Going cold turkey on weaning?

[zuinthecity]

My dd is now 13 months and is still breastfed multiple times a day (and night:/). After a successful CC training when she was nearly 9 mo we had her asleep from 7 until 7 with no night feeds for about 2 months. Then we had a relapse of bad habits due to teething, travelling, moving houses, developmental leaps etc so for now our dd wakes up multiple times at night, screaming (crying is just not a word that describes that) and only breastfeeding or completely ignoring her will settle her again. The latter for just about 40 minus when she wakes up again. So we end up I with DD in our bed every night, when she nurses for hours on end waking up and then falling back to sleep multiple times. Back to crappy nights:/

We were supposed to all go visit DP's parents who live in a different country for 6 days soon but I just need a break from all that so I decided I'm not going. As DD is also going to daycare in 4 weeks for 3 days a week I think it's the best moment to stop breastfeeding altogether. So now, tell me, good idea? Bad idea? Why? Just going cold turkey with DP taking DD there, no breastmilk, no night sessions with mummy, no co-sleeping? First, should we start a few days before they're going (next week)? Or just do it in one go? And what can I do to better cope with the physical/emotional part of this? Should I extract at all? Anything I can do to lower chances of mastitis and pain and also the number of upset tears that I'm not feeding my baby anymore? Gee, I'm upset now just thinking about it:/

Thanks for any replies!

The problem with cold turkey if you're still feeding a lot is that you do risk mastitis, which (speaking from experience) is hideous, and possibly a massive hormonal PMT-style crash which some people find very unpleasant. 13 months is a great run and it sounds like you're ready to stop, but doing it slowly would be a lot easier on you/your boobs.

Do you have to finish by next week? My personal suggestion would be to tackle the night feeds first and then deal with daytime when you're all a bit more rested. It sounds like the night feeds are the most exhausting for you anyway. Also good to have your DP around to help with that and do lots of "daddy settling".

What's her solids intake like? Technically speaking she probably doesn't 'need' the milk she's getting all night (sounds like a comfort thing) and if it's affecting you then that's one to tackle first perhaps?

As for going cold turkey by her going away with your dh, she may well cope (not sure about your dh!) and just resume when she gets back to you. You'd probably need to express to relieve discomfort and avoid mastitis - and you might find when she gets back she is happy to stay off the boob (though with that level of comfort feeding at night, I'd be surprised tbh).

In the meantime, before they go away, you could work on night weaning again? Could you sleep in a different bed and leave dh to settle her for a few nights of hell ? Beaker of milk/bf at bedtime and then nothing until morning? Saying that, ds had 1-2 night feeds until 13/14 months (can't remember exactly) so there's only a problem if it's a problem for you, iyswim.

Hopefully some of that waffle made sense! Good luck whatever you decide.