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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

talk to me about breastfeeding past age 1

19 replies

littlealien01 · 14/10/2014 08:35

Currently trying to decide whether to continue and would like to know your experiences and why you chose what you chose/ how you find it.

Current thoughts:
Pros
We both enjoy it
Shes still little
Health benefits
Stability as she starts nursery and i go bk to work
Keep the ability to feed her back to sleep at 6am

Cons
Thinking about ttc
Will it make it hard to stop/when do you then stop
Still wont be able to go out at night (milk monster overnight)
How much would she nag for it as shes older?
Will it mean loads of expressing around work

OP posts:

StripyBanana · 14/10/2014 08:39

We found it easier to stop when my daughter was older as she was more intersted in other things (that said we still stopped under 2).

A halfway house might be to gently encourage nightweaning? We did that and moved daughters to their own room. We all got more sleep but still had lots of milk feeds in the day.

StripyBanana · 14/10/2014 08:42

Also you don't need to express I wpuldnt have thought. After one she can have cows milk while youre at work (or water) and you could just feed in the morning and evenings and weekends?,it's easier for them to accept its not on offer if they can't see you, and it would still be on offer when you're home.

I'm not at all an expert btw, just fed my 2past one as didn't really think of stopping!

StripyBanana · 14/10/2014 08:43

It would be a lovely comfort after nursery and keeps the bond. But equally if you feel youve had enough that's fine too. You've done well!

makeminea6x · 14/10/2014 08:45

I didn't bf for much longer than this as I got pregnant and stopped when DD was 14 months but a lot of your cons could maybe be dealt with without stopping.

You could certainly nightwean if you wanted to. There are gentle and less gentle ways of doing this. With DD we used cc successfully at 8.5 mo, DS laughed in our faces at that but then he (very very lucky for me) night weaned himself recently. But there are gentle methods and others can help you with that.

If you night-wean bf will probably not prevent conception. There's am ongoing thread on TTC while bf.

I didn't express past this age because I only fed her morning and night. Your supply will be well established so you may just need to do it as comfort demands.

As to nagging that probably varies child to child but you can stop whenever you want, if it gets to be a problem.

StickLady · 14/10/2014 08:55

My son is 2 years 4 months and still going strong. We have found breastfeeding to be fantastic when:
a) we all got a d &v bug and he was able to breastfeed through it and was hardly affected at all while the rest of us felt really bad, ( and bfing is easier than other foods when you're sick if you're the only one there) and
b) at a family wedding he found it all a bit overwhelming and was frustrated the bride wouldn't play with him and was howling and inconsolable. ... 5mins breastfeeding and he was absolutely fine. We'd been on the point of giving up and going home as we'd tried everything to cheer him up and he doesn't feed during the day anymore but we gave it a go and were able to stay for another 5 hours!

I can go out and leave him at night, he's fine with that, the only con in my opinion is that sometimes I want to get properly pissed! My periods came back the week after I went back to work.

CactusSeven · 14/10/2014 09:01

I just carried on past one without really thinking about it.

Stopping at one is a bit arbitrary really, it's just a number. If you go past one, you don't have to continue to 18 months, or two, or whenever. You don't have to stop at a specific milestone, you can still carry on or stop whenever you want.

I night weaned around 15 months.

I had stopped feeding during the day at 11 months, when I went back to work. I never expressed at work, I would just feed DD when we got home after picking her up from nursery. My supply adjusted fine.

Once I had night weaned, we very quickly went down to one feed first thing in the morning and one at night. And I just stopped those when I got fed up with it - I suddenly felt I couldn't stand it any more, not for a single feed, so I just stopped, and DD was absolutely fine with it (she was a few weeks off being 2).

JuniperTisane · 14/10/2014 09:10

Both DS's have fed past 1. DS1 finished recently just before his 4th birthday. He gradually dropped down from 3-4 a day at 1 to just one feed every few days by 3.5 and then just... stopped. Not a conscious last feed just never asked again. It wasn't traumatic at all.

DS2 is 21 months and feeds twice a day, morning and night. At 2 I shall stop offering and just let him ask. It worked well for DS1.

I didn't have any problem conceiving DS2 while feeding (or feeding while pregnant) but I was down to 2 feeds a day by then.

I do think its probably a good idea to start introducing the idea of night weaning if you want to conceive though.

JuniperTisane · 14/10/2014 09:15

I never expressed beyond 6 months, it isn't necessary at this stage.

You can start introducing the idea of no night feeds at any point really. Either one feed at a time if she's really demanding or go the whole hog over a few nights. It is doable and fine to do.

leedy · 14/10/2014 10:53

DS2 is nearly 2 and really, BF is so easy at this stage - doesn't feed at night any more unless he's unwell, I don't express in work any more (and haven't since shortly after a year). He has a feed in the morning, sometimes after work/mid afternoon, and bedtime. I can go out to things in the evening, let someone else put him to bed, etc. etc.

DS1 just stopped gradually from about 2.5, lost interest by himself (and at that stage I didn't offer if he didn't ask) and dropped his last feed when I was pregnant with his brother. Had no problem getting pregnant while still feeding once my periods were back (they actually came back at 8 months).

Original poster

littlealien01 · 14/10/2014 17:47

Thanks all didnt expect so many comments. Thats been really helpful.

Dd is only 8.5 months so i have lots of time but everyone around me seems to be stopping. She barely feeds in the day now (which ive encouraged with a stubborn bottle refuser and lots of kit days) so i suspect some of the night feeds are reverse cycling at this stage...but if i could successfully nightwean id be much more likely to continue when i go bk to work in jan. Encouraging to think its possible altho maybe id just lose my tool forgetting her back to sleep!

As cactusseven said stopping at 1 feels a bit arbitary and currently i dont feel like i want to.

Your comments have been really encouraging. Thankyou

OP posts:

JuniperTisane · 14/10/2014 17:51

I think you'll find that as she eats more food, she will gradually reduce the milk anyway.

Superworm · 14/10/2014 20:31

I fed until DS was 2.5. Didn't set out to at all it just kind if happened. DS had a morning and evening fed from about a year - BFing a toddler is your reward for feeding a baby You gets lots of cuddles, you dint have to do it too and and you both get all the health benefits.

StripyBanana · 14/10/2014 20:59

I think I used some of Jay Gordens night weaning ideas.
Basically between certain hours (something like 12 and 5 initially?) dad comforts baby. They may well cry, but unlike so called "controlled crying" you know that they are being comforted and cuddled by dad. They learn they are safe in dads arms without milk and it breaks the association between waking up and needing milk to get back to sleep.

It worked both times for us.

StripyBanana · 14/10/2014 21:00

drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html

is a good article. He does suggest waiting until a year I think.

starlight1234 · 14/10/2014 21:09

I b/fed till DS was nearly 2. I found after he turned one people seemed to question why I was still doing it. He was a big boy and by the time he was 18 mnths I had withdrew to only doing it in private. not long after 18 mnths I went down to night feeds only and stopped just before he was 2 due to exhaustion and hoping he would start to sleep through that however didn't happen till he was 4.

He did had a sickness bug at 14 months. Docs seemed to physically relax when they new he was stil b/fed... I felt it was far more a natural cut off than a sharp stop.

Do what is eight for you as a family

VelvetEmbers · 14/10/2014 21:18

My eldest 3 all self-weaned at 15 months.

Youngest was forcibly weaned at 4y 3m as I had to have chemo.

When they are older they can nag for it, but they do have the understanding when you have to put them off. I found it helpful when I went back to work, full days, when DD was 11 mo, to be able to reconnect. You don't need to express by then either. DD was quite happy with water and food at nursery, then just BF when we were home.

catellington · 14/10/2014 21:24

Dd is 19 mo and feeds several times a day, fed to sleep and a couple of times at night.

She stays overnight at my DM with no drama, loves it, has a cup of cows milk and goes to sleep

I got pg when she was 15 months old after trying for about 10 months

Tried nightweaning for one or two nights but gave up as I realised we all get more sleep if she can just bf at night. We cosleep and she sort of helps herself so I don't need to do anything

The only down side for me is I do get disapproval, mil for example, and have found that isolating, but am planning to start going to la leche league meetings for some support and to meet some like minded people

Good luck with whatever you decide to do!

weebairn · 15/10/2014 10:10

For me bf was hard work till 6 months, a bit easier till a year, then great from a year onwards. I loved bf a toddler.

I night weaned gradually between 12-14 months (partly due to working some night shifts) so I could still go away for a night/go out etc. I did it for work but I did feel a lot freer once she wasn't feeding overnight. We didn't have any choice with the night weaning with my work, dad just dealt with it. A couple of nights were difficult and then it was fine and she never asked again.

I returned to work at 10 months, some of my shifts are 13 hours plus, never expressed, she just had food and water when I wasn't there.

I found it got so much easier and more adaptable as she got older and I really loved and cherished that time.

Conceived first month of trying at 15 months while still on 2-3 feeds a day. Kept bf until 20 weeks into the pregnancy when she lost interest.

ChunkyPickle · 15/10/2014 10:30

I've gone with the flow with both mine, and not really had any hassles with any of your worries. What I've done that's helped:

As they've got older, I've associated feeding with lying down in bed, so it just doesn't occur to them to think about it if we're not near bed.

Gradually encouraged them to night wean - shushing unless they actually get upset. DS2 is pretty much sleeping 7-7 now at 1, DS1 took until 18 months, minimum of hassle for me because we co-sleep.

Both of them have been happy to go all day without milk from about 1, I had no issues with engorgement or supply, and they had no issues eating/drinking normal food

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