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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

DESPERATE- no luck from breast to bottle

32 replies

maisiebabe · 06/02/2007 18:07

My DD is 14 weeks old and I'm going back to work in 4 weeks. I need to get her onto a bottle and into a routine so that she can go to nursery. I have tried all bottles, teats, cups known to man and beast but to no avail....so, having talked to a couple of other mums and the HV who is being v supportive, I am now with holding the boob, the theory being that she'll get so hungry that she'll take a bottle (tommee tippee closer to nature). She last breastfed at 4am today and has taken about 2 oz all day. She's not screaming all the time but cries when a bottle goes near her- I got tiny bits of EBM in when she was dozing. It's hellish and I feel like s**t- does anyone else have any experience with this? How long do I let her go without breastfeeding, and if I do, then surely I'll be back to square one? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGh!!!!!!

OP posts:
Scootergirl · 06/02/2007 18:08

Can someone else try the bottle for you? If she's thinks there's any chance of bf from you, she'll be having none of the bottle if she's anything like mine were!

taylormama · 06/02/2007 18:09

if she can smell breastmilk on you then she won't accept a bottle - when i switched i got DH to offer a bottle and i left the room.

taylormama · 06/02/2007 18:09

if she can smell breastmilk on you then she won't accept a bottle - when i switched i got DH to offer a bottle and i left the room.

Original poster
maisiebabe · 06/02/2007 18:12

Yes, DH, uncle, HV have all tried. It's a nightmare. I'm currently wearing DH's jumper to disguise the smell of milk. I feel like rying every time I look at her and she's quite smiley at the moment which makes the guilt worse.....

OP posts:
Scootergirl · 06/02/2007 18:18

We took DD to a bowling alley (strange but true) and she was so busy gawping at everything going on that she kind of took the bottle without even noticing!

JodieG1 · 06/02/2007 18:34

From what I've read it's not good to try and force a bottle or withhold the boob. The Nct book I have on breastfeeding says to try a few times with the bottle and then then stop. Also, to try when baby isn't very hungry but is happy and it's more likely to work. I've also read that some babies just hold out for mum to get back from work and then make up for the breast feeds in the evening.

Original poster
maisiebabe · 06/02/2007 18:45

I know- I heard that too and at the moment I'm having no luck with boob cold turkey. But I've tried the bottle when she's happy/ hungry/ full/ sleepy/ awake and this really is the last resort. I'm running out of time and I don't know if it will 'just happen' as other people have said it will. I can't leave her at a nursery for a full day knowing she won't eat -will a nursery take her like that??

OP posts:
Scootergirl · 06/02/2007 18:49

It's so horrible isn't it? I handed a starving (so I thought!) DD over to my mother then went for a walk, tears streaming down my face, convinced I was mistreating her horribly. Needless to say, all was well and she took the bottle eventually.

LIZS · 06/02/2007 18:49

I also don;t think that a 14wk old shodul go that long with so little . By all means try a little from a bottle at the start of a feed but she may not take much to begin with and being overhungry will make her even less likely to do so happily . Could you try - no pressure - for a few minutes at the feeds you'll need her to be bottle fed then b'feed her whatever the outcome and at the tiems you'll be with her . Once she starts to take the bottle, you could gradually increase the amount in the bottle relative to the actual breastfeed.

eviletc · 06/02/2007 18:59

would the nursery feed her from a cup? have you had any luck with one?
much sympathy for you

mears · 06/02/2007 19:00

maisiebabe - please do not go cold turkey any longer - all you will get is a distressed baby who will refuse bottles altogether. Breastfeed her as normal just now. Let her get over the trauma of today then try again in a few days time. Nurseroes are used to babies needing emcouraged to take bottles. She will not starve. When I went back to work I tried a bottle a couple of days before. I started breastfeeding and when DS was in full flow i slipped him off and slid the bottle in. Make sure the milk is warm and also heating the teat can help.
Another trick that I have found works is walking around holding the baby facing away from you. They quite often suck then as they are distracted looking around.
No breast fed baby has every starved when mum goes back to work - 4 weeks is a long time in a baby's life - she will behave differently then.

hunkermunker · 06/02/2007 19:03

Agree totally with everything Mears has said. Give both of you a break and bfeed her. It is hard. I did as Mears did with the sneaky bottle in baby mouth when in full bf flow. Worked a treat after a few goes.

Original poster
maisiebabe · 06/02/2007 19:13

Heeeellllooo, its the dh! DD is 2/3 way through a 5fl oz bottle as i type!!

OP posts:
Original poster
maisiebabe · 06/02/2007 19:32

Was about to BF as suggested then she took 5 oz while quite sleepy and is now asleep. Although I wanted her to take a bottle, I could have wept while she was sucking as I feel I've broken her will and betrayed her trust. What a s** day.

Can I combine BF and a bottle as I love the BF bond? Should I bottle feed when she wakes in the night? and the HV suggested bottle feeding for the next couple of days to get her used to it before BF again? So many questions... thanks all for your advice and support, much appreciated on my first time on mumsnet....

OP posts:
funnypeculiar · 06/02/2007 19:39

won't give advice as there are other much more qualified to do so - but just to say well done maisiebabe, maisiebabe's dh and maisiebabe's baby {smile} - dd was a nightmare with moving to bottles and it was soooo tough!

LIZS · 06/02/2007 19:46

Sorry I think HV is wrong. You now know she can do it , so I'd still go with breast feeding at night and when you will be able to do so regularly and gently trying bottle again at the daytime feeds tomorrow but being prepared to "top up" yourself for the time being until she is more used to it. If you mess around without expressing at the feeds you can sustain while working you could create problems with your supply and feel even worse.

Original poster
maisiebabe · 06/02/2007 20:47

Think will try a bottle at the 10.30 pm feed, BF when she wakes at night, then DH can try a bottle tomorrow for the first feed. When she took the bottle at 7 pm, she was half asleep and maybe didn't know what she was doing....but I know where you are coming from Lizs, and don't want to confuse her. I'm confused myself as to what to do for the best.....

Although today has been really traumatic I don't want to lose the bottle momentum and have to go through this all again.

OP posts:
determination · 06/02/2007 20:58

Have you tried using a Large feeding syringe - (free from any chemist)? or possibly the Haberman Feeder?

bubblejet · 06/02/2007 20:59

Really feel for you on this one. My first was totally happy with mix feeds from about 8 weeks so it through me when my second didn't want a bottle. She was happier at 10.30 feed as it was more of a dream feed so I agree it probably helped that your little one was sleepy. Agree too with the comment about holding her facing away from you, this is the only way my little one will take a bottle. After 2 days of fighting she would take them in the day but then refused to breastfeed...I also had to drop her right down to the slowest teat - again complete opposite of first. Good luck - it will get better and don't feel bad.

pistachio · 06/02/2007 21:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
maisiebabe · 06/02/2007 21:08

Fingers crossed for bottle, but just in case...what are doidy cups and haberman feeders and where do you get them if need be?

If anyone's interested, I have a vast selection of once used bottles, cups and teats!! including the raved about breast flow bottles. These companies must make a fortune from desperate BF mothers....

OP posts:
determination · 06/02/2007 21:13

You can get the Haberman from www.breastfeedingheaven.co.uk along with just about everything else a BFing mum could wish for!

determination · 06/02/2007 21:24

Just wondering what is a doidy cup? Could someone post a link to where they can be bought? im curious as never heard of them b4...

mears · 06/02/2007 21:53

maisiebabe - glad she finally took it for you. As someone has already said, at least you know she can do it. For your own peace of mind you could give her another feed tomorrow - possibly at the same time. I don't agree with your HV that she should have bottles only for a few days. When I went back to work I only gave a bottle for missed feeds. On my days off i didn't give a bottle at all.
Yes you can combine breast feeding with work. Are you going back full time or part time? What hours will you be working?
You need to be organised and have a stock of EBM in the freezer before you go back. Are you planning to express or use formula? It is possible to exclusively breastfeed and work full time - depends what you want to do really.

katzg · 06/02/2007 21:55

i have a haberman feeder kicking around somewhere which my dd rejected after 1 attempt! your welcome to it if you want CAT me