Is formula really the magical solution I think it will be?

[Slh122]

I have a 9 day old baby and I'm getting about 2-3 hours sleep on a night.
He settles fine in his Moses basket during the day, feeds every 2-3 hours.
He goes to bed when we go to bed about 11.30 pm then wakes up around 2.
He then feeds constantly till around 7 or 8 am. If he falls asleep on my boob I lay him in his Moses basket and he screams and starts rooting until I feed him again. Repeat constantly.
I can't do it anymore. I feel like leaving him in his crib to cry.
A few people have told me their baby slept longer on formula. Is it true?

Now all the guilt has come flooding back thanks to your post. Thanks alot.

My ds, now 18 months, used to feed for hours and hours and was a terrible sleeper. He lost a lot of weight at first so I mix fed for a couple of months. I then went on to exclusively bf until he was 14 months. Mix feeding can be really handy at first when they are tiny and you're worried about what they are getting and I had no nipple confusion or problems with the bottle. Unfortunately it didn't seem to make a difference to his sleep and I just learned to cosleep and feed lying down. So although I think there's good reasons to top up with formula if your baby clearly isn't getting enough on BM alone, it's not the magic bullet (well wasnt for me) when it comes to sleep.

Lj- please don't feel guilty. You've done nothing wrong. It's far better to enjoy formula feeding than to feel under so much pressure to breastfeed that it takes the enjoyment away from those early days with your baby. It really isn't anything to feel guilty about.

There is an incredible amount of pressure on mums to breastfeed and it is such a small part of overall parenting. It's nice if you can do it and want to do it but honestly no one is going to give you a medal either way whichever you choose.

Don't let anyone make you feel bad.

LJ8893 no one else is responsible for your feelings, the OP asked for information about breast feeding.

If you feel so sensitive about the subject avoid these threads.

Lj8893

"I switched to ff at about day 5, and instantly it was like I had a different baby. I think ff was the best thing I did for my baby and for myself."

Make up your mind ffs. You have jumped from it being the "best thing" to feeling guilty.
well it's your choice to feel that way- but don't try to persuade others to give up breastfeeding to salve your guilt.

Ummm the thread title is about formula feeding.

I didn't think I still felt sensitive about it anymore, my dd is now 3 months and I haven't had an negative attitudes toward my ff her until atthestrokeoftwelves post which quite frankly wasn't very polite. And was bound to make even the most hard nosed person feel slightly sensitive.

fairylea- I have plenty of empathy for the OP and given constructive advice- none for you however as you are happy to sing the benefits of formula it doesn't sound like you need any sympathy.

I am not trying to persuade anybody!!!!!!! The OP asked if formula feeding was the magic solution, I was just saying that for me it was the magic solution but it did come with a side order of guilt. (And mild pnd)

Don't get me wrong, when I have another dc I will attempt bf again as I was so hoping to bf for at least a year. But it didn't work for us this time.

It's a choice only you can make, OP. Women need to choose the way of feeding their babies that works best for them and their families.

Remember though, once you make the switch, it's difficult (although not impossible) to go back. Only offer formula if you are at peace with your decision to stop breastfeeding.

There's a chance it will make a difference, there's a chance it will make no difference at all, and there's a chance that your baby will change patterns soon, so no matter what you do, things will get better.

That's fine atthestroke, you're right I don't need sympathy. And I'm not ashamed to say that formula really made a difference to how quickly I recovered from severe pnd and also to my bond with my baby because I wasn't doing something I didn't enjoy anymore.

I wish someone like me had come along when I was struggling and feeling down and said it's okay to switch to formula, it doesn't make you any less of a mum and it doesn't mean you've failed. Because that's how I felt and I could have done with hearing that, to give a balanced view alongside the many, many persuasive voices of breastfeeding supporters such as yourself.

This thread asks about formula and I've just said that for me it make a huge positive difference switching to formula feeding. I am entitled to share that view just as much as you are yours.

I'm not saying the op should switch to formula at all, unlike you trying to persuade her to keep breastfeeding.

dannydyerismydad gave wonderful advice, just to add.

My baby fed all day all night I felt like trapped and could even go to the post office without him screaming, not crying. Screaming.

I adapted myself around him, co-slept,put him in a sling. At 10 months he sleeps if i put him down awake no bed time ritual, sleeps through the night in his own crib.

I've just had another read of your post strokeoftwelve
I didn't fall at the first hurdle.

The first hurdle was when I first bf my dd after birth and she stopped breathing on the breast and then had to spend her first 12 hours on a drip.

I think its fair to say that could have had a major impact on my supply and the way I felt about breastfeeding. However I still attempted to bf her when she was out of the incubator and drip, and she very quickly and drastically lost lots of weight (within 2 days) so by the 5th day of sleepless nights and dd looking smaller and smaller by the day, I caved and switched to formula.

I don't really know why I am justifying myself to you actually but it makes me feel better about my choice.

My sister successfully bf after giving a dummy.
Her baby was more contented then mine when I wanted to give one later she wouldn't take it.
I would imagine as long as you wake baby up and ensure feeds say at least every 3 hours your supply would be fine
(Though now no need to take away dummy)
I had to put her down in middle of bed with my arm round her and try to slip it away later (superking bed)

You are right- you don't have to justify yourself and I am not sure why you are doing so.

Because you clearly have a big problem with ff mothers. I was just explaining why you first post to me was such a massive jump to conclusion on your part.

You are jumping to conclusions if you think I have a problem with ffing mothers.

Pot Kettle.

Ok fair enough, I apologise for that comment.

Ok Lj8893.

Take all the advice about BF but iF you feel that FF is the way forward then there's nothing wrong with it. I have 2 very bright healthy children who never had any boob. Persevere with your BF but be kind to yourself too and so what is ultimately best for you all as a family.

Can I ask strokeoftwelve what you suggest I should have done in my situation?

Not a sarcastic question, I'm just genuinely interested. Like I say I hope to bf when I have another dc and don't want the same thing to happen again!!

Firstly getting good support is essential- not always found within the NHS.

You had a traumatic experenc- for which I am genuinely sorry btw.

Formula is sometimes necessary and it does sound as if some good judgements were made at that time.
Once the situation was stabilised and baby back home then if you had wanted to ebf again then focus on increasing your supply ( while supplementing with formula as necessary)
At only a few weeks post partum your prolactin levels are still very high so ramping up to full production again should be relatively easy. ( remember even women who adopt babies and who have never given birth can still breastfeed)

This could be achieved by a number of measures, having a 2 day "babymoon", super switch nursing, the use of a supplementary nursing system ( SNS), perhaps domperidone treatment.
The exact management of the situation would depend on your circumstances, but in all cases you would need knowledgeable help.

Having said that the chances of success would be high and formula could be dropped in a relatively short time.

Getting expert help is the key though.

I think ff could make a difference but, if 90% of bf babies say experience this then this is how it is "meant to be"
It is the long sleeping of the ff babies if it exists that is unusual.
I think more could be done to prepare people for the reality.
Ff can cause it's own problems like more spit up, constipation and wind, and babies can be allergic to the milk.

Lots of people I know bf and used dummies

Thank you. Fingers crossed my next experience will be completely different but that's some good advice.

You have my best wishes Lj8893 X

I breastfed dd and ds1 to a year and ds2 to 2 and a bit.

They all had dummies from about 2/3 weeks old. I would have gone crazy if not. Dd in particular (first baby) had rotten colic. The colic made her stomach hurt. She fed for comfort. Got worse stomach ache. Vicious circle. The dummy helped her out and we didn't look back.