basket I've tried elevating it and warming with a hot water bottle the longest he's lasted in it is about an hour and this has decreased to about 2mins before crying and wanting the boob and we start all over again.

He only falls asleep in our arms he put up with the travel seat sometimes and when take him out in carry cot he cries the whole time.

He doesn't have reflux or colic but when he's awake and not on the boob he gets fussy and cries apart from the occasional 5mins on the changing mat where he's momentarily happy to kick his legs and wave his arms.

There's plenty of wet and dirty nappies and have even tried giving a bottle of formula once a day as a top up to try and keep him fuller for longer he finishes 2/3oz in minutes and straight away wants the boob again.

I didn't want to use a dummy but felt it was needed to be introduced to help him comfiest sleep rather than fall asleep on the boob but he doesn't even care for that tried for 2weeks with it with a couple of different ones and longest he sucks on it has been 5mins and the. Just repeatedly spits it out.

I'm exhausted and aside from weekends can't keep up these crazy sleeping shifts with husband when he's at work meaning I'm lucky to get 1hr 2hr max per day of sleep.

I know everyone says it doesn't last but 6weeks in I'm worried he will never sleep nowhere other than arms!

Help!

The newborn phase and the 6 week growth spurt mean your baby will cluster feed a lot, it's normal and will settle down in a few weeks. For now just relax and feed. Also if you offer a bottle, remember to pace feed

Stop looking at the clock, just go by baby and the wet and dirty nappies. I have a nearly 7 week old and I honestly couldn't tell you how long he goes between feeds or how often they are, sometimes he feeds for 1-2 hours, sometimes for 2 mins, sometimes he'll feed 4 times in an hour and other times he'll go 2 hours, there's no pattern. It's also normal for them to want to sleep on you, I've been absolutely amazed the last two days as this baby has been happy to sleep in his buggy or on the couch for 1 to 2 hours at a time, ds1 never did that at this age!

Try to just go with the flow, it's much easier when you let go of the notion of regimented feeding times and babies sleeping independently so early. Have a read about the fourth trimester too and just enjoy the snuggles while you can

Constant feeding can be a sign of tongue tie. TT is relatively common but is often missed by midwives and HVs because they are not properly trained on it.
www.tongue-tie.org.uk/Mobile/m-tongue-tie-information.html
I suggest you read this info and if you think tongue tie could be an issue, find someone who can do a proper tongue tie assessment (either at a breastfeeding drop-in by finding a lactation consultant near you).

If it’s not tongue tie, getting advice from a breastfeeding drop-in or lactation consultant will still be helpful.

Try to get to a breastfeeding clinic and have someone look at the latch. Often if a latch isnt great it takes longer for baby to get less milk meaning he will be on you for ages and be hungry quickly after a feed. Are you experiencing any pain? Also if you've tried giving formula, increase the amount you give, but no more than a bottle or 2 a day as you need his suckling to increase your milk supply.

Btw it really annoys me that whenever someone posts to say their baby is feeding constantly, people always reply to say “cluster feeding is normal” “growth spurt” and “enjoy the snuggles” (vom)... actually constant feeding is not normal and the OP needs to seek face to face advice from a qualified person to find out whether her baby’s feeding is normal or not.

I agree with PP constant feeding is not normal. Definitely get latch and tongue tie looked at. The first 20mins on either side are effective anything thereafter is due to not stripping the milk effectively or comfort.
Definitely get those things checked out first but then you could try just elongating the gaps between feeds until he gets out of the habit.
Feeding on demand is very popular now which is why a lot of people will tell you otherwise will effect your milk supply. I was told the opposite in hospital and was only allowed to feed my daughter every four hours. I’ve done the same thing with each subsequent baby, for me personally I’d have quit if I had to do it constantly.

Also don’t rule out reflux, please check the symptoms carefully (including silent reflux) and bear in mind it can be worse at night. Baby could possibly have tongue tie and/or reflux. Hopefully not but important to rule out.

Please try and get some expert real life advice. A lactation consultant or a properly qualified breastfeeding counsellor. Ask your HV if they can refer you or if there is a drop in where you can go.

There could be lots of reasons why he is feeding constantly, and lots of things need to be checked and ruled out.

It may be worth getting a sling if you haven't already. He may be more comfortable being in that than a carry cot. Also have you tried feeding lying down? At least that way you can rest a little. If you are able to safely co-sleep then that may also help to increase your total sleep.

You could have been talking about my baby here! I remember my health visitor asking how many feeds he had per day, and I was genuinely bemused; he just had one giant feed throughout the day, maybe stopping for 5 minutes at a time! Anyway, the upshot was, he had tongue tie, so I'd recommend getting it ruled out just in case. Good luck; I hope you get it sorted soon; I remember thinking it would never end!

Thank you so much everyone really appreciate all the advice I'm going to a BF drop in tomorrow for the first time in the morning and also have my HV coming in the afternoon.

I mentioned the constant feeding every HV visit and she hasn't once mentioned TT or silent reflux and doesn't even seem to acknowledge that it seems excessive so will push for deeper discussion rather than just cluster feeding or will get better comments!

This happened with me, and it was that my milk took 7 weeks to decide to come through properly. My baby was screaming with hunger, particularly during the growth spurt period, but because of feeding up to 16 hours a day (awful for me) he was managing to keep a decent weight, though he had breastfeeding jaundice. I was repeatedly told it was a poor latch (despite this it didn't give me any infections). I kept trying to improve the latch, but baby wouldn't have it and would change the latch as soon as he got on. I had been convinced from the start that the milk wasn't coming through properly, but was pooh-poohed at the hospital. My letdown was extremely extremely painful (crying with pain, actually) and when I tried to express virtually nothing came out.

Then at 7 weeks I woke up to find my boobs had grown about 3 sizes and I had spurted milk all over my nightdress. From that day on we had much shorter feeds and my DS's breastfeeding jaundice was gone within 12 hours. Basically, it had taken 7 weeks for my milk to come through properly. My DS's latch never changed.

My diagnosis is that my body wasn't as happy with becoming a mum as my brain was. Baby had been very well positioned for labour but it took having my waters broken, then being induced by every means possible two days later just to get him out. I just wouldn't get contractions. I'm sure something connected was stopping my milk from coming. But the professionals don't know everything, and I'm not sure they're always that experienced or well-qualified. I'm glad I stuck with the bfing anyway; it was well worth it for the convenience, better rest and bonding over the next 18 months. So I hope your experience is more like mine.

I should mention, however, that DS did turn out to have silent reflux and be lactose-intolerant as well, so I don't know how I'd have coped if he'd let me feed him formula at that stage (he didn't).

@namechange cluster feeding in a 6 week old baby IS normal. As long as the baby is gaining weight and has sufficient wet and dirty nappies.

Oh are you a lactation consultant? Have you assessed the OP’s baby’s latch and tongue function?

There is a difference between cluster feeding and constant feeding.

Thanks so much everyone a lot of food for thought

Definitely not TT but potentially slight reflux issue although doesn't look like there's much that can be done for that treatment wise medically/medicine other than winding/ upright after feeding/ raised cot on slant etc which we have been doing.

Just an extremely/ constant windy baby hence being upset when not feeding

But the constant feeding I don't understand he latches on great not got TT and I feel I have plenty of milk coming in, when he is sick has spit up from wind after feeding a sizeable amount comes up and then he's hungry again understandably.

Feeling at a loss with it as husband back to work after xmas and now I'm going to be back to 2hrs sleep a day if I'm lucky 😞

Yes I am a lactation consultant and my training with multiple international organisations has taught me that cluster feeding is normal at this stage (6 weeks). I haven't assessed the baby (obviously) and there may be underlying issues but at this stage the OP is not experiencing any pain or discomfort and the baby appears to be successfully transferring milk with a good nappy output. Cluster feeding can happen when there are feeding issues but it also very commonly happens when there are no issues at all.

OP please feel free to seek real life support where you can verify the qualifications of the person supporting you, La Leche League leaders can be called for free at any time, but please don't worry, your baby's nappy output is vey reassuring. How is baby feeding today?

@Unicornberry thanks so much for your advice!

Well last night he slept the longest spell so far 11pm -3am however in arms so no rest for myself. He fed at 3am for about 30mins then again on and off from 4:30 -6am then again at 8am on and off until 10am and then 11am until 12:30pm he stopped briefly took opportunity to change his nappy again let him kick about and he's now sleeping in my arms but wind/burps have led to him having large amounts of spit up about 4times already but again nappy output seems normal!

I have my HV coming today but I feel with this feeding issue she doesn't offer much help other than things change/won't last but it has been like this for the entire 6weeks of his life so far not just recently.

How was the breastfeeding drop-in?

Unfortunately the vast majority of health visitors are not adequately trained in breastfeeding issues and support. The most helpful thing your HV could do is refer you to a lactation consultant or infant feeding specialist.

@NameChange30 didn't make it out in time but there's baby massage tomorrow which I'm determined to get to and will be enjoyable for both of us and then make sure to get to BF drop in next Tuesday.

Good point about the HV I think it's clear now after a few meets that somethings she's. Great to give clear advise and recommendations and other things can be on the fence or indifferent but definitely going to push on whether can see/refer to a feeding consultant as I can't go on with constant feeding unhappy baby and barely no sleep it's getting me down!

OK so how do you know he doesn’t have tongue tie? Who said so?

I don’t mean to go on about it but I do think it’s impoetant to check with someone qualified just in case. Several people told me my son didn’t have tongue tie but he did. He was gaining weight fine and producing wet and dirty nappies.

@NameChange30 I looked up the TT check list on NHS site and doesn't seem that's his issue but will def mention to the HV about getting it checked out properly as you suggested just to be able to completely rule it out!

Also there should be more than one breastfeeding drop-in, there are often different ones run by different organisations (NHS, LLL, other voluntary groups, sometimes independent lactation consultants). There are several a week where I live (admittedly a city).

Good shout @NameChange30 the hospital only were able to tell me about one but will check to see if there are any independent ones hadn't occurred to me tbh as before giving birth I didn't even know that Bf support groups were a thing!

This sounds difficult but glad to see there was a little bit of respite there last night :)

I'm assuming all is well with his weight and he is thriving.

I agree that this could well be on the normal spectrum....it is hard to see what is really going on, though,.

It seems he is sleeping on his own some of the time, and in arms the rest of the time, and it's this that will add up to somewhat more than the 5 hours in the OP's post. Maybe you can clarify, OP? Has he changed since being a newborn?

You have ruled out tongue tie, so it would be good for someone knowledgable to observe a feed, and see how he attaches. I don't think we can be sure it is normal without a full observation.

Chances are he is fine, though, and just has a very high need to be close and near you/the breast for comfort and reassurance....babies like this are often easier if they are in a sling for much of the time, and it also makes bf more convenient if you can do it while he is in the sling. You can become very expert at this :)

He is still very young, and changing your own life somehow is easier than changing his needs. You do need a chance to rest properly - is there anyone in your circle who would take him for a walk, in the sling, for an hour or so regularly while you have a break?

I'm so sorry to hear you are feeling this way. I know it doesn't seem like it now but it won't last forever. I was similar with my DS although not as bad but he did comfort feed numerous times a day/night. This can be the reality yet a very much hidden fact. One lady in Surestart(do you have these groups, they are amazing) was the same 20+ yrs ago and her local BF group was almost non existent. She got a pat on the back for even bothering to BF and sent on her way by a HV. She rang her sister crying about the demand and was told, if you need to stay at home all day and be a cow then that's what you have to do. This really put it into perspective for me and that I wasn't alone. Everything/one talks about routines and getting sleep when your baby does but it's just not realistic for most of us. Just get out the door asap between feeds then you can feed where ever you are - baby massage was extra feeding time for us but at least most other BF mums were the same and there was tea/biscuits and adult conversation! I hope things improve soon for you.

Ok so the HV came and I spoke to her again about the constant feeding etc she weighed him and in. Nearly 2weeks he'd only put on 4oz and now below the percentile he should be.

It seems for what he needs I'm not producing enough and will now have to do combined feeding as I've definitely got milk coming in but not enough I guess.

Sent me to a Drs appointment with him there and then for full examination but he concurred with HV thoughts

Had to buy cow and gate instead of the aptamil we have tried him with as every time he just throws it back up.

Feeling deflated