BFing a huge newborn and it's all going to hell

[LordTurner]

Hi

I was hoping someone might have some advice or encouragement for me as I'm reaching the end of what I can bear. My son is nearly 2 weeks old and was born weighing just under 11lbs. I've been trying my best to BF him but the last two weeks (more the last 10 days since my milk came in) have been utter hell.

His latch seems to be perfect but it is too sore to bear when he latches on and throughout the feed it is uncomfortable. I've been using nipple shields which have got me this far but I'm worried they are affecting my supply as I seem to be producing less and less, DS will spend hours feeding but will not settle without a top up from a bottle so he is obviously not full from the breast. Near the beginning I could feed and express a decent amount but the last few times I've expressed its been pitiful - less than 1oz even when my boobs seemed 'full' beforehand. We both have thrush and I have mastitis which we are being treated for but my chest feels like it is on fire constantly. I'm in tears all the time and we can't leave the house or do anything because he's stuck to me all day or I'm too sore to wear clothes, I'm going stir crazy.

I've seen a breastfeeding consultant and she was lovely and supportive but not really a fan of the nipple shields. I really can't feed without them though, my nipples are broken and bleeding and it is only with the shields that they are slowly healing.

I want to give up BF but I love feeding DS and I will feel like I've failed. Help! I'm completely losing it.

It goes without saying of course that you've done brilliantly and it's okay to stop. Ignore the rest of my post if that's what you need to hear.

If you're hanging onto some stubborn desire this is what I'd ask:

How have the HCPs checked for tongue tie? It's fairly common for HCPs not to be trained in spotting it. Also I remember a MN thread where people reported an average of 7 HCPs declaring that their baby didn't have one when they did. I agree that you should try to find an IBCLC if you can, was the consultant you saw accredited?

Use the nipple shields if you need them. You can wean off them later, there's no rush.

Do you have Lansinoh? That was great for me in terms of healing. I've also heard great things about the silver shields - you can't feed with them on but they are for between feeds.

WRT pumping, 1oz is actually quite a normal amount. There are tips in there or linked from there on how to increase supply. Also look up recipes for "nursing cookies" and get someone to make some for you.

I feel for you - my nearly 10lber and I had an emergency section and the first six weeks were agony. If you do want to continue (I felt the same as you) the top ups will be causing problems with your supply, I'm afraid.

Dangle feeding and hot compresses can really help with the blockages - as can really emptying the boob properly, so the formula may not be doing you any favours there either.

If you do want to persist - and at 12 weeks I'm pain free and so happy I did! He's thriving, too - it can get better, even if it doesn't feel like it right now. I can recommend an amazing LC in the SW, too.

BTW I still don't pump anything other than dismally small amounts - it's really not a direct comparison!

Wow, more amazing replies thank you everyone! We had a rough night (awake 1am - 5.30am BFing, fussing, puking, BFing...) but have also had a couple of good feeds. I've set myself the goal of getting through this week to next Saturday and reassessing the situation then.

I'm still dubious about the tongue tie, as he has never stuck his tongue out beyond his lips. I'll ask the LC to take a look. I have access to an NHS one and an NCT one so I'll make the most of them.

At the end of the day I have an amazing little boy and regardless of how he is fed I'm so proud of him I could burst.

Thanks all

I feel for you! I'm going through the exact same right now! I fed my first dd with nipple Shields until she was five months old! She took them off herself and then fed without them.

There was no other way I could feed dd. My nipples were too flat and I think dd had a petite mouth. I remember one midwife suggesting I pump and another saying I should stick to nipple Shields as it's the closest to real breastfeeding that me and my dd could achieve.

DD2 is two weeks old now and can latch on but it's still really painful! Hence why tonight I turned to the nipple Shields after a day of pretty much constant feeding.

Think you have to do what's best for you and baby.

How are you getting on, OP?