Tiktok can you help me please?

[QuietNinjaTardis]

Hi I just wanted to ask some questions and you seem very knowledgable so wanted to pick your brain.
When dd was weighed at 5 weeks old they queried how she was as she'd only put on 13lb since she was born. She always had plenty of wet nappies, very content, either came off herself after a feed or de latched asleep. Very content etc etc. they hv suggested that I wake her up a bit after she had finished and instead of offering second boob (as I thought you were supposed too) to offer the same boob again so she got more of the fatty milk. Sometimes this worked sometimes this didn't. Anyway she was weighed two weeks later and had out on 8 ounces and they said they were happy. Is the advice they gave right? I don't know whether to keep her on the same boob as long as poss or to offer the second?
Also of she does feed from both (or both more than once) which boob do I offer at the next feed? Sometimes she snacks from second boob so I offer that one a the next feed but what if she drains both? How do I know which to offer first?

Also she seems like she's teething, drooling and sucking really hard on hands and last night and today she's only snacked on boobs with lots of pulling off and latching on and not eating properly. What shall I do about this?
I'm sorry for lots of questions but want to get it right. If anyone else can help too then it would be much appreciated.

Your baby sounds like she is doing fine, now :)

The HV's advice to only feed on one side was incorrect - it sounds like she does not understand the best way to go about increasing a baby's weight. Offering the second (or third...or fourth or more....as in 'switch nursing' ) increases the volume of milk made, and the volume of milk going into the baby, and you would only normally deliberately restrict a baby to one side only if you had too much milk. The idea that baby's should only have one side 'to get the hindmilk' is seriously outdated. She needs some retraining :)

There's a good explanation of this here: www.nancymohrbacher.com/blog/2010/6/27/worries-about-foremilk-and-hindmilk.html Maybe share with your HV (without saying she needs retraining, though, natch!)

As you found, your baby sometimes showed she needed both sides, anyway.

It's true your baby is a little slower than usual to gain weight - you don't say what her progress on the chart is, and it would be helpful to know. She's still gaining slowly, and it would make sense to make sure she is feeding at every opportunity, using both breasts at least each time.

The behaviour you describe is something babies do occasionally, and it would only be a concern if it lasted more than a day or so.

Maybe speak to a breastfeeding counsellor or go to a bf support group for more help with this?

Hope things go well.

Thank you so much tiktok. So when she comes off one side do I offer the other? She's always been quite efficient and feeds quickly average ten min but Hv said to try an get her to feed for twenty min. If she comes off after ten do I offer other side then?
She is going up the chart and I'm going to get her weighed next week to check but she feels heavier and is content and lots of wet/dirty nappies.
Hopefully all the fussing is jut a blip then.

Ok and which side do I offer for next feed? Say she's fed on both boobs?

I just offer the boob which wasn't used last if that makes sense! The exception being if there's been a bit of a gap and if a boob feels very full then will offer that one first. Often my dd has a preferred side at different times of the day, so will just give the favorite side first and switch to the other side once she's a bit sleepy.
I'm not a professional just thought it might be helpful to hear how someone else does it! Hope things improve for you but sounds like you are doing great anyway,

QuietNinja, yes, your HV really has misunderstood how the whole thing works. If there is a concern about a baby's intake, 'making' her stay on one side longer than she indicates she wants to is the wrong move :(

When you dd comes off the first side (unless it's part of initial fussing and messing about, in which case you'd put her back on the same side) let her have a little break for a burp/cuddle, and then offer the second side.

Next time, you'd normally offer that second side first, but this is not really crucial every time (as Cake says), and you can just do what feels right at the time :)

Time is no indication either. Dd3 fed for a long time but ds only fed for 10 mins and both put on weight similarly.
Drove me mad when in hospital as they kept asking for times.

You guys are fab thank you. Really appreciate all the replies and help.

Thanks for the link tiktok. Bloody Hv! Will just feed dd as and when she wants, for as long as she wants, on the sides she wants. So long as she stays happy then ill assume I'm doing it right.