tell me about nipple confusion - does it really exist?

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DS (now 2yo) never took a bottle until he was about 8mo and then it was only very rarely if I went out in the eve and DP did bedtime. We used formula on these rare occasions, as he'd refuse expressed milk.

DC2 is due in November and I'd like to get him/her to take the odd EBM bottle so I can a) go for the odd swim/run in the eves and b) spend some time with DS, even if it's the odd hour or so, leaving DC2 with DP.

With DS it took a good 6 weeks to establish bfing, and we didn't try our (unsuccessful...) attempts at getting him onto a bottle til he was at least 3mo old.

In other people's experience how soon should you/can you try to get the baby to take a bottle? Am aware of nipple confusing etc but some of my friends have told me its a myth and the longer you wait the harder it'll be...?

It's more important to me that I bfeed this second baby successfully, than it is to get them to take the odd bottle, but bearing in mind last time I didn't spend longer than 30mins away from DS til he was well over 8mo, am more mindful of my own sanity this time round too...!

Thanks

Watching with interest as I have just asked a similar question on a thread about bf dc2. My experience with dc1 was she had bottle top ups for the first two weeks of life. After this she was bf exclusively and we didn't bother with bottles then. When we tried to reintroduce at three months she was having none of it. Like you I couldn't leave her for long until she was eating solids well.

DD first had a TOmmee Tippee bottle at a week old and then weekly thereafter...she's now 12 weeks and no problem switching between breast and bottle. DS was the same. I didn't worry about the bottle in the early days denting my supply as she would feed about an hour later anyway!

From what I've read, lots and lots of babies are fine with both. But...I had to give some top-ups from ten days old and around three weeks we had a huge problem and she wouldn't feed from me for almost 24 hours. With a huge amount if perseverance and a lot if tears on my part, we got there. It was bloody hard, tbh. But we did overcome it and she's now fully EBF at five months. I guess, though, that a bottle every few days would be different to after each feed as I was pushed to do.

I think like most things it's down to the baby. The idea that it doesn't exist is nonsense. Just as it would be nonsense to say you'll definitely have a problem.

Good luck!

Ps. I've now got a determined bottle refuser. I was so worried about causing further problems I didn't try a bottle again till three months.. That might have been a mistake.

I think mine had her first bottle (TT) in week 1, when my nipple had a chunk out of it and it was too painful to feed, so I expressed!

I tried cup feeding and it went everywhere so just gave her the bottle and she was fine!

I had to introduce formula in week 4 or 5 due to tongue tie and no weight gain. I've kept her on 1 or 2 bottles a day since then and she doesn't care where the milk comes from..as long as she gets it!

From what I've seen from doing consultations with mothers trying to get their babies to take a bottle as they head back to work it is around six weeks that babies start to refuse bottles.

I recommend to most of my clients especially if they are returning early to work to introduce a bottle between weeks three to four and offer one a few times a week. If a mother notices that the baby is starting to refuse I recommend expressing all feeds until baby starts to comfortably take bottle again and then would keep a bottle feed every day. It really depends on the baby how flexbile they are to feed between breast and bottle.

I read something (may have been here, maybe somewhere else) that in some countries they have an incredibly low rate of nipple confusion and bottle refusing - and consequently a higher rate of long term EBF/successful mixed feeding as opposed to switching to purely FF early. It was Japan and some Mediterranean countries I think.
I wonder if it's to do with when they do things- maybe everyone does it like MrsWishyWashy says there?

That's really interesting MrsWishyWashy and squizita I think I may introduce a weekly bottle at about 3/4 weeks and go from there.

My DC1 was a bottle-refuser so I made sure I introduced occasional bottles to DC2 early on (building up to one a day from a few weeks old, usually at DC1's bedtime so that I could do that whilst DH fed DC2).

I also did this because I have problems with one breast/nipple and could only feed comfortably from one side, so used expressed milk or formula to allow my supply to replenish a little.

At 10 weeks old I was able to spend a whole day away from him with no problems apart from sore boobs. And I had the odd evening out as well, which would have been impossible with DC1.

We didn't have any nipple confusion and I bfed DC2 until 15mo.

I know quite a few friends who did similar. All committed breast feeders but had much more flexibility with bottles being used as well.

Every baby if different some will be given a bottle every day and may one day refuse others will be fine if given once every now and again. Some will be happy what ever some will never take a bottle no matter how many types you try.

I see far more mums with a bottle refusing baby, have yet to meet a breast refusing baby and I do plenty of breast feeding consultations. Worse is when mum needs to go back to work and it's so stressful with baby not taking a bottle and usually on a quick time limit.

Definitely exists, though not guaranteed. For my dc1, it was a question of flow preference. Bottle guarantees fast and consistent flow, breast not so much - in my case anyway: we had issues. I then started using a lactation aid but had to make sure I slowed down or stopped the flow through the tube sometimes to mimic a normal breastfeed, otherwise he didn't want to feed without the tube in place! These babies are not stupid.

Anecdotally it seems women with a fast let-down and abundant milk supply can combine bottles with bf more easily. Others I have known who found bottles quickly made breastfeeding difficult or impossible were like me - with slow flow and issues with let-down.

That said, this was all based on regular (at least daily) bottle feeding. Not sure if one a week could interfere with bf but then again all babies are different...

On the day my milk came in (day 3?) I was so engorged that DD wouldn't latch on so I pumped a bit off. I thought I'd try her with the bottle and she took it no problem.

She is 8 weeks old now and i give her one or two bottles a week with no problems. I'm really glad. It makes my life a bit easier.

I don't know anyone who has had nipple confusion but I do know a couple whose babies developed quite a strong bottle preference and became difficult to breastfeed, but this was down to daily bottles not occasional.

I think I gave DS1 a bottle at about 3 or 4 weeks and DS2 at about 8 weeks and both took them no problem and had daily bottles without refusing the breast. Mostly luck I reckon.

Nipple confusion does exist, but from what I gather it's pretty rare.

However, IME, if they are going to refuse a bottle, they will. My DD had her first bottle at a week old then didn't have another until 4 weeks at which point she had them a few times a week. Then at around four months she started refusing. DS had his first bottle at 3 weeks and refused it! He did reluctantly take one after lots of perseverance, but again, at around 4 months started refusing. It didn't mean I couldn't leave them though, I just timed it in between feeds or once they were on solids then DH could give them sips of water from an open cup and yoghurt/weetabix/other food when I was out.

It's not just about bottle being refused though- nipple confusion can make your nipples very sore, even lead to abrasions and bleeding.