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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Feeding to sleep... How do you do it?

33 replies

Bellyrub1980 · 21/12/2014 10:06

Stupid question alert!!

I have a 6wk old baby and regularly read posts about 'feeding your baby to sleep'... Usually about how to stop. But I have never successfully fed my baby to sleep! I would love to be able to do this!!!

Is there a trick to it???

My baby will dose at the breast, but will never fall into a deep sleep. The only thing that achieves that is the fact that she stays awake ALL DAY and reaches total exhaustion by about 10pm. She never properly settles after her feeds in the middle of the night.

OP posts:
Original poster
Bellyrub1980 · 21/12/2014 10:07

*doze

OP posts:
HollyBdenum · 21/12/2014 10:17

You lie or sit down with the baby with everything you need for the next couple of hours. You feed the baby. The baby dozes. The baby half wakes up again, finds your nipple, feeds for a bit longer and falls asleep, still sucking a little bit, with your boob still in her mouth. If you gently try to take your nipple out, she will start waking up, or sucking harder. A few minutes later, you can take your nipple away without disturbing her. Then you stay snuggled up to the baby reading a book or having a nap when she sleeps. Some people can transfer the baby to a cot at this point, but lots wake up.

RoseberryTopping · 21/12/2014 13:12

Mine never have either. They have always taken what they need and then had a dummy to suck on to sleep. No chance of feeding to sleep as it just makes him cry

TheGirlAtTheJingleBellRockShow · 21/12/2014 19:53

My DD feeds to sleep at night, but rarely for naps. She's feeding to sleep right now actually!
She'll suckle for a about 40 minutes then pop off in a milk drunk sleepy state. We snuggle for a while longer then I can put her in the cot. She'll then wake 4-5 hours later for her next feed. She's 6 months old....
Doesn't happen during the day.

squizita · 21/12/2014 20:42

Mine doesn't feed to sleep unless say I really need the loo and don't have the heart to shift her very much at all.
Feeding does put her into a calm happy state so if she's tired or its bedtime she will then drift off a few minutes later though. The good thing about that is an expressed bottle and rocking also do this with a bit more effort so I need not worry if dh is putting her to bed.

mineofuselessinformation · 21/12/2014 20:52

Following what pp have said, the only way I've successfully done it is to have a blanket around them so that when they are laid in the basket / cot, the different temperature doesn't wake them.

ElleDubloo · 23/12/2014 13:13

Our LO (8 weeks) always gets sleepy after feeds, and sometimes even nods off during a feed in which case the nipple will just slip out of her mouth. The effect is temporary, and she'll happily wake up again in 2-3 mins if there's something interesting going on. But this temporary effect is useful at night if I can't get her to settle any other way - I lie down next to her side by side and feed her until she's sleepy/asleep, then I stay very still until she's sleeping more deeply, then I can get up and leave.

Daveface · 23/12/2014 13:15

I think your problem is tired related. Over tired babies find it so much harder to go to sleep. Why is she awake all day?

anothernumberone · 23/12/2014 13:16

DS would feed to sleep but dh had to lift him off me if i got up he woke up.

Original poster
Bellyrub1980 · 23/12/2014 21:03

Daveface I agree, I think my baby is over tired. I'm not really sure why she doesnt naturally fall asleep in the day, I can tell she gets tired but she fights it. For a 6 week old baby she is very interactive and interested in the world around her. I probably over stimulate her, visitors definitely do because making her smile and chuckle is irresistible (I'm probably biased!!)

Over the last few days I've been making a conscious effort to lull her to sleep a couple of times a day using her sling and pram. I think it might be helping.

How do you all get your babies to nap during the day?

OP posts:
FATEdestiny · 23/12/2014 23:21

At 6 weeks old really your baby should be sleeping on and off pretty much all day. She must be exhausted if she is not sleeping during the day.

As a general rule for the first 16 weeks, if baby has been awake for 2 hours then it's time to get her to sleep. At 6 weeks I'd say an hour awake and it's time to get her to sleep.

My DD is 12 weeks now and still has only about 3 hours of proper awake time per day (in hour slots). She sleeps around 18 hours in 24. Feeds around 2-3 hourly through the day but sleeps 11-7 at night.

Plenty of time for interactive play when she is a bit older.

Original poster
Bellyrub1980 · 24/12/2014 04:46

That's for that FATEdestiny. She has been like this since week 3. I feel terrible now. But with the sling and the pram she is definitely sleeping more in the day.

Do you manage to get your baby to sleep in the crib during the day? If so.... How??? Mine will manage 10 minutes and then wake up!!

OP posts:
Original poster
Bellyrub1980 · 24/12/2014 04:47

*thanks for that

OP posts:
squizita · 24/12/2014 10:15

I replicate pram conditions in the moses basket. Put a muslin over the hood, quiet sounds (tv with voices) in the background and seem very relaxed about whether she sleeps or just coos to herself. She usually has a quick play with the dangle toys and drifts off after a while. As she is happy and safe I can do a few things while she's in there. I am a complete wuss and could never leave her crying - she is happy to sit in there luckily!

FATEdestiny · 24/12/2014 10:40

Do you manage to get your baby to sleep in the crib during the day? If so.... How???

Nope. DD is my fourth child so I have learnt that the easy option is the best option for this age. You just want baby to sleep, no matter where/how. Routines and good sleep habits develop later, for now it is just sleep...anyhow.

DD mostly sleeps in the bouncy chair (minus the toy arch), which allows for gentle bouncing with foot whilst sat on the sofa.

As soon as she gets grouchy she goes into bouncy chair, dummy in mouth and is bounced to sleep within a minute or two. Should she wake within an hour she is left where she is, dummy reinserted and bounced back to sleep.

She'll also sleep in the carseat or pushchair if we are out.

I don't use a crib but she's fine in the cosleeper cot at night.

Redling · 24/12/2014 10:50

I let DS sleep on me mainly with a transfer to crib if in a deep sleep and have done since birth, he's 18 weeks now. No way could he go more than 2-3 hours now without sleep, and as a PP said 1 hour max at 6 weeks. He was still asleep nearly all day at that age. Don't worry about putting babies down to sleep at that age, they must must sleep however you can make them. My DS could never have dropped off alone at that age and I also had a week of wondering why he was screamingly unhappy but not sleeping, then realised he couldn't sleep without my help! Sling is great, wear her all day if it helps. I just sit still for an hour cuddling him for naps most days, it's restrictive but the way I see it, it's still a short period in the grand scale of things and soon he won't let me cuddle for hours! It doesn't affect his nights when he goes down easy in his cot, day sleep seems to be totally different! You may see a totally different baby if you let her just sleep most the day, I did, he rarely cries at all as it was always overtiredness. Good luck and enjoy!

BertieBotts · 24/12/2014 11:02

Some babies are just more relaxed than others. Yours sounds very alert for whatever reason :)

I used to co sleep and use slings, if you have a male partner lying on Dad's chest while he hums or talks to her (reading works or just any slow soothing talking) seems to help because of the vibration of the man's voice.

Redling · 24/12/2014 11:02

I found this so helpful!

www.mybabysleepguide.com/2013/02/average-sleep-charts-by-age.html?m=1

Redling · 24/12/2014 11:08

Except I ignore the 8-12 hours night sleep average at 4 months which in the case of my DS is crap, he's done 6 hours once or twice but is still a feed every 4 hours a night baby! I just use it as a guide for how much overall sleep he needs and awake time during the day.

squizita · 24/12/2014 15:13

That's way more than my baby has ever done Redling - she isn't even tired after 1 1/2 hours. And I was told 14 hr a day (the most she'll do - though she sleeps v well with 2 brief wakes- for 11 or so hours at night so clearly can sleep). In the day she has 2 or 3 naps easily and without fuss if tired - Bit she'd never ever nap every hour and a half. Never. And because she's supposed to believe me I try.
That talk of "optimum" amounts of 18 hr for a 3 month old make me want to cry. Like I'm harming her. But she shows no signs of over tiredness and HV, GP and nurse all say it's ok.

I really worry when I read these things she doesn't sleep "enough" and thar is why she only grows slowly no matter how often I feed.

Redling · 24/12/2014 15:38

It says it's a guide on the page and that its an average amount of sleep. It's not intended as a definite and I didn't say it was, and as I pointed out the night sleep is clearly not the case for all babies.. But for my baby I found it helpful to watch him for overtired signs at around these points as he generally stuck to it. I don't take these things as gospel and clearly said it wasn't.

Redling · 24/12/2014 15:43

Direct quote from that site "Remember, everything is an average and should only be used as a reference point—your child is a unique little person."

FATEdestiny · 24/12/2014 16:05

I've not seen a sleep guide before, but that's a petty good guide Redling. Thanks for posting. With the exception of my PFB, my other children have pretty much followed that. Give or take, given that all children are a bit different. But I would agree that in my experience the table is a decent average.

BertieBotts · 24/12/2014 17:01

Those averages look highly suspect to me. I know a better one but I can't find it right now, look at this for a rough guide: www.isisonline.org.uk/how_babies_sleep/normal_sleep_development/

rootypigsinblankets · 24/12/2014 17:03

OP try to get her to sleep 90 minutes after waking in the morning. And make sure you're winding her thoroughly. It took me months to understand how much winding DD needed, poor girl!