Just wondered - would you breast feed a friend's baby??

[clairemow]

Just been having a conversation with a friend - would you be happy breast feeding someone else's baby, and how would you feel if someone else offered to feed yours?

I was thinking of the sort of scenario where you've had to leave your baby with someone else, and they need a feed, like if you're really sick or something.

I don't think I'd have a problem with it either way tbh.

[lanismum]

no, i wouldnt breastfeed a friends baby, and i wouldnt want my baby to have another womans breastmilk straight from the source, i would let my baby have donated milk though.

[VeniVidiVickiQV]

Oh well done piffle.

I would. Quite happily. I would let someone feed my DS too. Someone I knew and trusted though.

Hunker, I'd happily have your DS2 for a night or 3

[Gobblunarcharsky]

'Well, no, saying that the decision between feeding a child formula milk and breast milk "doesn't make much difference" is quite a statement IMO.'

Only if you honestly think that the outcome for that individual child is going to be signficantly different depending on how they are fed. Which I don't.

[Greensleeves]

That's what I was asking - do you really think there is virtually no substantive difference between feeding a child formula and feeding it breast milk? I think you've answered!

[Gobblunarcharsky]

'If I wasn't sure how the mum would react, I might just have kept quiet though.'

And I think that is disgraceful.

[Greensleeves]

Yes I don't much like that either. That is wrong IMO.

(I haven't got the stomach for another breast/bottle humdinger either, GDG)

[Beetroot]

when I lived abroad it was common for whoever was around the slap the child to her breast. Ilived in a remote community and hte women and men had to go tend the fields and hunt for animals and they left a couple of nursing mothers OR grandmothers who would feed the babies...

So yes I would have if it was necesary

[littleducks]

i have a dd and would happily feed my niece and often tease my sil that she should feed my dd if there was ever an emergency but i dont think i would feed a boy, because i never have but maybe if my niece was a boy (iyswim) i would feel differently.
Religously we believe that children fed by the same women become 'milk' bro and sis to each other and cannot marry. So i could not donate milk or give dd donated milk. If i knew who my milk was going to i would pump for a friend or poorly baby but i would only actually breastfeed a relative, i think. But if a baby refuse a bottle of ebm maybe i would....

[Greensleeves]

What religion is that, littleducks? Just interested

[lanismum]

< whispers > but what about the possible risk of infection?

[Judessis]

Piffle - you're amazing!!!
Frogs - baby's of mum's who drink cow's milk have been exposed to the protein.....my sister had to hav soya milk while bf as her 2nd ds was intolerant of cow's milk..
I think the point being made is that formula milk is not arsenic, and those of us who weren't able to bf sometimes feel a little got out (have you met my HV???!!!)for not bfing!! And therefore sometimes if you are unable to feed a bottle of formula is a better option than no food...
And in answer to the q, if I was able to I would do for a close friend/family member but had major problems with feeding DS (now 2) and think relactating (even if to help out SIL's impending twins) is slightly unlikely!!

[Gobblunarcharsky]

Basically I think the 'emergency' situation should be agreed in advance if possible (I know that's kind of a contradiction in terms!). So in the babysitting example, I'd have thought about the possibility of the baby waking and being inconsolable and agreed with the mother a course of action. I'd no more breastfeed someone's baby without permission than I would formula feed a breastfed baby without permission. It's too important an issue to many people.

Of course in Piffle's situation it's entirely different and I think if I was her friend I'd be nothing but grateful. If a friend did the same while babysitting and I wasn't far away, I'd be livid if it wasn't agreed.

[littleducks]

I'm muslim, and breastfeeding is seen as very important (if possible if not whole different matter) and is encouraged for two full years, breastfeeding another womans child carries alot of reward as well but i dont think is very common now days, but on the other is prob a bit taboo and not talked about if it is done.

[staceym11]

having wished to breastfeed and failing miserably i wish someone would have been able to feed dd for a few days at least to just give her as many anti bodies as pos.

i would never have a problem with doing this for someone elses lo if they agreed, in an emergency it would just be human nature!

well done piffle, what a great friend you are!

[Beetroot]

oh really beetroot how interesting!

[lanismum]

nobodys answered me either

[mellowma]

Message withdrawn

[Joolstoo]

good point gobble (well, I would say that ) about feeding a bf baby formula in an emergency - but what you do if say (off she goes into dreamland)

if

a breastfeeding friend came round with some ebm and you dropped it (or summat!) and all you had was

someone might have a beef about that!










Aptimil

[Piffle]

infection lanis from what?
I had HIV/Hep tests with both my pregnancies...

[lanismum]

so did i piffle, but just because a woman is negative for hiv/hep in pregnancy, doesnt mean that she necessarily will be months later, i know its a teeny chance, just not one i would feel comfortable with.

[FrannyandZooey]

I would like it to be more the norm to do this. Imagine how much easier it would make life? I understand that in Australia it is fairly common, I don't mean that everyone is doing it - but that it's certainly not unheard of amongst groups of mothers.

I would have no problem bfing a friend's child myself, but don't know how I would have felt about someone else bfing ds when he was younger. I might have felt jealous, or might have been fine. I have been in a situation where bottle feeding mother has been caught out without any milk and baby is screaming (one time we were stuck in traffic and all 4 of us in the car were getting pretty distraught). I felt it was fairly ridiculous that I couldn't just give the baby what he needed (my milk was letting down like mad anyway ) but I would never have offered. I don't think it would have been well received.

[Piffle]

well it would be for me lanis as I never any further sexual encounters since I found out I was pregnant until DS was nearly 2, as I split with ex then. He was HIV - and tested every 3 mths as he was a blood donor as was I. (less common in demand blood group)

[Piffle]

I was in New Zealand at the time
Where it was also ok to breast feed your baby ANYWHERE without ignorant nincs coming up and setting police and glares on you.

[cowmad]

just came across this... cant belive this!!no i definatly would not eewww!!!geroff

[nicnack2]

dont think i could physically feed another nor allow mine to be fed. with ds1 had so much milk could have fed hordes of babies, unfortuately no longer allowed to donate to scbu due to cross infection/morales and ethics.