Advice on stopping bf. Dd2 is nearly 1, I'm back at work but when I tried to give up bf at Xmas I was sooo depressed and teary - but I have decided that I do want to stop.

[hotmama]

I was so determined to make more of a success with bf dd2 ( I lasted 10 weeks with dd1 and always 'beat' myself up about it).

So I was determined to get to 6 months exclusively bf dd2 - which I did! DD2 is one in 2 weeks - and I'm still bf - it kinda just happened as it was so easy and I knew I was doing the best for dd2.

I went back to work at the beginning of Jan so tried to wean off the bf - dd2 only bf's am and pm anyway. However, I got really teary and sad so packed in trying to stop - but I now I feel I want to stop. Partly for selfish reasons - I want to sort my body out and feel unsure of the effects on bm if I diet. I have tried to lose weight whilst bf - it just doesn't happen!

I also want dp to be able to help a bit more so I can for example go for a run at night and he can feed dd2 etc.

At the moment, I feel I have no time for myself and not enough hours in the day to do everything. Myself and dp have 2 full-on careers and I feel like I am running around like a headless chicken trying to get everything done etc - I need more time and I think that stopping bf will give me some more time.

I don't want to express bm to give dp to give dd2 - I feel the time is right to stop.

Also, I'm 40 at the end of March and am away for 4 days - so I need to have stopped bf by then and dd2 to be happy as my mum is going to be looking after the dd's.

So I would like advice re stopping and trying to minimise the emotional downer that I had - or is it just something I have to go through.

Also, is it best to give up the am or bm feed first - how long should I wait before I give up the remaining feed completely?

I really could do with some advice so please help.

bump

Thanks for this.

How were your breasts when you did cold turkey? I'm hoping as I only bf twice a day anyway that I shouldn't have engorgement problems - what do you think?

Any more contributions?

bump for some helpful advice from the evening crew?

I just stopped (DD is 7.5mo). I had been feeding her in the morning and then a small feed at 10:30. Then I expressed in the afternoon to produce her bedtime feed.

I was very engorged 2 days after stopping and it did hurt - it was even hard to pick DD up. I ended up expressing a tiny amount from each breast (e.g. half an ounce) to take the edge off and taking a load of paracetomol.
I posted on here and one person suggested eating lots of sage to dry up my milk. I didn't have time to get any, but it's a good idea. It's now 4 days since I stopped and I am pretty much back to normal.

Right - I've gone for it.

I'm thinking that milk supply reduces in the evening - that's why it's easier to express in the morning rather than the evening?

So I didn't give dd2 an evening bf - she had a huge bottle so hopefully will go through until morning as giving a bf during the night slightly negates the process!

Will see how I am in the morning - may have norks of steel!

I always expressed Bm in the morning, they had topped up over night so it was easy.

I knocked feeds off in stages while I was weaning DS. Your at my final stages. I knocked the morning feed off when he could have cereal. It was the night time 'mummydummy' that was the hardest to stop. I offered a training cup of milk before his story and left his room. He cried a couple of times and I wouls pick him up, cuddle him but not offer a feed (that was hard as it was my 1st reaction - crying baby, offer breast) Soothe, cuddle and settle back to bed.

Within a week he'd stopped feeding completly.

Best Of luck with it

I just made sure that there was no long snuggles at key feeding times (like you,was down to twice a day).

If you can tail it off a bit before gonig on your 4 day trip away it will probably come to a natural stress free conclusion for all.

My DC's are now way past this but they both BF til almost 2 - just bedtime and morning past about 9 months. I started thinking about getting them off when HV told me they 'habit form' past 2 and it would be easier before. I did it by feeding at morning/night every other one (but alternating if that makes sense? They went to one BF a day but not at the same time as the previous?!) and then to skipping two days and then three then I forgot to feed them and it was done. No swelling or engorgement or trauma...for them, anyway. I loved BF.

hotmama - I'm so glad you made it to the point where giving up was a choice.

How did it go?

FWIW, I just stopped with the dds and had no problems that I can remember.

Thanks a lot for all of your posts.

I'm now just feeding in the morning - but not sure how long I will continue. Yesterday, they just felt like empty bags and I didn't feel any let down - but dd2 quite happily suckled - so I assume there was something there or she would have moaned?

Today was more positive (still felt like empty bags) but did feel letdown - so I must still have milk at the moment!

Dd2 is 1 on the 10th Feb - so hopefully will continue to bf until then - and then give myself a big pat on the pack for getting to a year!

Am giving dd2 lots of special cuddles - as this is one of the best things about bf!

So hopefully she will be fine when I go away.

Thanks again for your advice. x