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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Can't co-sleep- problem? Return of the pregnant worrier!

31 replies

squizita · 19/05/2014 10:07

I'm always on here worrying/fussing about feeding and still have a bump not a baby.

Latest worry: I have a mild sleep disorder which would make it unwise to co-sleep with DD once born. Basically I sleep in short 2-4 hour bursts and move A LOT in my sleep (not nightmares, just sometimes my muscles don't paralyse as they should). I have injured DH (bloodied his nose! Blush kicked shins often) in the past in my sleep.
Would not feel secure exposing a baby to this so planning on using a bedside crib.

Now worried that this will affect night feeds, whether BF or FF! Any reassurance? I'm sure as lots of women use them my baby will be OK but am paranoid.

OP posts:
NorahBone · 20/05/2014 17:48

It's not something I could have done, for different reasons to you, but it never occurred to me that it was a problem. As long as your baby will actually sleep in his/her own bed the ease of feeding is very marginal. I found it too uncomfortable to feed in/on the bed after giving birth and ds would need to be properly awake, so I used to change his nappy and feed him in another room. And if you did ff you'd have to get up anyway wouldn't you?

PastaandCheese · 20/05/2014 19:12

I haven't co-slept with either of my breastfed babies.

Each to their own but co-sleeping is not for me. They've each had a basket in my room before moving into a cot and we've all been perfectly happy with that.

ShoeWhore · 20/05/2014 19:26

Couldn't co-sleep with ds1 as dh was taking medication that made it unwise.

Ds2 had reflux so it wouldn't have helped and he needed the head end of the mattress elevated.

Found I didn't sleep well on the odd occasion we did have ds2 in bed. And both needed a nappy change at feed time or they leaked everywhere (often pooed mid feed when tiny too Grin ) couldn't get the hang of feeding lying down either.

Did co-sleep more with ds3 though, although still had to do that pesky nappy change...

cowbiscuits · 21/05/2014 13:11

Oh you don't have to co-sleep. I never co-slept, I was too anxious about it from a safety point of view in the early days. It wouldn't have worked for us. Our bed is too small, I'm always cold so I like my duvet up by my chin, and I hate sleeping on my side.

We didn't have a side cot, just a normal moses basket a foot or two away from the bed. I started with the basket right next to my bed but I got sick of having to climb round it to get in and out. and I couldn't pick him up from the angle I was at without sitting up and moving my body round anyway. So I'd just step out, scoop up DS and then sit up in bed with him until he'd finished. I'd be propped up on pillows. Maybe I got less sleep than co-sleepers but I managed ok. It's different for everyone, some sleep better than others. At the worst point he was up maybe 5 times a night but mostly until he was about 6 months and moved into his cot, it was about twice a night, and he'd go back to sleep quite quickly.

I know a lot of very pro-bf, attachment parenting, babywearing, BLW type people who all co-sleep like and maybe it's just me being awkward but I felt a bit like it was expected in these circles, as if you were abandoning them by having them a couple of feet away in a basket. Which is nonsense.

We do bring him into our bed when he wakes in the early morning for a couple of hours though.

Original poster
squizita · 21/05/2014 16:42

I know a lot of very pro-bf, attachment parenting, babywearing, BLW type people who all co-sleep like and maybe it's just me being awkward but I felt a bit like it was expected in these circles, as if you were abandoning them by having them a couple of feet away in a basket. Which is nonsense.

Yes this is what I think worries me. It's so intimidating to a regular Joe like myself!
It's quite intimidating this 'all or nothing' approach (and some people look blankly and act like it doesn't exist, which makes me think I'm even more stupid).
I wonder how this influences 'normalising breastfeeding', the idea that it comes in a package with a whole lifestyle so if you're not the right class/style/personality you're not good enough ... but if I wonder out loud, I get scared that those very same people will think I'm anti or something!

OP posts:
JustPretending · 22/05/2014 10:49

Squizita yes, we have the NCT bednest. Love it, wish we'd bought it. It flat packs for taking on hols in the car & has decent resale value.

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