advised to give formula

[VictoriaH]

My baby is now a month old (first baby). She weighed 6.7 at birth and now only 7.3, I've been told this is a very small increase and have to supplement breast feeding with formula. Am using Aptimal, started yesterday and she seems slightly more sick since. Is formula ok and has anyone else been advised to top up like this? my boyfriend is totally against me using formula and being very unsupportive but she needs to put on weight and obviously not getting enough from breastfeeding alone, he seems to think she should not need formula and that I should be capable of providing all she needs and am usless for not doing so. What can I do?

VictoriaH, I am going to bump you maybe someone else can help, but I know that it is not unusual for bf babies not to regain their birthweight by 4 weeks. Have you got a breastfeeding support group in your area, much more helpful that hv. Sorry to hear your not getting the support you need, you are not alone. Big hugs for you X

in some ways your boyfriend is right, babies dont need formula if breastfeeding is going well.

how long did it take for your dd to regain to her birthweight? dd1 was very slow to gain, in reality it was because my latch wasnt correct, but like you was told to give formula.

with dd2+3 i went to a different hospital who helped to get breastfeeding established, and was better supported.

I will keep this bumped so tiktok,mears or hunker see it and can offer better advice,

I'm no expert, and only managed to bf my dd for a couple of months but this sounds like bollox to me, sorry!
You shouldn't need to top up at all, is your dd weeing and pooing ok? Is she generally happy? settled? If yes then I'd personally ignore anyone that says to top up and keep on with the breastfeeding.
All babies are different, and as long as she seems happy I wouldn't worry about her weight at all

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Are you resting enough and eating enough yourself? She isnt losing weight. Is she content in herself or does she seem constantly hungry? Did she seem more 'settled' after the formula feed (other than being more sicky)? I would contact a bf counsellor and see if you can get any support. The NCT will have a list of your local ones.

Didnt really bf successfully myself so dont really have any good advice to give. sorry, but I know someone will be along who knows what they are talking about!

Meant to say also, if you are at all worried try to get to a breastfeeding support group who can advise you properly.

loads posted while I was typing! lol There! told you someone would come along!

Who has suggested that you should do this ? You don't have to give formula and it sounds like it may disagree with her or you are overfeeding her as a result. Could you use expressed breastmilk to top up if you are worried about not complying as this will help maintain your supply so that you can exclusively b'feed again if you want to. A breastfeeding counsellor could check that your baby is latching on effectively and give you some support.

Hi Victoria

Firstly, you're not useless, you're doing brilliantly and I'm sorry that your boyfriend is being so unsupportive. A few questions: is this the first weighing since she was born, and if not when were the others and what were the weights then? Secondly, are you getting plenty of wet and dirty nappies (5+ wet nappies and 3+ dirty ones)? What colour are her poos? Is her wee clear or dark yellow? Does she seem alert? How often is she feeding roughly? How did you feel that breastfeeding was going before this latest weighing?

From the weights you've given I would say that she's doing just fine but it would be interesting to hear the answers to those questions.

Grrr, whoever told ya this should be made to go to mandatory Breastfeeding training....grrr....complete rubbish!
Your lil one is gaining, you say, that is fine anyway!
I assume your lil one is happy enough in herself?
My only suggestion is to feed her whenever she squawkes and let her feed as long as she likes and try to only feed her on one breast until she unlatches herself, because that was she will get the calorific hindmilk!
You maybe also want to try the Rugby hold, as Baby's seem to find it easier to milk the breast in that position!
Breastfed Babys can gain weight slower, but often HV's etc...use the Weightcharts that are outdated and based on mainly FF Baby's.
exellent website with lots of bf info that you may find helpful
Breastfeeding positions, including a pic to show Rugbyhold
HTH

Actually, your boyfriend seems to know what he is talking about.

He could be a little more supportive and recognise your concerns and feelings, but I think he is thinking about the baby's welfare more than yours (probably not intentional).

Do you want to b/feed?

I think you need to see a breastfeeding counsellor to check that feeding is going Ok (in terms of latch etc) before anyone should suggest giving up breastfeeding. phone your midwife team & ask if there's someone with specialist knowledge or ring up La Leche League etc for someone who can talk you through it and arrange a face to face meeting.

I was also advised to top my baby up with formula as she hadn't regained her birthweight by almost 4 weeks. With hindsight I wish I'd got more advice about my latch and not been so bothered by weight gain and my hv's disapproval. I ended up giving up bf totally because she wouldn't feed properly from me once she'd started on a bottle.

If you are absolutely adamant that you want to bf then you need to stop giving formula, and just spend a few days really building up your supply by resting, eating and drinking and letting her feed as often as she wants. Also contact the NCT bf line that some one else metioned and get your latch checked, sometimes it only takes a tiny adjustment to make a huge difference to the way they feed.

Good luck.

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victoria, i would phone the bf helpline already offered.

first of all, does your baby have lots of wet and pooey nappies? a hard thing to judge as a new mom but it means say 6 changes a day due to wetness and poo. several poos a day is also a good sign.

how often is your baby feeding? is your baby is sleeping for more than 3 hrs at a stretch during the day and more than 5 hrs at night?

is your baby generally content after a feed?

so far you don't sound like you need to top up with formula. i was told the same thing at 2 weeks because my dd had not yet regained her birth weight. its just not true.

Running through the 'standard' questions...

How often is she feeding?
How often does each feed last?
Does she have plenty of wet nappies?
How often is she pooing?
How is she in herself -- happy, alert, sleepy, etc?
Have you seen a bf counsellor at all?
If so, what did they say about your latch?

Agree that the "supplement with formula" advice sounds a bit dubious to me. Formula has no more calories than breastmilk, so unless there are some special circumstances the advice ought to be tailored towards building up your supply before considering supplementing. Supplementing with formula will have quite the opposite effect and cause your supply to drop off.

General approach to building up supply -- strip off baby down to nappy, strip off yourself so far as possible, get lots and lots of skin-to-skin time and feed her loads.

Also, as pp have said, you should probably see a bf counsellor in case it's her latch that's the problem.

And some babies do just put on weight more slowly. I wouldn't assume that until you've worked on building up your supply and have checked out your technique, but sometimes that's all it is.

Hope an expert will be along soon.

Just to add on afgter reading Kiskidee's reply...about several poos or even one poo being a good sign...and of cause a poo is not a bad sign, but in a breastfed baby it really dopesn't mean anyhting even if they don't poo for a week...indeed it generally shows that the Baby is pretty good in converting all teh nutrients from the breastmilk into usable energy...iykwim!

It sounds a bit premature to go on to formula at this stage, unless there's something else going on. I'm no expert, but if there are plenty of wet and dirty nappies and she's waking for feeds then it sounds like there's no need to panic. Also if she lost weight then she's actually put on more than that. My ds2 was 4.58k at birth and now at 4 months is 5.94k, so he has only 'put on' 3 and a bit pounds, but he lost over a pound after birth, so has actually gained 4 and a half pounds or so which isn't huge but is significantly more.

Otherwise, lots of skin to skin feeding, and make sure she doesn't miss the night feeds yet as these make a difference to your milk supply, and take lots of time to feed her - don't shorten the feeds iyswim.

Hope tiktok etc will be along soon!

Helloooooo

Victoria, lots of encouragement on here....but some of the info is not quite right (though well-intentioned).

Firstly, regular frequent pooing is a very reliable sign that all is well. It is simply not correct that a breastfed baby in the first weeks does not 'need' to poo and can go as long as a week or more - this is fine after the first weeks, but in a baby of your baby's age and weight, I would be looking for several soft yellow poos every day as a sign enough is going in the top end.

Secondly, deliberately feeding on one side only is not a way of getting more calories into the baby. With a baby whose weight is causing concern, it helps to deliberately feed on both sides when you can...the more often milk is efficiently removed, the more milk is made. Please don't only feed on one side....try to feed on two sides (or even three!), following your baby's lead, by swapping when she seems to lose interest and stop sucking on one side.

Thirdly, the charts are not based on formula fed babies, but on babies whose feeding method is not differentiated. In any case, charts based on breastfed babies only show a faster weight gain in the early weeks.

I have no idea if your baby needs to take in more milk. Her weight might be fine for her. But if she needs more milk, you have more milk - in your breasts If she needs to gain weight, then feed her more often, especially at night. If she's feeding fewer than say, 8 times in 24 hours, there is scope for several more feeds.

You are absolutely not useless, but I do wonder about the uselessness of whoever has told you to supplement without exploring more about how to fix your breastfeeding.

There is a feeling among some HPs that it's ok to supplement if it's Aptamil. This is not a magic potion. It's a bog standard infant formula that is marketed to make it look different - it is heavily marketed at healthcare professionals and at mums who start off breastfeeding. Whoever has been caring for you has fallen for this marketing bollox, and needs to go on some in-service training urgently before they mess up more women's breastfeeding.

Ask whoever has advised you to supplement what they think of you simply feeding more often....and then reviewing the situation after a week or so of that.

Hope this helps

Victoria - tiktok has excellent advice.

I just wish to add that if you haven't contacted a local bf helpline or seen someone already with bf expertise (such as LLL, NCT, Baby Cafe, hospital drop-in-session, etc) please please do so if you wish to continue to bf.

I have to agree with your boyfriend on this one, "breast is best" and all that but please do get him to be more supportive because IMO it takes TWO parents to have a happy, healthy baby !

If you choose to continue bf, I think you will be doing your baby a lot of good. Be assured that you have enough milk to feed your baby and that if you wish to continue there are ways to make baby gain weight and be healthy on breastmilk ALONE, no need to give formula.

Please come back if you need some phone numbers of bf advisers who can look at baby's latch, weight gain, etc

bumping this for you, victoria....how are you doing?

Sorry about long post, tryed to shorten it but its a complicated problem....

I am in a similar position to Victoria, although my 5 week old dd lost weight this week I am exclusively breast feeding now but my HV has given us a week to try and sort things out before she thinks I should supplement with formula,

My dd was born weighing 7lb 9oz. I did introduce an evening bottle at 2 weeks as her weight was falling (7lb 3oz) and I wasn?t coping very well but she started to suffer terribly with colic so I went back to exclusive bf (she still gripes a little but is lots better in the evenings without the bottle) her weight which had crept up 7lb 15oz has now fallen by 2oz this week. We were feeding roughly every 3h during the day with a 5-6h gap at night. I was demand feeding and this is the schedule she settled into. Her poos had a green tinge when on formula, went yellow again when we swapped back to total bf but over the last couple of days are looking a browner shade of yellow. She also went a whole day without pooing. (Could have been due to running out of colief the day before) The poo was still soft when it finally came though. There have always been plenty of wet nappies.
Since I found out yesterday that her weight was not increasing I have tried to bring her feeds closer together and offer both breasts at each feed (wasn?t doing this before) I?ve only been trying this for 24h but it is really unsettling her to feed more often and she is no longer having what I consider to be good feeds. She falls asleep very quickly as if she isn?t really hungry. I keep waking her but she latches off a lot and the constant on and offing is making me very sore. It also makes the feeds take ages (up to an hour) which isn?t leaving her that long to digest the milk before I try again (and her tummy pains were back last night.)

Sorry to hijack but I could really use some advice as to whether or not I should be trying to force her to feed, and how long I should hold out against the bottle if her weight doesn?t pick up. I know I caved in too easily the first time and don?t want to go to the other extreme this time but I hate to see her in pain and the formulas seems to be the main cause of the colic.

Victoria ? I?m thinking of you and I hope you can sort things out without resorting to formula.

Happy to help, enteropy, but not here. You need to start another thread - your situation is very different from Victoria's.

I'm around, so post again with a new thread!