Extended feeding and 50/50 care

[FushandChups]

I wondered if I could pick your brains.

DS is 2,5 and still loves his milk. However, I separated from my H over a year ago and we now share 50/50 care of both our DC. It was mentioned at pick up today that I should basically stop bf DS and I'm not sure what to do.

DS still asks every morning and night. He also asks during the day but I have tried to cut this out and offer him milk in a cup if he's really insistent. I ask him if he's getting milk as I wonder about my supply - he tells me he is.

So, my question is would you continue? DS gets a lot of comfort from it and it is a lovely way to end the day, for both of us. But H obviously thinks I should stop and whilst he no longer really has a say on what happens when the DC are with me, I wonder if he is right

I always said I would be led by my DC - DD made it very plain when she wanted to stop and I just don't believe DS is ready - he gets very upset if refused.

Now I've typed it out, I don't really know what I'm asking as I want to continue, I am pretty sure DS wants to continue but it's just H as always, making me doubt myself

At 2.5 your supply can cope with weird feeding patterns. It isn't interfering with XH's contact with DS, so really to my mind it's like his asking you not to give the children bananas when they're with you.

You could suggest going to "don't offer, don't refuse" if you're reasonably confident DS will continue to ask. I doubt it would make any change to how often DS feeds, but might make a change to how XH feels about it.

Thank you cabbage (great name )

That's a good way to say it, the banana thing - and it doesn't have any effect on his time with him, I don't think. I will check next time I drop off because if DS is getting upset when with H, perhaps it is time to nip it in the bud - so to speak.