Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Please tell me your lovely self weaning tales

13 replies

MummyPig24 · 01/02/2015 20:23

When I had dc3 I never had a goal of how long I would breastfeed him for. Having not bf dc1 and encountering just about every problem under the sun with dc2 I was just thrilled that it was fairly easy this time.

Now baby is almost 11 months old and I have no plans to wean him, and he doesn't seem to be ready to self wean yet. I have a strong suspicion that he will keep going for a good while.

Part of me is keen to allow him to feed for as long as he wants, and to decide himself when he wants to stop. Although I can't see into the future and I have no idea how I will feel in 3 months, or 6 months. But he is a tenacious little chap, stubborn as they come and fiercely independent. I suspect he will camp out on the boob for years to come if he has his way but I also don't think I'm going to be able to wean him without a fight.

I don't want to fight. Please tell me your baby or toddler or child weaned themselves quietly and happily with no upset to either party!

OP posts:
ThisFenceIsComfy · 01/02/2015 20:28

Yes DS self-generated at 2y4m with no tears. I had previously tried weaning him and it always ended up with tears, screaming and a worse sleep pattern.

In the end I just used the "don't offer, don't refuse" approach and he eventually self-weaned very happily. There were times when I thought he never would but I'm glad I waited it out.

ThisFenceIsComfy · 01/02/2015 20:29

He didn't self generate obviously that was weaned. I hate my phone

NotMrsTumble · 01/02/2015 20:34

Ds2 self weaned at around 13 months, though I suspect a new medication might have altered taste /supply. Still producing small amounts of milk nearly a year later though Hmm which definitely didn't happen with my older 2 who were only bf for 4-6 mos.

MyNameIsSuz · 01/02/2015 20:36

I was worried about my ds never weaning, we cut down a lot but still going at 14 months. Then he had a virus and didn't want his bedtime milk, and that was it!

Original poster
MummyPig24 · 02/02/2015 08:10

Thank you everyone, I definitely don't want to have to force him to wean but I'm not sure I want to be breastfeeding a 4 year old either. Not that there is anything wrong with that, I just don't think its for me.

OP posts:
spekulatius · 02/02/2015 18:07

Can I ask, if you do the don't offer, don't refuse approach, how do you get them to sleep without bf?

girliefriend · 02/02/2015 18:14

I think I cut down the feeds so was only offering in the morning and evening, then when dd was nearly a year she got a bad cold and did not want to bf. I was Sad but it also felt like the right time and given that it was not straight forward to bf I felt proud to have kept going as long as we did.

ThisFenceIsComfy · 02/02/2015 19:54

During the night if DS woke then I would try getting him back to sleep by just cuddling, ssh-patting etc but if he got upset then I would feed. Took a while but eventually the feeds just trailed off.

Original poster
MummyPig24 · 03/02/2015 12:43

Spek I stopped feeding to sleep at about 7 months in a bid to sort out his horrendous sleeping. Or not sleeping as it were.

Thanks for the advice everyone. I've been going for don't offer, don't refuse and he mainly asks for morning and mid afternoon and sometimes the evening feed is nice and relaxed, other times fidgety and fractious.

OP posts:
PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 03/02/2015 14:02

I am interested in this too. My first two self weaned when I got pregnant with the next baby. DS is my last, so that's not going to work this time. Grin

GiantGaspingSatanicCyst · 03/02/2015 14:07

Both of mine self-weaned at around 13 months, just after they learned to walk. We had naturally ended up at just bedtime feeds by then, which made it easier I suppose.

With DS, I offered one night and he pushed my boob away in a 'talk to the hand' motion Shock Grin and that was that. With DD, I stopped offering and she never asked. Was a bit sad both times but also grateful and amazed not to have to battle about it.

ChatEnOeuf · 03/02/2015 15:47

DD self weaned at 14m. She was just having an evening feed then, and in an effort to stop feeding to sleep she had EBM from a cup after a BF. I went back to work and on my long shifts she just had the cups of milk. Then she started banging on the fridge door around bedtime shouting 'milll!'. One of her first loves words. Painless and no battle. Now the next challenge will be when DC2 enters the world, will she want to share the milk??

MindfulBear · 04/02/2015 21:31

DS is 32mo and, after a very rocky start, still bf. USually only wake up and bed time, however sometimes they get skipped and so long as he is distracted by something else (like b'fast!!) then there is no problem. This was not the case when he turned 2yo. Then he rarely missed wake up or bedtime boob (only if i was away) and would often try to get a sneaky extra session at other times of day too!!

He sometimes falls asleep before I go into nurse him. Most nights I nurse him and then leave him to fall asleep but will also fall asleep on the boob.
However the fact sessions are now being skipped tells me we have entered the weaning zone but from the people I have spoken to that could mean months or years yet!!!! The morning one is definitely the one that he tries not to miss though. he can get very insistent "I NEED your milk" being a favourite phrase!!

DS is also very tenacious, knows his own mind and incredibly independent (so long as he knows I am there, otherwise his strong attachment comes out and he can start bawling "you lost me"!!) so I have at times wondered how long he might bf for. however after the start we had it is a nice thing to wonder about!!!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page