not feeding on demand?

[aroha77]

I'm reading The Baby Whisperer and starting to regret it because it's really confusing me!!

She says not to breastfeed 'on demand' but I can't picture how it would work to do it any other way! Would i just have to ignore her if she cries a hungry looking cry at the wrong time in my routine? I feel a bit worried I'm doing it all wrong now but can't work out how to do her routine!

Thank you!

It was only 2 1/2 years ago I was told to feed my newborn every three hours...and I dutifully did, I ended up with awful mastitis, engorgement and a hungry baby! It took a little while to work out this wasn't right...it did however mean she fed for a long time from both breasts and slept well (coincidence maybe)

This time round bottle feeding (not to a schedule as he isn't keen) and drinks a few oz here and there...his sleep is awful. I'd prefer him to not be a demand feeder but I wouldn't listen to hungry baby cries...this time it's easier to go with instinct and not worry so much about 'advice'

I read all the books before DS was born, drove myself nearly daft, then quickly ditched the books and DS and I forged our own path.

I stopped seeing BF as merely a means to get nutrition into baby and that changed everything. Yes sometimes DS nurses for comfort, sometimes through hunger and sometimes he doesn't want to nurse at all!

It works ok for us and now he's 10mo and nursing a lot less. I look back on those early days when I was so confused and stressed about what to do. They seemed so long then and now they seem like they were over in the blink of an eye!

Enjoy your lovely baby :)

tobeabat - snap!

Yes, that's what I mean comfort for everyone. I personally didn't find it "comfortable" to wake up every half an hour every single night once they reached six months. At first I thought it was only me but speaking to other mums it turned everyone else was having the same problem. Yes, I had to teach my babies to sleep and they are not dummies. Neither am I. I thought this site was about sharing experiences and help those who need advice. Labelling someone a "dummy" is not what it should be about.

The Baby Whisperer is on KellyMom's list of books to avoid - kellymom.com/parenting/reviews/books-to-avoid/ they say 'Warning: These books could sabotage your breastfeeding relationship'

My babies only ever cried when they were hungry, so I don't really understand needing to differentiate a "hungry cry". If they cry feed them, if they don't want it they'll soon let you know.

Ime feeding on demand establishes it's own routine, you feed, they need changing, you change them, they sleep. And so on. Certainly new borns. I only started tweaking it when dd was 10 months old and waking at night was a habit rather than a need. I offered her water instead and she stopped waking up.

I think artificial routines put pressure and stress onto an already difficult time, it comes naturally, usually, if you let it.

Dangerous advice especially at this time of year. Babies could easily become dehydrated in this heat. A baby crying might just want to quench its thirst rather than have a feed.

Yes, I had to teach my babies to sleep and they are not dummies. Neither am I. I thought this site was about sharing experiences and help those who need advice. Labelling someone a "dummy" is not what it should be about.

no-one labelled anyone a 'dummy'

No dia there seems took be some confusion over the bit where sometime explained that a dummy is a fake nipple, therefore babies can't use Mum as a dummy, but use the dummy as Mum.

I sympathise with both points of view here. I fed vaguely on schedule following baby whisperer first time round and ended up with insufficient milk supply and FF by 4 months.

Second time round I am feeding on demand and have plenty of milk, but am also waking twice an hour during the night to 'comfort' him at 4 months. It's pretty crippling and I'll have to introduce a bottle if it goes on much longer.