Bottle aversion/silent reflux/stressed!!

[CharleyBear1]

Hi everyone

Sorry for the ramble, I've not posted before so please bear with me!

My DD is 11 weeks old and we have been experiencing feeding issues really since the very beginning. The most worrying thing is that she doesn't take "enough" according to the box, almost a third less. She's only putting on 3-4oz per week so we are slowly dropping through the centiles.

The short version is that she never seemed to latch the bottle well and her tummy was always full of air - burps usually resulting in most of her milk coming back up with it. At her 6 week check out GP pointed out that she was tongue tied and we subsequently saw a specialist who divided it. I really thought that would be an end to it (as you do, living in hope!!) however we are still having probs.

We've changed to mam bottles which are brilliant and her latch is now great, the GP prescribed colief which seemed to work for about 2 weeks but has now stopped. Infacol seemed to make her sick so stopped giving her that a while ago.

We are now at a point where she will only take a couple of ounces at each feed and I feel like I'm forcing the bottle back at her - 9 times out of 10 once she takes it back she will have more but never really more than 4oz at a time.

The HV have suggested that we wait for DD to ask for food but she doesn't tend to do that - I think she now associates the bottle with tummy ache?!

I'm 99% sure that she has silent reflux and having talked to our GP we have tried gaviscon (worked for about a week) and now ranitidine. I can't say I've seen any improvement but it's only been a week.

Thanks for reading my small novel - in writing this all down I've just realised that I don't really know what my question is!!! Maybe I'm just looking for any ideas/experience/suggestions on what else it might be or what I can do to encourage her to eat more?! She isn't a massive crier and does sleep 9 hours at night but I'm so worried that she's not eating enough that I'm getting completely stressed about it!!

Thank you xx

@R1versmum how reassuring to hear that it worked, I'm bracing myself for a tough few weeks but have total faith it will work! That's interesting my DD has plateaued around the same volumes also- since she was about 6 weeks or so- this worried me also as DS (now 2) was an absolute massive feeder but I suppose they really are all different!

Have joined the Facebook group for some tips whilst awaiting the book!x

@shoesplash feel free to message me on here if you feel like you need a chat/vent! X

@R1versmum I will do that thank you!

@shoesplash @R1versmum
Hope you don't mind me jumping in...I'm in the same boat! Except I'm combi feeding. DD was getting really fussy at the breast about 8 weeks ago and weight gain was super slow, so I was advised to offer formula top ups after. It was weird- sometimes she wouldn't want any and sometimes she would guzzle it all down. At one point though she refused to feed at all and we ended up in a&e only to be told that "it's just colic" and if I can force feed her 90ml they'll let me go home, otherwise they'll tube feed her. Managed to get 90ml down the poor soul, and the a&e doctor advised me to switch to fully formula feeding ASAP so I could see exactly how much she was getting. I tried going cold turkey with BFing but DD just wasn't having it so now we are combi feeding again. She is ever so slightly better at the breast but I still don't think she's getting as much as she should altogether. Can I ask vaguely what the book you're talking about sets out? GP and HV have been fairly unhelpful. DD is on a high dose of omeprazole but still uncomfortable and I think it's causing tummy issues.

@Gigi10 sorry to hear your having some issues, doesnt sound very good you being told to force feed your baby milk. Must have been so upsetting for you all.

Basically a feeding aversion comes about when we pressure our babies to feed. That can be subtle like offering the bottle numerous times, following their mouths with the teat when they turn away etc to actually force feeding. Its usually done by us parents with the best intentions because we want them to feed well. The baby then makes negative associations with feeding so doesnt want to do it anymore. So they will refuse feeds or just take enough to take away the hunger.

If you have a read through the website i linked in the previous post it talks about aversions in more detail and signs babies show if they have one. See if you recognise any of it. Also the facebook group is great, they have a lot of information on their as well.

The book details how to overcome the aversion, its a rough road but worth it in the end.

Hope that helps x

@R1versmum thanks so much, that's really helpful! I will check both out. Really hope we get past this...just feels never ending right now and I dread every feed because it always ends badly.

@Gigi10 honestly if you read the information and you think it might apply to your situation, give the programme a go. Its hard but if you stick to it you should see improvements in a couple days.

On average it takes people about 2 weeks to become aversion free.

I totally understand how you feel, and honestly i still feel massive anxiety when feeding my baby even though we are over the aversion x

@R1versmum I just ordered the book...can't wait for it to arrive! I wonder if the principles would work with BF aversion too? I'm keen to try and continue BFing as long as I can.

Will keep you posted on my endeavours!

@Gigi10 the book is more geared towards bottle aversion but if you join the facebook group there are mums on their with breastfeeding aversions so there will definately be someone to answer any questions you have.

Good luck! Do keep me posted, i really am wishing you all the best x

@Gigi10 we are on day 2 of the programme, it's tough but my little girl is definitely more content at not being constantly offered milk- it does make me very anxious but thinking long term
@R1versmum recommended the Facebook group to me and it's great, not sure where you are based but I ordered the book almost 2 weeks ago and I am still waiting on it due to postal delays so I downloaded it yesterday and it was definitely worth it, could relate to a lot of the testimonies and it's also very encouraging to see that those babies overcame their aversion!
Feel free to message me if you like

Hi @shoesplash and @R1versmum, how are you getting on now? I have just come to the realisation that my twins seem to have a feeding aversion. Such am upsetting idea, I can't believe I've harmed them in this way and I feed like an absolutely terrible parent. Do you have anybtips for getting through this?

Hi @RosettaR

Sorry to hear you are having some difficulties feeding. We are thankfully aversion free now and have been for some time. I would 100% recommend joining the facebook group i mention further up and buying Rowena Bennett's book. We followed the programme in there to overcome the aversion. Please dont blame yourself, everything we do/have done is because we thought we were doing the best for our babies. The programme is very simple and the group offer an amazing amount of support. Good luck! Xx

@RosettaR

Hi *@shoesplash and *@R1versmum**, how are you getting on now? I have just come to the realisation that my twins seem to have a feeding aversion. Such am upsetting idea, I can't believe I've harmed them in this way and I feed like an absolutely terrible parent. Do you have anybtips for getting through this?

Hi @RosettaR just to echo what *@R1versmum* has said- the book alongside the support of the FB group was invaluable, we are also now aversion free.

I found it a tough programme as I felt I was going against my instinct to get my baby to eat at all costs BUT it does work! Also please do not feel bad at all- this is more common than I realised- the amount of members in the Facebook group alone is testament to that!

I'd really recommend downloading the book and reading it ASAP if that is an option for you.

There is also a lady on Instagram @thebottleaversioncoach who had a similar approach

Hang in there, it does get better!!

PS- dealing with this with twins must be a whole other level- you are doing really well to even recognise it and begin to resolve it- you will get there!!