EBF baby feeding and sleeping habits - advice for new mum please!

[avocadoaddict]

Any advice/thoughts appreciated please - i'm not sure whether what i'm doing is for the best

I have a 9 week old dd. She is EBF and has put on weight really well since birth. However, during the day she doesn't feed every 2-3 hours (or whatever is considered normal!). She will grizzle because she's hungry and then just feed for a few minutes before detaching herself. I can't get her to feed any more, from the same breast or the other, but then she wants to feed again soon after. This happens regularly when she's awake during the day so sometimes she's grazing every 15-60 minutes rather than having a 'proper' feed. If I don't feed her straight away when she's hungry then she'll get upset very quickly!

She naps well during the day, three to four naps of 30-120 minutes. We don't have any kind of daytime routine for her as she's so young, we are just led by her.

She takes rantidine for silent reflux and this has worked really well. She's no longer uncomfortable and doesn't have any reflux symptoms so I don't think that this is the reason.

At night her approximate sleep times are 9:30pm to 1:30am, 2am to 4am and 4:30am to 7:30am. We can't get her to sleep earlier than that! She has large feeds during the night which is why she can go 2-4 hours without feeding. It's just during the day that this seems to be the problem. We have a bedtime routine of feed, bath, massage, feed again and into the cot. She normally drops off to sleep easily, but sometimes cries for 10-30 minutes

She's my first DC so I have no idea if i'm doing something wrong. Does anyone have any ideas please? Also, what do people think of her night time sleep patterns - is this normal for her age or is there anything else I can do to help her sleep longer?

Thanks in advance

I have also posted this in the sleep section

Night times sound pretty brilliant for a 9 week old! Do you leave her to cry for up to 30 minutes though?

Is the day time grazing a problem for you? To be honest it sounds like a pretty "natural" pattern for a young baby, and if she's content and gaining weight then it's only a problem if it's a problem for you.

Im not certain about the daytime, but you definitely dont need her to sleep longer at nighttime, thats completely normal! Could you ring a breastfeeding support person or get a lactation consultant to visit?

fledermaus I'm surprised about the night times! People always seem very keen to tell you that their 8 week old sleeps for 6 hours a night (or whatever!) so I wasn't sure what was normal!

I don't ever leave her to cry, as I know at night she's hungry. During the day when she cries I try all of the normal things - tired? hungry? wet? etc

The daytime grazing isn't a problem as such, but again, lots of people seem to feed every 2-3 hours so I thought that was normal too.

misspilly thanks! That's a good idea - there's a few organisations in my area that might be able to advise.

Sorry, I thought you meant when you put her to bed she sometimes cries for up to 30 minutes.

There's a massive range of normal. Some 8 week olds do feed every 3 hours and sleep in 6 hour stretches, lots don't though! I think something like half of babies sleep through by 7 months, so there's an awful lot that don't.

She's doing pretty well and it sounds fairly normal. Have you tried reducing stimulation and distraction during daytime feedings? Ds2 was a nosy little sausage and even at a really young age I'd have to be in a dim room with no mumsnet/kindle or other people for him to really focus, when I was out I'd have to drape him in a scarf to get any kind of feeding going at all.

Your dd sounds like she's getting herself into a good routine, if you have more concerns is also agree with pps that it can be worth checking in with a lactation consultant, especially one with an interest in reflux. Sometimes snacking can get into a vicious circle for refluxers because it eases discomfort in the short term but then causes ongoing low level reflux all day. But try the low-distraction thing first, perhaps!

Also wanted to ask like the previous person, is she crying for 10-30 mins in the cot before sleep, or with you? That's still quite a bit of time at that age.

Cross posted with your last one! The people who boast about long sleeps at night at this age are either (a) lucky (b) following very strict settling guidelines which tend to involve a certain amount of leaving tiny babies to cry alone (c) lying (d) about to get a very harsh shock when they hit the 4 month sleep regression, or (e) trying to sell a book to make money off exhausted and insecure first time mums You and she are doing a great job, and things will almost always settle down in the next few months.

There's certainly some things you can do at the edges to encourage sleep habits, like not always feeding to sleep, and having good routines, but anyone with more than 1 DC will always tell you that you suds lent realise how much is down to temperament and to physical things like reflux.

*suddenly not suds lent!

Oh sorry, yes I see what you both mean. The only time she's 'left' to cry (as such) is when we put her to bed for her first stretch of sleep at night, as we know the only reason is that she's overtired. But we don't leave her side, we sit with her until she drops off. I hope that makes sense. Sorry, sleep deprived brain . We have tried putting her to sleep earlier in the evening but she's just not tired. She goes from wide awake to crying and overtired extremely quickly...it seems - I may be mis-reading her signs!

I go straight to her when she cries for feeds during the night after her initial stretch of sleep.

custard I will try and make her day feeds as boring as possible. She feeds so well at night when it's dark and quiet (I don't talk to her at night either to keep everything really low key) so that might well help