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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Miscarriage and stopping breasfeeding within the last month.

6 replies

AvaLou · 01/09/2006 14:25

I had a miscarriage at 7 weeks 3 weeks ago, I know it's early but I already looked and felt very pregnant, it was our third baby and I ballooned in a similar way with my second.
It also coincided with me weaning DD who is 13 months, which was around the time we had planned to stop anyway. She spent a lot of time with family or DH as I couldn't care for the children in the aftermath and I now feel we almost forced her off the breast. It was far from the natural transition I hoped for, and like we had with DS and I am wracked with guilt over it.

I just couldn't bring myself to breastfeed her, as it seemed to stir up my already fraught hormones, and though she seems fine I cannot stop worrying that I was being selfish.
DH is against us going back to nursing, although I am still producing milk and feel I should to get back some kind of mothering feeling, which at the moment I seem to have totally lost.

I also feel guilty that I have spent a lot of time out with friends, and have used the nursery more often often than normal but some days I know they will do better job than me.

Today is one such example of how my mood switches, I had a great morning, then a few minutes ago a call from our health visitor to 'check up' ended with me in tears and I'm now feeling really low.
Are these feelings normal? I am wracked with guilt over the weaning and also that I am not grieving properly over the lost baby. I hate the feeling I get when I couldn't be further from maternal, and think back to just last month when I was pregnant and nursing , and able to do things with DS , and so much happier.

Sorry if this is long and a bit garbled, I'm not entirely clear what I am feeling.

OP posts:
Pamina3 · 01/09/2006 14:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CarlyP · 01/09/2006 14:36

if you want to feed dd agian then do it.

i had a m/c in march, and evne now its hard at times. like you, one call or meeting and i can go from a great day to hideous in 10 minutes.

i hope things ease for you. and dont feel guilty. you done what you had to do at the time.

cx

AvaLou · 01/09/2006 14:47

Pamina, thanks for your kind words, and congrats on dd3
It is hard isn't it, especially dealing with flippant remarks from family who say things like 'well the pregnancy didn't even get going' whatever that means?
I'm in turmoil, as I was happy to wean her before, and now she is happy not being bf I think we should leave it be.
I feel like starting breastfeding again might be for my own selfish reasons after what has happened, rather than whats best for all of us.
Plus we plan to ttc which will be much easier if she is weaned.

OP posts:
AvaLou · 01/09/2006 14:49

Sorry carly x posts, thanks, and sorry for your loss, are you ttc again?

I know it will get better and I am probably just a crazy hormonal wreck right now, hence I can't really explain anything well.

OP posts:
Pamina3 · 01/09/2006 14:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CarlyP · 01/09/2006 15:41

avalou,

i cant ttc again, i had to have an op which has left me infertile. but that was not due to the m/c.

i hope you find comfort with you ds. mine have helped alot.

cx

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