screaming baby appears to find feeding torture - desperate plea for help!

[kalidasa]

I am at my wit's end here. DS2 is 16 weeks, very sunny and cheerful when I am not trying to feed him. He latched on immediately after birth with no problems and fed well at once, gained weight v. rapidly etc. But two-three weeks ago (so at about 13 weeks) he started to latch hungrily at feed time but then almost immediately comes off screaming. We repeat this over and over again for a nerve-shredding 30-40 minutes as he gets more and more hysterical before he finally settles to the feed. He appears to be in pain. It doesn't happen with every single feed, but about 2/3 of them - say 3 of the 5 day time feeds on average.

Possibly relevant facts: he has had one bottle a day since birth, but it happens with the bottle too, though not quite as often (about 50% of the time) and with the bottle once he gets going he is OK, the problem is just at the beginning. So for whatever reason the bottle seems to be a bit easier for him.

I can I think see two 'tooth buds' on his middle lower gum, though I'm doubting myself a bit as it seems very early? If they are teeth, they haven't broken the surface yet. Could this all be a teething problem? He is chewing his fists and anything else he can get desperately all the time, even straight after a large feed.

When he is distressed as I try to feed him, either a dummy or chewing on my finger calm him down most quickly. I have tried teething gel and it seems to help slightly - he latches on and goes for a bit longer - but doesn't solve the problem.

It is just so awful, I feel I am torturing him every time, it is totally nerve-shredding. He has wet/dirty nappies so he is definitely getting a reasonable amount but I am worried that he may be underfeeding a bit cumulatively.

He did suffer quite badly with colic from 4-12 weeks but it faded from around 10 weeks on cue and there was a lovely fortnight-ish before this new problem appeared.

Sorry for the epic essay but would be so grateful for any help or suggestions. Just called breastfeeding helpline who suggested reflux but I thought that caused pain during/after a feed not at the beginning? And he never really throws up, just small posseting sometimes in a totally normal way.

I'm no expert but you sounds understandably distraught so can only suggest 2 things- attend a breast feeding clinic ASAP, and try and calm him down. My baby was also screaming before and shortly after latching on and HV suggested only putting her on when calm- even if she's hysterical take a minute or 2 to calm her. My baby was taking in lots of air during her screaming which led to painful wind. Honestly your situation sounds a little different but worth a try until you can get to clinic

Best of luck

Thanks diamond - he actually doesn't scream before the first latch on, he is usually quite eager for it but not yet crying. But I will try to make sure he is as calm as possible before starting. We had a better day a couple of days ago with only one bad feed and I thought whatever the problem was was improving but then the last 48 hours have been hellish!

Am going to look into breastfeeding clinics (though a bit tricky as have a two year old as well).

It could well be teething, the action caused by baby sucking in to latch on can be very painful for them when teething. I would use teething gel regularly for a day or two and see if that helps.

Another thought - I had this with DD and it turned out to be thrush, firstly in her mouth which was causing her pain and discomfort, then in my breasts which was absolute bloody agony. Worth considering.

I second the suggestion of going to a breastfeeding support group, one with a HV or feeding specialist to ask for help and a second opinion.

And don't worry about taking your 2 year old to breastfeeding clinics, they often have toys out for older children and are held in child friendly places like children's centres etc. I always took my 2 year old with me.

Both of my kids did this, but later on. My milk was flowing too fast & the sudden rush of it gave them a fright. Hand express some onto a muslin before you feed if you are a bit full

Thrush?

Thanks always. My doubt about the teething is that my memory from DS1 is that it's a bad couple of days each time, not weeks of horror, but perhaps DS2 is just extra sensitive/unlucky! Or maybe it's worse if they are very little? I did wonder if the breastfeeding 'action' (which is a bit more like chewing) uses the gums more than the bottlefeeding and that's why the bottle is a bit easier for him. He seems to really enjoy quite firm pressure directly on the gums, e.g. with my finger.

I thought of thrush but he has no symptoms that I can see - no white patches (apart from the suspicious tooth-y bumps!) and I have no pain at all. But I'm going to see GP to rule this out just in case.

It did start around the time I had a week of antibiotics for an infected wisdom tooth though. Could he have thrush without much to see?

Good to know about bf clinic. Though my toddler is a bit on the anxious side and generally refuses to enter any unfamiliar room! Worth a try though.

Some times there are no symptoms of thrush so it's possible

If it was after your antibiotics, I would consider if perhaps your gut flora is out of balance and consequently, his is. Breastmilk will have more food traces than formula so could be causing a problem. If you take probiotics, long chain fatty acids and vitamin A, your gut will heal and so will his.

Thanks all. It started near beginning of ab course because I remember wondering if it was changing the taste to start with. But finished them a couple of weeks ago now. Am grateful for all suggestions - at least I have things to try!

I could have written your post myself a few weeks ago. I contacted bf counsellors and we ruled everything out but my ds still screamed as soon as I tried to feed him. Even though I couldn't see any symptoms it turns out it was thrush, and the usual oral drops didn't help, only the oral gel Miconazole. Within a day of using it feeding was back to normal.

Thanks chocolate. Saw GP this morning who said it doesn't sound like typical reflux but has prescribed for that anyway and suggested we give it a try in case it helps. Was it your GP who prescribed you the gel for thrush? He seems a bit better so trying to stay calm about it but it is so frazzling! I'm wondering if we should just switch to bottles because although he does it with the bottle too it's usually not quite as bad.

Yes, it was the GP, although I think that baby has to be 20 weeks as there's a slight choking risk. Have you dried the oral drops though, your Health Visitor can give you those, but you need to do it in conjunction with treating your breasts too. I ended up giving ds formula at some feeds as I just couldn't cope with the screaming but I've struggled to get those feeds back as I've always had a bit of a low supply, but I think you just need to do what you can. My ds also has reflux and is on gaviscon and ranitidine but it was most definitely the Thrush that caused the problem.

Could've written your post last year... Not sure of if this will confuse the situation but turned out to be dairy/soya protein coming through my bm. Ended up being prescribed special formula an worked immediately.