about to give up breast feeding - is it the right thing to do?

[makemineaginandtonic]

I have a 1.5 week DD2 and although I really wanted to breast feed I am finding it really hard. DD2 wants to feed at least every hour and is very sleepy so doesn't feed effectively. I've had good advice about how to "wake her up" from breast feeding counsellor, but frankly it all seems too much trouble. DD2 screams the house down every time she is put down after burping and just seems to want to feed all the time. DD1 is wrecking the house every time I sit down to feed and I feel guilty that she is not getting ANY attention from me at all.

I gave up breastfeeding DD1 after six weeks and wish I'd persevered a bit longer, but this time around, with a toddler to look after it is even more difficult to dedicate the time.

Have all the bottles and gear ready to bottlefeed and it is very tempting.

Will I regret it??

Hi - the answer to your question is 'I dunno'

Only you will know if you will regret it - the fact you still wish you had not stopped with your first baby is a big clue which indicates 'yes', though.

There is no guarentee that bottle feeding will change anything - and you will have the feed preparation and bottle washing etc to do as well. It's a bit of a gamble!

What can help mothers in these situations is 'baby wearing' - finding a soft, over-the-shoulder sling that allows you to get on with other things while still giving the comfort and closeness some new babies need a lot of.

It might be worth trying this first before you make a decision. Closeness like this also helps with bf.

It will also help to get the bf counsellor back in again, or at least on the phone. You need support, help and encouragement, and help with your toddler, too.

Its up to you, but the first few weeks are hard, but once you get through the pain barrier it's great
I bf ds1 for six weeks and gave up, but am still feeding ds2 and he;s nearly 3 and it's really nice. I'd give it a bit longer.

It is hard in the 1st few weeks thats for sure, I have 5 kids inc a 15 week old. We are still not plain sailing but what made it easier for me was to set myself a goal. So at the beginning I said I will see how things are at 6 weeks, at 6 weeks I said I would see at 12 weeks, each time I have looked back and realised how it was getting easier. Now I am saying I will see at 6 months!
As time goes you will probably find it easier to breastfeed and have a toddler than to bottle feed. My 3 yr old is testing the boundries and I am able to get up and walk around while b/f which I couldn't do If I was bottle feeding.
Do you have any help at home with the toddler?

Can only repeat what tiktok said, are you sure bottle feeding will be easier. I regretted giving up bf at 6 months last time partly because of all the hassle making up bottles and sterilising etc. This time I'm skipping formula altogether.

Also its normal for them to want to feed every hour in the early weeks, she will soon stretch to longer feeds. See if you can get someone to help with your other daughter.

To make matters worse have just noticed that DD2 has signs of thrush in her mouth, that would explain my sore nipples!

Oh dear sounds as if you are having a rough time .Hope you manage to do what is best for both of you. I ended up doing both as a happy medium !

You have my sympathies, ginandtonic - I had a rough time breastfeeding to start with (bad midwife advice, mastitis, thrush, I could go on...). I just have the one dd, so can't begin to suggest how it is with two to look after, but just wanted to give you my experience of getting rid of the thrush after lots of conflicting advice and prescriptions from doctors. I cut down on sugary foods (inc. very sweet fruit), bread and processed, white-floury things - the idea was to starve out the thrush and it eventually worked.
Good luck, and as my Dad says, whatever decision you make will be the right one for you.

I had similiar problems as you but managed to keep BF until 6 weeks - unfortunately i had to give it up as really poor milk supply - tried lots of things but very little support round here. It is easier to bottlefeed as they are quicker to feed and wind, but on the other hand BF is easier as its on tap, no sterilizing etc - with the sore nipples, i used sheilds which were good and also made sure she was latched on really well - good luck hun!
I really am sad that i couldn't continue BF but have given her the best start possible.

Wow wish I'd known that lizcitral I had a hell of a thrush problem with it recurring. lasted for almost 3 months but stubborn cow that I am I bf for 12 months using the target setting that magnolia used. worked for me.

The only reason I first logged on to Mumsnet was because I was in tears because my DD was feeding all the time, and kept falling asleep as you describe. I was so comforted to see so many mums saying the same thing, and that it was normal, and would pass. A few weeks later and what a difference! My DD feeds for much shorter times, and easily stays awake. It does get better!

I had an absolute nightmare the first 4 weeks with ds, involving breast refusal and mixed feeding, then (sorry, sorry) a couple of further months of 14+ feeds a day (although the bad start contributed to that, I'm sure), but I am so, so incredibly glad we persevered. OK, ds was my first, and I assume it's a lot more difficult with 2. But after a while it does just get so easy. The feeds got shorter a long time before the frequency dropped, but it was just so easy to be out and about with him, he's only been properly ill once (at 19 months, and was better within a day), and I just enjoy it so much.

Haven't cracked yet! Although have to admit I've given her a bottle or two in the night. Just having the break makes it easier to carry on doing the breast feeding during the day. Thanks for all your positive comments, I will try and go for at least six weeks and see how things are going then.

How about the thrush?
Is that under control?
It is often helpful to tell yourself you will do one more day and see how you feel in the morning.

Remember there will always be lots of advice and words of encouragement here on MN for you if you want to keep posting.