Baby refusing to feed during day please help!

[Riversid3]

I have a 4 month old who has been refusing to feed during the day for the past 2 weeks (we're in the third week now). At night time she has 3-4 feeds (11, 2, 4 and 5.30 generally), so this is when she's getting her food. I can usually get her to feed at 7am but it then just gets worse and worse throughout the day, to the point where if I put her anywhere near the breast she becomes hysterical.

I have seen a lactation consultant who said she has a posterior tongue tie. Went to another LC for a second opinion and potentially get it snipped but she thought snipping it would make it worse, so suggested we go to an osteopath. 2 osteopathy sessions later and there is no change, in fact she seems worse. Her latch is very shallow, I have tried the 'flipple' technique and she does latch on better but will still pull off after 30 seconds as if she's in pain. I have tried laid back bfeeding but she just gets frantic and can't latch on properly that way. I have also cut out dairy since last week to see if that helps (but wouldn't see a change from that yet).

I just don't know what to do now. She won't take a bottle so can't 'top her up' that way, and it is making our bfeeding relationship really stressful. When she feeds during the day she has 30secs-1 minute then pulls off screaming. I then can't get her back on to the breast. I don't understand why she is fine feeding at night but seems to find it distressing during the day. I've tried feeding her more often, less often, very short frequent feeds, but nothing has made any difference.

It's getting to the point where I am dreading feeding her and it's making me (and her!) really miserable. I feel like I'm failing to feed her properly and am so tired from waking up all night. If she would take a bottle I would've stopped bfeeding her by now. I also have an older DD so just hunkering down and getting on with isn't an option.

I'd be really grateful if anyone has any advice or has experienced this? I can't see an end in sight at the moment and it's having a huge negative effect. Thanks in advance x

@Skywalker51 thank you so much we’ve just started the omeprazole so hopefully it helps. I’m EBF but desperately trying to get an expressed bottle of milk down his gob to give myself a break from the feeds!
@jpeg32 I’m so glad things worked out for you and you’ve given me a little glimmer of hope which is really what I need right now.
It’s so tough esp when you see other Mums just casually bfing with no problems. So hard not to feel like I’m doing something wrong.
Have a great Christmas I’ll update this post in the NY for other mums with my experiences.

Hi @Riversid3
I was wondering how your little one progressed after this.
My DD has been the same way pretty much since she was born. She’s fussy during the day, and only feeds for a few minutes if that. Then during the night she will wake up three or four times for a full feed ( 15-20mins).
I’ve tried to stall her night feeds to try and shift the good feeds to say time, but it’s not worked.
I wondered if your little one ended up improving at any point? I’m considering getting my DD on solids soon because I’m not convinced she’s getting enough calories.
Have also tried her on bottle with BM and formula and she won’t have either.
Know this original post was a while ago, so Im super keen to find out what your 4/5 year old is like now

See this www.laleche.org.uk/what-happens-at-four-months/

When I went to lactation consultant about this problem she said it was strong/fast flow in the day causing baby discomfort and windiness - boobs produce milk more slowly at night, hence calmer feeding. This always confused me because my boobs felt fuller at night and I assumed they’d shoot out more accordingly!

So I stopped pumping (was doing this to fill an evening bottle forDH to give) which was stimulating my boobs to make too much milk. I also block fed - so use one boob for 2-3 feeds in a row, so that for the later feeds it would be emptier and slower. After a few days my LB seemed better feeding in the day. Could have just grown out of it, but it was a heck of a timing coincidence.

Consultant also stressed the importance of trying to stay calm, as an anxiety to feed can trigger boobs to gush as well.

I know this is an old thread but my 15 week old son has stopped eating in the day completely bottle and breast and only feeds when sleeping or at night. Any advice? Think he has silent reflux but can't get the gaviscon in him as he won't take a bottle let alone the 4oz it needs

Hi bexyo, sorry this is happening. Can you speak to a health visitor/helpline? The lactation consultants are amazing if you are trying to breastfeed and can get to a breastfeeding support group. It might be caused by what wobblehead says above? As long as he is taking in enough when he does feed I don’t think it matters too much if he doesn’t feed in the day but you should check with a professional. It will pass/change eventually. Good luck - it’s so hard when it’s happening but it does change.

Hi @bexyo I'm really sorry you’re going through this! I’m now pregnant with my second and so scared this might happen again because it was such a difficult period for us.

The cause for us was silent reflux, but it took a long time to work that out and find the appropriate remedy. Once we discovered the underlying root cause of the reflux was allergies (nuts, sesame, egg and fish) and I removed those things from my diet (my son was bf), we were then on a proper dose of omeprazole for a short while and things changed dramatically within 2 weeks. So for us it was reflux but caused by allergies, all of which needed attention!

It took me 6 months to get any answers and they were the hardest and longest months of my life. It’s really stressful! Keep pushing your GP for a referral to a paediatrician - this is how we got some help.

Hopefully everything works out for you.