To give 15 day old some formula

[EST0106]

Basically I have spent most of the afternoon in tears, I'm exhausted, I have a ranging temperature (38.8) and feel rubbish. I got some antibiotics from the out of hours docs last night who says I have a uti.

My baby was born weighing 9.5lbs and at 10 days weighed 10lb 2, but he feeds constantly, if he's not feeding he's screaming his head off, he does settle for naps when he's finally had enough though. During the night he goes about 1.5 hours between feeds and each feed takes about an hour at least. I know all this is normal, I probably had it with dd but have blocked it out!

I have a nearly 3 year old and all I seem to say to her at the moment is 'in a minute' and then she gets upset and I feel so sad. I'm sure it's just because I feel so poorly but I'm really worried about DH going back to work on wed, how will I entertain her if I'm permanently attached to the sofa? I'm wondering about giving him a bottle of formula so at least DH can help a bit. I bf dd exclusively until she was about 5 months so feel really shit abut considering this but I'm not sure now much longer I can keep it up. Crying again, god I'm being pathetic!

Do you think I should just stick it out?

A couple of bottles of formula isn't the end of the world or indeed bfing. I've been as upset as you about giving a few top ups in the early days but have gone on bfing until 1+

They both need you well so if you need to sleep then do it and get well soon.

It sounds like you're having a really rough time. What's up with the fever? Are you taking anything for it?

How do the feeds feel? How often is your baby pooping, per day?

I will probably get flamed for this on here

At 3 weeks I had had enough of ds constantly feeding/screaming and I gave him a bottle of formula, I never looked back, I also had a 2 year old and dp had gone back to work. I mixed fed for a few weeks but eventually stuck with formula which was totally my choice and I have no regrets.

You have to do what feels right for you and your baby.

(I've never seen anyone flamed for a post like yours, ClaimedByMe - don't fuel the myth that people get flamed for describing their use of formula. It doesn't help....:()

OP - no one can tell you to stick it out! No one can tell you to give formula. All anyone can do, or should do, is to support you and help you work out your options and your feelings about them. You sound quite poorly, to be honest - sounds like your DH could usefully ask for time off beyond wednesday, as caring for 2 very small children alone when you are feeling as rubbish as you are will not feel brilliantly easy in just 2-3 days time. Is that possible?

Would it clarify things for you if you knew you had him at home for another week (ie he goes back a week on Monday)?

Thanks for the support. I've been back to doctors today and they think it's a kidney infection so I have some different antibiotics which should kick in soon, hopefully! DH has rang his work and is taking wed off but can take off more if needed, DD is at nursery on thurs anyway so not such a full on day.

I have been and brought a couple of bottles, getting the steriliser out the loft in a bit and think I'm going to try and express some milk, I did buy a carton of formula too though. Just hope he takes a bottle now!

Thanks again.

Good luck, OP :)

It's great your DH is able to stick around.

Well done for persevering for so long. Has your baby been checked for tongue tie? His birth weight shouldn't necessarily make him a hungry baby but his long feeds and screaming can be symptoms of tongue tie.
Don't forget that many mums have more luck with hand expressing than using a pump so don't despair if you don't get much milk.
Hope you're feeling better soon

Good luck EST...
Although its a bit of a haze now I do remember some really low points in the early days and I didn't have an infection to deal with - so you are doing better than me already!
If you can express then great - I found it best to express while feeding in the mornings - so DD on one boob, pump on the other one.
Also I had a few cartons in and if I didn't have any expressed milk ready or was just shattered then I would use them. Limited myself to 1 carton a day so there was no (or minimal) impact on my own supply and when all was settled down I could go back to just breastfeeding.
Nows the time to call in favours - even if you are the kind of independent person that doesn't ask for help this is the time that you should do it. I found it easiest to actually give specific tasks - e.g. take this pile of laundry for me, can you make us some dinner, cuddle the baby so I can have a shower, we need this shopping list from the supermarket, etc.
Your older DD will cope - its just short term and hopefully once your new baby is a little bit older and interactive you'll have a willing playmate/little helper.