Night weaning with a gro clock

[melonribena]

My ds is 25 mths old.

He has bf from birth, co slept and still wakes twice for a feed.

I need to sleep!

He will happily go to sleep in his cot after a bf at 7.30 on with no problems at all.

However, he then wakes 2.5 hours later for a feed and then about 6 hours after this for another feed. He definitely drinks, but settles straight back afterwards (in our bed! He won't go back in his cot)

I'm trying to stop the night feeds and get him into his cot all night!

I'm thinking of doing the feeding first and then when he doesn't wake for food, try and get him in his cot all night.

Is this the best plan do you think?

I was wondering also, if a gro clock might help him understand when he wakes that there is no milk until midnight for example, and gradually push it back.

Does anyone have any thoughts or experience of this?

Any help would be great. Thanks!

Anyone?

No experience of this, sorry, but didn't want to read and run.

You might get more useful responses if you post / move thread to the breast and bottle feeding forum.

Thanks!

Sorry no advise but watching with interest for a more knowledgeable mumsneter. Op I admire you for surviving 25 months of poor sleep. My dd is 9 months and im struggling.

Hi we've moved this to Breast/Bottle feeding for you
Good luck

Thank you! And thank you! I've gradually been worn more and more down I think. Isn't it strange how anything can become normal! The thought of a full nights sleep and a lie in feels so unattainable at the moment

We didn't use the gro clock for night weaning DS1 but did find it very useful when he was going through a phase of waking up at unspeakable o'clock in the morning - for some reason the independent "the clock says it's not time to get up yet" seemed much more compelling to him than just me or DP telling him the same thing. Might be worth a shot anyway, maybe in combination with the Dr Jay Gordon night weaning plan.

Dr jay Gordon night weaning plan?!! Sounds intriguing! Where might I find out about it! Thank you

Yes, I don't think that the gro clock would help with night weaning but might help to understand "it's night time".

Honestly though.... this was exactly the pattern DS did. Fed on going to sleep which was probably 7.30ish, then would wake about 10.30/11/11.30ish for a quick feed which tied in with the time I was going to bed anyway, then he was settled until early hours of the morning at which point he'd snuggle up and feed and go back to sleep for another couple of hours.

I put him into a bed, in his own room and told him if he woke up he could come and find me but I wouldn't come in to him. So he woke, and cried. I shouted through (well, neighbours would already be disturbed if he was crying) "DS I'm in bed, come here" and he'd toddle through. Took 3 or 4 nights of shouting out to him but he remembered after that and then over time, his morning coming into bed for a cuddle (which is fairly standard toddler behaviour, breastfed or not) just got later and later until it disappeared totally.

I used to do the 10.30/11.30 feed in his bed (because I could fit in it!) and then leave when he was asleep if I didn't fall asleep and either finish up downstairs or go to bed myself. If I wanted to go up earlier then I'd just read in bed until he woke to feed. I think he dropped the 11pm feed before the morning one because I seem to remember the morning one being the last so go but honestly can't remember. But ultimately, even with those "two night wakings" I got a full night's sleep, he stayed in his bed, it was very manageable. Had a stairgate on the stairs so he didn't get confused and fall down and left the light on in the hallway downstairs so the hallway had a little bit of light but not too much.

I think he was about 2.4 or 2.6 by the time he consistently went 7-7 (actually more like 7-9, can't wake him up these days!) so if it helps it really doesn't go on forever.

Bertie, that is very interesting and helpful, thank you.

When your ds toddled into your room, would u attempt not to feed him or did he just give it up on his own?

No I did feed him, but he stopped coming, I suppose because he was warm in bed and the effort to get out and come in was too much and he fell asleep again! Thinking about it I must have moved him earlier as there was a middle of the night feed at about 2 which was when he used to cry and come in. Then I'd end up moving him back after he fell asleep and he'd come back in at about 4/4.30. (That was a tiring phase!) The 2am feed was first to go (I suspect he became too lazy to walk all the way in) but the 4am feed stayed and got slowly later and later until he was waking up after me by the time he started nursery. Actually my now DH had just moved in at the time and he worked nights and so I think DS started listening for his key at 7am before he'd come through so the gro clock could work in that sort of way. They say you should set it for the time they're currently waking and slowly move it later, I'd use that for the early morning feed rather than the middle of the night one.

He did feed morning and night until he was over three. But it would literally just be then - not if he was hurt, not if he was upset, just bedtime and morning and for about a minute if that. The morning one stopped when I started getting up before him and the bedtime one got less and less frequent until he just hadn't done it for a few weeks (I didn't notice at this point because he was doing it so infrequently) and I offered because he was ill and he said no and then I knew he'd stopped, he was 4.

Once he started sleeping through consistently, that was it, we have never had any periods of regression or going back to night wakings unless he was ill, he's six in a few weeks so pretty consistent since then. Take heart from that if you can! I think when they sleep through younger they tend to have regressions throughout that second year, if you leave them to it I think once they do it they do it! Totally unscientific hunch though of course.

That's all great!! Thank you so much! I honestly thought it was only my ds who slept so badly!

I love the cuddles but it's impacting on my work, my relationships with friends and family and my sanity!

Here's the Dr Jay Gordon plan: drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html

We night-weaned at 15 months with the aid of a gro clock. We set the timer on it back by 1 hour each day. We did have some crying (which you may or may not be happy with - we were comfortable with a bit of crying but not with leaving her to cry at that age). The Gro clock bit worked brilliantly - even at 15 months she got it pretty quickly. But she was still waking early and needing us in the room while she pointed at the gro clock, willing the sun to come out!

Then at 21 months we decided to stop parenting her to sleep (by which I mean parenting her while she had a party in her cot for several hours). We did leave her to cry at this point, for two minutes at a time. On the third night, she never cried for more than two minutes; after a week or so there were no tears at all, and she lets us sleep in the morning - now at 25 months our 'alarm' is a shout of "Mr Sun!" over the baby monitor. My theory for the better mornings is that stopping the parenting to sleep means that she has become comfortable being awake in her cot, which also applies to the early hours when she's sleeping lightly.

Anyway, that's us. In case anything chimes.

Interesting, I am in this position now and I am so grateful for the resources I can access here.
DD is 20 months and on a good night wakes once at around 3. I go through and get into her bed with her (she has a futon on the floor)
Otherwise she sleeps well, and till a reasonable hour, though her Dad lies with her till she drops off. This can take a pretty tedious chunk of our evening. But perhaps thats more about our timekeeping/lifestyle than anything DD does.
She starts childminder in a few weeks and I am hoping that she will take naps , and begin to drop off in the evening more independently as one of posts suggested.
Any new comments or recollections of the experience of night weaning would be interesting to read.
My other question is whether anyone adapted the little story book that comes with the groclock to reflect a more nightweaning theme, and if so, how? And as an AP/ RIE inspired mum I'd really like to adjust some of the language elsewhere in it too! Lazy? Drove his parents crazy? not very nice messages!