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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Advice needed for sudden weaning - possible hiv exposure risk

70 replies

HeartbrokenAndTerrified · 02/08/2006 08:05

i've changed my name for this.

I've discovered that there is a chance that I was exposed to hiv about a week ago. from what i've been able to find out so far (talking to terance higgins trust) if i was my chances of infection are low (

OP posts:
Pixiefish · 02/08/2006 08:07

how old is she?

gothicmama · 02/08/2006 08:09

How old is she, does she use acup for water, avent teats are very good as they use similar motion to breast feeding, the advice I was given was use what you feel comfortable with SMA (altho morally a bit unsound is good)
I hope you get good news and feel you are probably doing the best thing fo ryour daughter in stopping feeding

NotQuiteCockney · 02/08/2006 08:12

I think the current advice for bf + hiv is, bf is best, until your child starts taking any solids or formula. Once they start taking anything else you must stop bf immediately.

I don't know how quickly the virus comes through into milk.

If you want to talk about how you were exposed, you can.

wilbur · 02/08/2006 08:16

I'm so very sorry to hear this, what an awful situation for you. How long will it be before you know if you are okay? I don't suppose you would be able to express while waiting and return to b'feeding once any uncertainty had passed? At least that might keep up your supply (if you want to) although heartbreaking to throw all that milk away when you are enjoying feeding your dd. Well done for feeding her this far though, and I'm sure she will continue to thrive on formula. After I weaned my lot, I used Aptamil formula (someone told me it was a high quality one - hope that's true!). It didn;t upset any tummies at least. Also used avent bottles - they're easy to clean. If she's approaching one though, I would just persevere with the cup with maybe a bottle at bedtime.

Blu · 02/08/2006 08:25

HB&T -so sorry.

From quick googling, the trasmission rate from bf of mothers who are known to be affected is between one in eight, and one in four, with boys and children of mothers with a very advanced condition being more susceptible.

But this is something best disussed with a professional - do the THT have a bf counsellor or someone you can talk to?

Wilbur's idea sounds a good one - it would perhaps give you something to look forward to if all is well.

Original poster
HeartbrokenAndTerrified · 02/08/2006 08:35

Thanks for your responses. i feel so isolated - i don't want to talk to any friend in rl about this

she's 10 months. i'm worried that she'll think i don't love her anymore at the moment she feeds loads overnight (we cosleep from about 2am usually). this is going to be a massive, abrupt change for her - is there any way of making it easier?

am i going to get engorged? perhaps you're right wilbur - i could express - i've never really been very sucessful, but i could hire one of those big pumps i suppose? does anyone have any experience of starting to express so late?

i've just spoken to a lovely nurse at our local hospital GUM clinic. she was very reassuring but also suggested expressing for peace of mind until test results are clear.

thanks again

OP posts:
flack · 02/08/2006 08:41

You could freeze the expressed milk until you got the all-clear. Even if she won't take to the breast again, she would get some more of your goodness after all.
Abrasions from solids in the mouth make HIV transmission more likely which is why babies on solids need to wean immediately.
I would try her with formula in a cup or a sippy cup, getting bottles clean is hard. Good luck.

Original poster
HeartbrokenAndTerrified · 02/08/2006 08:42

meant to say - i've got an appointment this afternoon to get more detailed advice (and tests, i think).

i'm scared i've already risked dd's health

i'm so sad to be losing our bf relationship, i'd wanted to keep feeding past a year - i'm going back to work soon and i thought having morning and bedtime feeds would be comforting and reassuring for her and for me

thanks again.

OP posts:
flack · 02/08/2006 08:43

You need to take advice on how long it takes for HIV to be detectable in the tests, it might not just be a week, might take up to months (I don't really know for sure, you need to ask).

FanjoFanjoWhosGotTheFanjo · 02/08/2006 08:46

How long is it until you can get an all-clear test?

You will want to express, at the very least to reduce engorgement and prevent mastitis.

Original poster
HeartbrokenAndTerrified · 02/08/2006 08:47

yes - it's 3 months for the usual hiv antibody test, although the tht helpline (who were wonderful) said there's an antigen test which can give results much sooner, but i don't know if that's available here.

i'm really glad i've made an appointment - at least i feel like i'm doing something. the hiv nurse said she'd try to get me a pump.

OP posts:
Original poster
HeartbrokenAndTerrified · 02/08/2006 08:47

yes - it's 3 months for the usual hiv antibody test, although the tht helpline (who were wonderful) said there's an antigen test which can give results much sooner, but i don't know if that's available here.

i'm really glad i've made an appointment - at least i feel like i'm doing something. the hiv nurse said she'd try to get me a pump.

OP posts:
FanjoFanjoWhosGotTheFanjo · 02/08/2006 08:47

If you want to keep bf up, you can, I'd just find out how long it will be until you can get a definative all-clear, to figure out how long you'd need to express for.

flack · 02/08/2006 08:57

They sell pumps cheap on Ebay (go for the newest version Avent Isis you can). Good luck. Maybe it will console you to remember that at least you managed 10 months, a lot of mothers aren't that lucky.

tiktok · 02/08/2006 09:07

Heartbroken - nothing to add to this except my support and encouragement to get as much info as you can. The whole biz of HIV transmission and breastfeeding is complex and changing but the THT sound as if they are on the ball...can you get clearer stats than less than one in 1000, I wonder? Is this figure the equivalent of saying 'vanishingly rare', possibly?

It's so sad, and it's a tribute to you as a mum you are more worried about your little girl than yourself.

It just seems to me to be so massively unlikely - you say there is a 'chance' and that you were 'exposed' to HIV, neither of which necessarily adds up to much. I absolutely understand that you don't want to take any risks at all, of course....I hope it all works out.

Kiskidee · 02/08/2006 09:22

MAM teats fit avent bottles. they are more expensive but softer. younger bf babies I found take to these better than avent teats. find them in mothercare & boots.

thinking of you and wishing for the best

DollyP · 02/08/2006 11:30

Thinking of you heartbroken... remember you have fed your lovely daughter for 10 months so she has got a great start even if you don't feed her any more. I hope that THT can give you more information and support.

Take care. X

Original poster
HeartbrokenAndTerrified · 02/08/2006 11:42

thanks for your supportive words. they really help.

i've bought a couple of cartons of sma gold to offer her today - there are so many formulas to choose from. should she be having follow on milk or just normal or hungry baby? the ingredients look so disgusting i know they're fine and she'll be fine but this just so isn't what i wanted to do.

how can i help her feel ok about not bf anymore? i'm dreading tonight - i'm worried she'll be hysterical. she has been in the past when i haven't been available when she's woken in the night. she's never gone to bed in the evening without a bf she's teething as well, so she's quite fretful at night anyway.

oh god. and i feel this terrible just about the weaning - i'm not even thinking about the hiv issue.

thanks

OP posts:
CorrieDale · 02/08/2006 11:45

If you want my Avent ISIS pump, I'd be more than happy to pack it up and send it to you. Horrible horrible situation for you and I really hope the tests are negative.

CorrieDale · 02/08/2006 11:46

Do you have a partner? Can he help with night-weaning? Otherwise, wear plenty of clothes tonight to bed and give her loads and loads of cuddles.

Chandra · 02/08/2006 11:48

I would have thought that the advice of continue to BF was for extreme situations where baby is more likely to die of a gastroenteritis than of being infected with HIV.... but as NQC, I'm not sure.

I will try to find something in the subject, how old is your baby? Have you talked to HV?

Heathcliffscathy · 02/08/2006 11:50

HBAT: all good advice on here, just wanted to add a few words of support. i echo the poster that said that you were placing all the emphasis on your daughter, and that demonstrates what a loving and caring mother you are, but are you ok? sorry, that's a stupid question, what i'm trying to say is please try to find some RL support for yourself too. and post on here for support for yourself if you can.

Chandra · 02/08/2006 11:51

Found this, I believe it may help:

FAQ Breastfeeding and HIV

Chandra · 02/08/2006 11:55

More here

albatros · 02/08/2006 11:55

There is an antidote available to HIV usually just healthcare workers are able to get it (or police, public sector workers etc) because it is expensive it has to be taken / started quite soon after the possible infection, get in touch with your GP ASAP and see if they will let you have it
Good luck