Working or not, your DH needs to do some of the feeds each night. You also have a job - caring for baby - and cannot do that on no sleep. There's no reason at all why one of you merits full nights of sleep and the other should just go without. Work out a schedule which gives both of you a decent stint of sleep.
If baby is still going 3 hrs plus without feeding during the day, I'd wake and offer milk at shorter intervals. I wouldn't let her have a 4 hr sleep stint during the day at all. According to my midwive, that's normally the maximum time a little baby can sleep for and they will only do it once in a 24 hour period, so it should be at night.
I think you need to jiggle around with her routine so she gets day and night worked out, but that will take a bit of time to establish. Waking and feeding more often in the day and comforting rather than immediately feeding at night, but incrementally at night.
I had a similar thing with my DS. I just wrote off nights for a while, so when comforting I basically didn't expect it to get him back to sleep at first. So, if waking after 1.5 hrs I'd not feed until 2 hrs had passed, then when he started waking after 2 hrs, I'd go for 2.5 hrs then 3. I'd hold/rock etc until it got to the appointed time. I fed lots during the day to make sure he got plenty.
It's a bit different because my son was bf and was using it as a crutch to sleep, but sucking a bottle can also be a crutch. He was also a little older as this mainly happened during the 4 month sleep regression, so I'd check with hv about your tactics! It does sound very much like your baby needs her day/night radar resetting.