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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

So fed up :o(

6 replies

ems1910 · 31/01/2014 10:33

DS is 7 weeks old and ebf. All going well, was a very constant feeder but now settled down into a nice 2 hour daytime routine. He has cluster fed every night since week one (with two nights off from it when he slept). All fine. I'm exhausted and feel I've missed lots of the first 7 weeks but all to be expected.

But now he is using me a dummy. Pretty sure he isn't cluster feeding anymore as there is no swallowing, it's a different kind of suck. Last night was awful and I cried lots (I also wrote a rather long post here but deleted as it was incoherent!) He won't take a dummy, we have tried since about three weeks old. Have tried different brands/shapes. Tried a slumber buddy and rocking his moses basket which helps in the day sometime but no settling.

I am borrowing a breast pump today from a friend so hoping to express enough to mean OH can give him a bottle and see if this then helps him take a dummy but I feel a failure for doing this :o(

I feel like an awful mummy for trying to get him to stop comfort sucking on me but it's starting to get me down. It's all night from about 6 until the morning when we get up, then he settles in his pram on the school run and sleeps for a couple of hours. No naps in the day except a couple of ten minute ones after his feeds. As soon as he is moved he cries.

I am starting to dread the evenings. Last night I sat in my bedroom, OH with him, in the dark with his slumber buddy on for 4 hours just trying to get him to settle without my breast. OH on nightshift. I was in tears, he was upset (but not too much as I couldn't do it to him and let him suck everytime). I know it is only for such a short time and I should be happy I can ebf and have such a lovely bond with him, he is lovely when he is well fed and will settle for anyone, smiles etc.

Any tips on getting him to settle without my breast? Or will it pass soon?
E x

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moonblues · 31/01/2014 10:42

Sorry you're having a tough time. Babies often have a growth spurt around 6/7 weeks and seem to want to feed constantly. It usually takes a couple of days for your supply to catch up and then it settles down again. So you might find he's a lot more settled tomorrow.

I've never been very good at getting my babies to settle without feeding them when they were that size... DH was better, I think because he didn't smell of milk, though having them over my shoulder or facing away from me sometimes worked. Good luck!

ems1910 · 31/01/2014 10:49

That last line, he is lovely all the time, I just meant settles better. Not saying I don't think he is lovely!

Thank Moon :) He fed lots on Sunday which I thought could be the 6 week growth spurt. I have read that cluster feeding sometimes doesn't stop until 3 or 4 months either but he doesn't seem to be feeding. I was full this morning even though he was on me an hour before :/

He will happily sit on OH for a bit, just cuddling up but after a while he cries until I put him on my breast.

This is all such a learning curve for me, I ff my first. I can't help thinking I have done something wrong.

Thankyou x

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worldgonecrazy · 31/01/2014 10:54

DD didn't want to take a dummy. My OH had a trick of putting it in her mouth and then gently tapping it with his finger nail. For some reason, it made her take the dummy. After a few minutes she got the hang of it.

Also, when it gets too bad, get someone to take him, go and eat some chocolate cake, and if it's the evening, have a small glass of wine. It will make you feel more human and less like a milk machine.

ems1910 · 31/01/2014 10:58

World, I will try the tapping dummy...and the cake! Thankyou! x
OH is here tomorrow night so he is going to attempt to settle without me in the room. In the day I can sometimes get away with rocking him in the bouncer and he sleeps for half an hour.

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Starballbunny · 31/01/2014 11:08

I just watched TV with subtitles and co-slept. Dummies are just more hassle.
You worry if they are clean and the baby wakes every 5 minutes wanting them stuck back in.

ems1910 · 31/01/2014 11:11

Oh subtitles are a great idea! See, these are the kind of tips I needed.

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