Newborn breastfeeding misery

[Ladyflower]

Hi, I wonder if there is anyone out there who can help!?
DS is 4 days old and an absolute joy, however the BFing is not going fantastically smoothly. I 'm trying to feed him at least 3 hourly and more often if he needs it. Day time is fine. I often have to wake him and change nappy then get him to feed but he is pretty settled. But at night he feeds continuously - tonight he fed constantly from midnight until 4 and although I think the latch is OK (midwife checked it) after that length of time my nipples and boobs are agony and he still wants more.... Think screaming but with a nipple in the mouth! I gave in tonight and gave him a bottle of the emergency formula which I don't want to repeat as I know it will affect my supply.
I'm not 100% sure that my milk has come in yet. Boobs are a little sore but feel fairly soft.
The other problem is that the long hours of feeding the last 2 nights have given me excrutiating neck and shoulder pain. I'm sat well in a chair (one of those Ikea jobbies) but just can't get comfortable. I now can't sleep because of the pain and will try and get a sports massage this week if I can leave DS with DH for 30 mins.
Any suggestions?
My plan is to not give any more formula once my milk is properly in, get a la leche leader for advice re positioning and whether latch is right.
Anything else I should be doing (other than sitting back and giving into the cluster feeding with a cool drink, cake and the box set of game of thrones!)
I'm trying to approach it rationally but it's difficult!

First, I'm afraid constant feeding is quite normal for long periods in the first couple of weeks. It WILL get better. Have you a breastfeeding pillow? If not, get one or use normal pillows on your lap to support baby while you feed. Giving yourself a sore back doesn't make things any easier. I have a "my brest friend" one and it is great, very supportive but much cheaper 2nd hand off ebay (chuck the whole thing in the wash with the cover still on and hang above a radiator to dry if you are worried about 2nd hand being clean). Lots of lansinoh cream for nips in between sessions. Try to catch up on sleep when baby does during the day, forget housework, cooking or guests for a few days. It's much easier to deal with if you are rested. Congratulations on your baby, it will be very tough for a couple of weeks then it gets much easier. The kellymom website is a great site for explaining and reassurance during the "I must not have enough milk moments" - read about growth spurts.

Also if you're sore look up lying down feeding and "biological nurturing" positions - they may be more comfortable

I have bf 2 babies and with dc1 I had similar concerns, but really it is all normal. Your baby is trying to increase your supply, probably with a growth spurt, if you stick at it he will go through a few of these all normal. With both mine my nipples had to go through a toughening up period, maybe for a week or two.

I spent the first week trying to find positions to feed that was most comfortable. If your shoulders are tense it can affect let down, plus you end up with a bad back.

If you want to carry on bf, try and resist ff. Your breasts need the stimulation from your baby, and although some women do mix feed I think it can be hard to get right. I also always asked my midwives, HV, well meaning relatives if they ever bf. Sometimes you get contradicting advice and although I'm not a trained expert, with my 2nd DC I'm more confident in taking things with a pinch of salt. You are most likely not starving your baby, and their tummies are small so need lots of feeds.

Also with dc1 my dh who didn't understand the crying all the time and constant feeding was normal, and neither did i, thought he was doing the right thing by suggesting ff as one offs. It took longer to build my supply up.

DC2 slept all day and fed all night. Even now at 6 months he has been awake since 4am giggling. Some babies seem nocturnal, but you do get used to it. I find co-sleeping a God send, but I found it hard when they were little newborns, but maybe try feeding laying on your side? This may help your back too, I stick a pillow behind me for extra support.

Good luck!

Sorry you're having a hard time. Firstly, sleeping during the day and waking at night is perfectly normal for the first couple of weeks. DS will eventually work out what night is for!

It sounds like your milk is just coming and baby is hungry. Hopefully all that feeding will have stimulated milk production and he'll get what he needs without feeding for too long. Keep your eye in the latch, during a feed it is easy for the position to change and this will make you sore (and feeding less efficient).

During the day time try to work on comfortable feeding positions. I found a feeding cushion really helpful as it supports baby so you don't have to.

Lack of sleep is dreadful so don't be too hard on yourself. Good luck.

My milk came in on about day 4 and the night before was hell! He's probably just hungry and once your milk is there it will get easier.

Same problem here. My 3.5 weeks old sometimes feed for three hours or more. At night it was torture sitting on chair, so uncomfortable and tiring. Now after an hour I take him in bed with me at least I get some rest while he is sucking away!

Please, please, please practice feeding lying down. It's just a life changer, honestly. Once you can do that, you can deal with anything.

Yes I second (third?) lying down breastfeeding and co-sleeping. You'll get much more rest that way. I'm feeding DD in bed as we speak

Same here with the lying down. I remember my nipples being very sore for the first couple of weeks even though Ds was latched on correctly but they soon toughened up, believe me after a week or so your milk will build up and your Ds won't need to feed for as long.........Also you will have a pair of boobies that will put Pamela Anderson to shame