How did you know when to stop bf

[PretzelPrincess]

Just that really. How did you know you were ready to stop? DS is 5 months and I want to feed till 6 months at least but I'm not so sure after that. At the beginning I thought I would feed untill a year so he could just have cows milk after but now I'm so torn.
I'm rubbish at expressing so I can't be away from him for very long. Which is fine in general but I'd like a little more flexibility. And I want my body back.
I feel guilty for wanting to stop though. As we've had little/no problems bf and I enjoy the cuddles.
Also I had a lot of preassure to formula feed from family over the past few months which I've fought against and I know it sounds silly but I feel if I switch to formula then they get what they want. Petty I know.
Argh I don't know what to do.

You can always just give a formula feed while you're away and breastfeed when together, it doesn't have to be either/or.

I found that 6 months was the hardest time in the BF journey - growth spurt, teeth and I was "touched out".

I really wanted to keep going though so I kept at it. Now DS is almost 10mo and he only feeds 9ish, 2ish and bedtime. He even (just this week!) dropped one of the night feeds so it means I can go out for a leisurely meal with friends and a few drinks.

So if you do want to keep going, the time is coming when you will get a break.

Equally as fledermaus said, you could substitute some feeds for formula. Your supply and your body are much more flexible now I believe.

Similar to eagle DS is almost 10 months and on 3 feeds a day now, it's much easier! I'm planning to drop the last daytime feed next month and just do morning/evening which will make life easier and give me more wardrobe options too. I'm hoping to wind up the breastfeeding around 1 year but I enjoy it much more than I did at 5 months. Once your DS picks up solids and drops a couple of milk feeds it will be much easier. I also agree it can't hurt to give the odd bit of formula if he'll take it. I was very precious about not giving any and worried about supply etc but it's worked brilliantly for some of my friends and I wish I'd been a bit more relaxed!

Similar to eagle DS is almost 10 months and on 3 feeds a day now, it's much easier! I'm planning to drop the last daytime feed next month and just do morning/evening which will make life easier and give me more wardrobe options too. I'm hoping to wind up the breastfeeding around 1 year but I enjoy it much more than I did at 5 months. Once your DS picks up solids and drops a couple of milk feeds it will be much easier. I also agree it can't hurt to give the odd bit of formula if he'll take it. I was very precious about not giving any and worried about supply etc but it's worked brilliantly for some of my friends and I wish I'd been a bit more relaxed!

As Eagles and Puzdets say, once DCs start eating appreciable amounts of food, especially wheatabix and yoghurt the need to BF continuously subsides.

Also they can be encouraged to do their teething on carrot and bread sticks not your nipples.

By 7 months my total bottle refusing, formula screaming at DD2 would take dilute juice from a cup, eat a pot of yoghurt and go to sleep for her dad or my DSIS and I/we got some life back.

(DD2 has never drank plain milk and carried on BFing for years, but after 7/8 months it gradually became more and more relaxed and just settled to when she'd of had a cuddle anyway).

Once they start eating solids the breastfeeds really do go down (it takes a couple of months though) so you end up feeding much less.

Plus your supply is quite established by 6 months so you can do some formula feeds here and there if you like I'm sure.

I reduced feeds gradually (worried about engorgement) from around 8 or 9 months I think. I loved feeding so it wasn't that I wanted to stop but I had an eye on having a bit more freedom / going out for a whole day/evening and leaving DH in charge.

I replaced the mid morn feed with a bottle of formula first, then a week or so later I replaced the mid-pm feed with a bottle. So I think then I was just breastfeeding first thing in the morning, last thing at night and overnight (til I cut that out at 11 months or so, I probably could have done that sooner but I couldn't be arsed, it was too easy!).

Then I was going away for 2 nights when he was 13 months and by then I was just doing morn and evening anyway so DH gave him a bottle of cows milk in the morning and evening and we've been doing that ever since! My DS is 17 months now.

I also found 6 months the hardest bit - all the weaning hassle but before they dropped any feeds. She was feeding so regularly at the time - not at night, but every 1-2 hours in the day.

I thought I couldn't be away from her for any amount of time but actually at around 6 or 7 months I got so fed up with it, DP took her out one day with water and yoghurt instead and she went hours and hours without me happily and just had a big feed when she saw me again. Sometimes they are more adaptable than you think, especially if they are with someone else.

For me from 9 months onwards breastfeeding was really hassle-free and brilliant. At 10 months I stopped feeding in the daytime. At 14 months I stopped the night feed, but I'd been away for odd nights before then. It's not total freedom like I suppose it is formula feeding, but it's not always as restrictive as you think it has to be. And the cuddly feed when you see them again is lovely.

I continued feeding till 21 months, but I felt like I had my body back much earlier than that. From 12 months or so I was pretty much the same as pre-pregnancy with weight, body shape (including breast size and shape) and my fitness was decent again. I ditched the nursing bras for normal bras around 10 or 11 months and that helped me feel "myself".

These time scales probably seem quite long when your baby is 5 months, but just thought I'd share my experiences. At 4 months I planned to feed till 6 but no further as I was a bit fed up with it, but like I said, once I got to 8 or 9 months there was no looking back and I wouldn't have stopped at all if she hadn't got upset that my milk dried up with another pregnancy.

Thanks for all your input guys. I think I'm going to start dropping daytime feeds but keep breastfeeding in the morning and night.
I'm feeling slightly suffocated tbh. Also he has become very attached to me (which I do love) but DH and DM etc can't put him to sleep etc. TBH I think they would be able to but everyone seems to find it easier to just hand him to me when he needs a nap/feed. Which reduces the time I can be away from him.
So plan is today to teach DH how to put him to sleep and then on a few weeks try to reduce breastfeeds.
Apologise for rambling!

Well done for getting this far pretzel. I posted a similar thread the other day when it all got a bit much after 10 weeks!

My DD is not a quick feeder and last night took over an hour with the last feed...altho prob 30 mins comfort suckling. But like you id like her dad to be able to settle her too.

Good luck xx

I could have written this post-found the replies useful too! My DS is 7 months and I was just happy to get to 6 months bf really.

I've also been thinking about swapping a bf for a formula feed but still haven't bitten the bullet and actually done it. I just can't imagine he'll let me give him a bottle if I'm there (the milk lady!) but maybe I should leave him with someone and see how they get on with a bottle of formula.

I had got down to feeding 3 x a day- morning, 2pm and bedtime then someone said that was too little for a bf baby at this age and I felt all guilty and started feeding him more again! (I was of course replacing bfs with food) so now I do morning, half a feed (one side) around 10.30, 2pm full feed, 5pm a small feed if he's too hungry/agitated before dinner, then bedtime. So when do they drop more feeds? I really want to get down to just morning and bedtime soon.