Feeding discreetly without a shawl

[LouisaJF]

I'm going away with all of DH's family and we will all be in the same house. Usually at home I just BF openly and use a shawl for when in public or with company. However, DS doesn't like the shawl and it makes him hot and sweaty so I don't want to feed him like this all day, every day for a week.

Some members of the family won't mind, but not everyone wants to watch me feed, so how can I achieve this without shoving DS under something?

Personally, I think you should just get on with it as you usually do? However, only you know how your family will react, so have you tried the two vest trick? You wear two vests - you pull one vest up and one vest down, which just leaves one breast exposed and everything else covered.

I think if they don't want to watch you feed then perhaps they could not look whilst you're feeding? In the nicest possible way, it's their problem not yours. You have to feed your baby, they don't have to watch if they don't want to see.

I just know there will be a couple of male members of the family who will feel very uncomfortable. DH also thinks it's not fair to subject them to watching when they don't have a choice.

They do have a choice, if they don't want to watch they can leave the room.

Subject them to you feeding your child? Odd!
If it bothers you I used to tuck a muslin in my bra strap. Like a shawl but much lighter.

It depends what you wear. I used to wear loose t-shirts / shirts and pull them up. I occasionally had a muslin drapped over my shoulder, or over my tummy to hide the flab. No-one could see anything at all.

Louise I second the 2 vest trick pull one above your bra and one below they'll see less of you than an average summer dress would show. A cardy can also be useful.

Don't be too bashful the issue is there's not yours and often the people I thought would bother didn't turn a hair

They do have a choice. They can either look the other way or leave the room. It's not like you're demanding they sit and watch you is it.
I either use the two vests tops (pull top one up and bottom one down which hardly exposes anything), tuck a muslin in my bra strap so it drapes over just the top of DS's head, or I wear a loose top which has enough fabric to pull up one side and leave the rest of me covered.

I'd also support the two vest trick; however, if you can buy a new top, I would recommend these www.jojomamanbebe.co.uk/sp+breton-stripe-feeding-t-shirts-in-breastfeeding-tops-and-dresses+b4869

There is a flap which lifts up with a sort of curtain behind. It's super discrete.

When I stayed with my inlaws recently I found feeding DD as a fabulous excuse to retreat to our bedroom for half an hour - feed her, but of peace, read my book etc

Failing that, the two vest thing is a winner.

Two vests every time!
Another alternative is a nice summer weight shirt on top, worn open, so it covers the side view?

I know other people should just get over it, so it isn't necessary to be discreet, but unfortunately we aren't quite there yet in this country, better to bf with a cover than feel too uncomfortable and use a bottle.

I have a voluminous but very light scarf which doesn't make us hot - maybe an alternative to the shawl?

I just feed how I normally do wherever I am. One of my friends was chatting to her sister about BFing in public as she is expecting DC1 and was worried about it and I was really delighted that she said to her sister, "Dino just gets on with it and doesn't make an issue of it, so it just never is an issue for anyone." They can look away while you are latching on if they want and then it will just look like you are snuggling together.

Thank you! Looks like I'm going shopping for some new vest tops!

I know they should just get over it, but they are family and I'm sharing a house with them for a week. If I make them feel uncomfortable it won't do much for the atmosphere!

I used to go sit in a bedroom. Feet up, book or something to listen to on phone, at least 1/2hr peace and quiet. Ds would usually fall asleep so I could put him in the moses basket/travel cot.
I did vest, cardigan/zip up top to cover my sides, bump band to cover tummy and muslin held in my hand on my bust areaa to cover up anything else if ds decided to fling himself off and expose everything else.

Stick the telly on, give them something else to "watch".
Vest idea works really well; also a mumsnet scarf type thing is very light - don't have to put it over baby, can just cover your tummy/top of boob or whatever you think is visible.
Is be having serious words with your dh though.