how to stop BF

[LittleMissPear]

My DS is 14 months. He's finally sleeping through and finally started taking cows milk during the day (although he sometimes has a sneaky bf in the afternoons on the days I'm not working) he loves bf-ing. Loves it. I am very ready to stop though. He completely associates breastfeeding with sleep and I do every bedtime as he always has a bf before bed, quite often feeds to sleep although not always. How do I stop? I've tried giving a beaker of milk but he cries and pushes it away. Would it work to give him milk before his bath and then just do a story and put him straight in his cot? He'll cry loads but I could try? Thanks!

Bump

I wonder if your question is more of a sleep one. The bf before sleep is now a sleep prop. This isn't a bad thing if you are happy to continue. If not you need to break the association and help dc to self settle. This is the tricky part and it depends on what you feel comfortable with. You could replace it with another sleep prop such as rocking to sleep (cons of this is that you may then need to wean them off that and doesn't teach to self settle). You could try the no cry sleep solution (google this - author is Elizabeth Pantley). This will take several weeks but is more gentle. Or you could teach dc to self settle through controlled crying. Cons of this is that there will be crying! Pros are that it works fast when done properly.

I would keep in the breastfeeds if you decide to help dc to self settle (which ever method you choose) but either move them to different point in the night routine or feed until drowsy but not asleep. This will help you wean gradually for your comfort and dc is not coping with several new changes at once.

I agree, think you need to work out what you are really wanting to achieve.

Do you want to stop BF but are worried about how he'll go to sleep?

or do you want to find a way for him to do bedtimes without you there, so you get a bit of freedom?

Have you ever not done bedtime? My DD likewise loves / loved BFing (just stopping now at 2.8 years!) but we did get to the point where she would do bedtime with DH if I wasn't there. It's only pretty recently that she agreed to do bedtime with him if I'm at home, though. Other times I went out, because it was clearer for her: she knew I wasn't there, so was much more likely to be ok and go to bed happily with DH. If she knew I was downstairs she would cry for me for longer than I could withstand.

I think I'll be in the same boat, my lo is 8 months and I'd like to stop at one year! What about dad doing bedtime?