How long does it take to get the hang of breastfeeding?

[Cinnamon84]

I gave birth to my lovely ds exactly a week ago, I managed to get him latched on quite painfully after the birth and then a couple of times at home until I realised it was hurting too much and felt wrong. There is an excellent bf clinic I've been doing to every day and when I've got experts helping me latch him on I manage to have a successful feed while I'm there.
To give my sore nipples a break I've been expressing milk and cup feeding (which is a massive faff and about a quarter of it ends up being spilt) and topping up with formula, and his weight has dropped 7.7%- I thought that was in the normal range but mw wants to keep an eye on us now which makes me feel s bit crap.

I'm really really keen to crack this but everytime j attempt to feed him by myself at home it I end up not doing it properly and hurting and feel like I haven't made any progress. I'm anxious at the fact that dp goes back to work a week tomorrow and I'll have to express and cup feed by myself.

I really didn't expect it to be so difficult! How long should it take to get the hang of this? When does it get easier?!

I used Moo Goo's nipple balm which really helped. The nipples have to toughen up a bit I think. My Mum said it would take about three weeks before I could be peeled of the ceiling and she was right!

moogooskincare.co.uk/baby-range/mudder-udder-balm.html

I mainly persevered through the pain...and yes at times it was really excruciating.

I did use nipple shells to stop my poor mashed up nipples touching my clothes and lanisoh to help them stay moist while healing as when they scab over it feels even more painful! I also paid privately for a Lactation consultant which was money well spent!

In my opinion if you are really committed to EBF, if you persevere through the pain you'll get there.

I had a good two weeks of almost excruciating pain on latching on, but it subsided once he got going. Tbh I think the 'it shouldn't hurt' mantra is a bit of a myth. Nipple are pretty sensitive and a baby's latch is strong so to me it's no surprise that it would hurt to start with. I didn't have any cracks or visible problems, but ds did feed constantly for weeks. Less than an hour between feeds.

Hope things improve soon.

Sorry you're having a tough time.

I had such a difficult time to start with but am so glad I persevered.

For me it took a few weeks to be able to consistently get my baby to latch (we had tongue tie diagnosed and snipped in that time). During that time we did BF and also expressing and bottle feeding and finger feeding (under guidance from a lactation consultant).

So I reckon things a lot better after about a month and I had some pain up until about three months I think and used lansinoh for a lot of that time.. Then it just stopped hurting so much I think.. And feeds got shorter and more efficient etc.

I would recommend you get a private lactation consultant (IBLC) to take a look if you can afford it. Also make sure the person who said no tongue tie is actually trained to diagnose it as it can be easily missed if you're not properly trained.

It is so worth persevering with if you can bear it.. Expressing and bottle feeding seems easier now but in the long run will be more of a faff.

I know what you're saying about your current experience interfering with you bonding with your baby as I felt the same way.. But after the initial stressful few weeks things got so much better and my bond with my baby just kept growing.

I know it's tough and emotional and feels
never ending but it can get so much better if you access the right support good luck.

Thanks for your responses, I'm very close to giving up on bfing- I can't seem to get him to latch onto one side now (the side that seems to produce more milk)- when I eventually get him on he has one suck and then comes off again. On the other side I get the letdown feeling and then minutes after I feel like he's really chomping on my nipple or flicking it hard with his tongue or gum. The bf clinic were helpful to start but last time I went basically said the latch was fine and that I was going there too much, so not really sure who can help now. Everytime I try feeding we both end up getting frustrated, I end up crying and I feel sad that I'm really not enjoying these early days as every feed makes me anxious. Dp goes back to work on Tuesday and I'm dreading it, I haven't even got the hang of the bottle- it's a medela calma one which is supposed to mimic sucking a breast, I can't even do that right and I'm feeling like such a failure

Cinnamon, what a difficult start :(

It's no help to say latch is fine, when it is clearly presenting difficulties for your baby.

One to one help could be the next best step for you. Any of the BF helplines, or someone local you already know about.....that could make a difference.

I recognise so much of what you're saying. With DS it took 8 weeks (the longest of my life!) until I could finally feed pain free.
The issue was that we started off with a bad latch the first week or so, and my nipples were seriously cracked and bleeding etc. After two weeks, the latch was good (he was older and I had learned how to do it). But I also had relatively low supply to begin with, so my baby was basically attached to my boob for hours every day and night. As a result my nipples never really got a chance to heal. So for the next 6 weeks, every feed felt like someone squashing broken class inside my boob. I hated feeding, it was so scary every time.
But it did get better, very slowly. One boob first, then the other. I managed to increase my supply by taking fenugreek, which made his feeds more satisfying and shorter, and as a result my breasts were getting a break.

Lansinoh was a godsend. I also spend as much time as possible exposing my nipples to air so they could heal.

It would be totally understandable if you decided to stop breastfeeding, but be assured that you are not the only one facing these issues. It does not mean that you are a failure; in the contrary, you are being so strong for keeping at it these last couple of weeks.

Please feel free to PM if you want to chat about it or need more advise/someone to listen.

I also found it excruciating to start and took me 12 weeks to get the hang of it with dd1. I persevered through sheer stubborn-Ness and tried shields, used loads of lansinoh and used to rub breast milk on my nips too as well as attend bf support groups. After 12 weeks it was really easy and I was glad I persisted. The HVs were telling me she wasn't gaining weight (thogh was along 25th then dropped to 9th centile but continued along this so was actually fine). But after 12 weeks became easy and continued till 8 months! With dd2 I was really lucky and it was only painful for about 2 weeks. A friend of mine who was equally stubborn continued for 10 weeks but her baby dropped massively down centile lines and looked like a scraggly alien before she realised ff was the way to go and she was much happier.

What I'm saying is being stubborn is good as long as the baby has not dropped more than 2 centile lines (eg from 25th to below 2nd) and it'll be easy eventually but if the baby has dropped more than 2 centile lines it'd be worth thinking about mix or ff. Otherwise the pain will pass!

Forgot to say friend got double mastitis while.feeding too poor thing

Thanks everyone for the advice and support! I saw a private lactation consultant today who has diagnosed posterior tongue tie (I should have trusted my instincts and gone private days ago but I was recommended this person specifically today) and she is coming back to our house tomorrow to snip it. Bit scared for ds and not pinning all of our hopes on this but would be great if this improves the situation

Fingers crossed for you both.

Ah fingers crossed for you.
I had a fucking awful 6 weeks. I used to dread the cluster feeds and beg DH to take her just for a few minutes because it was agonising. I used to take 2 paracetamol at about 6pm and all evening I would be swapping DD over and the non feeding boob would be slathered in lansinoh and have a heat therapy pad on too.
DD had tongue tie too, which we only found out about at 6 weeks.
I had it snipped at 6 weeks and the same night was better and slowly improved to no pain at all.
We managed to feed for 17 months.

I really hope it helps you, but if you decide to switch to FF then you have done an amazing job getting this far.
If you want more help have you got a local La Leche group? The have plenty of local fb forums and real meet ups too.
Have you looked through Kellymom? It's an excellent website with loads of resources.

Good luck OP

Heat therapy pads

I should add that I found the snip slightly unsettling and couldn't watch them do it but am usually very hardy and non squeamish.
DD cried when doc's glove was in her mouth but the minute he'd done it and I sat her up and cuddled her she was fine, tried a quick feed and she was fine. No more tears!

Fingers crossed for you!

I haven't read the thread but for me it was breast shells (not nipple guards) that got me through this time. When my nipples were sore I found that lasting lanisoh on them rather than air drying them, maybe with breast milk on them, helped. If it is tongue tie then snipping it will make an immense difference. I'm all nostalgic looking at tiktok posting. I'm sure she still posts all the time, but I have a few glasses of wine on me and it brings me back to the time when my LO was that age and I dropped the phone on her whilst mn'ing