Crisis of confidence EBF at 6 weeks

[Imnotbeverley]

Background is that my DS had complete tongue tie, snipped at 5 days old. Had formula top ups for the first week or so and I breastfed with nipple shields. Now fully breastfed, with nipple shields.

Various midwives etcetera have been able to latch him on without the shields after ages tries but I find it very tricky. I decided not to push it and focused on getting a good supply of milk established ie didn't even try without the shields for a couple of weeks.

Last week I decided to give it a go again and succeeded a couple of times whilst by myself at home with lots of cushions etc to get in a good position. I then had a terrible few days when a car narrowly missed my son in his pram (literally by centimetres) and crashed into the side of my car. I realise that it off topic but it really badly shook me up and I felt very anxious and on the verge of a panic attack for a few days. Feeling much better now but I would really prefer to be not using the shields any more. I feel rather like I'm cheating, and also feel worried when we go out (what if I've forgotten them and can't feed him etc).

I suppose I'm wondering if anyone had had a similar experience and been able to phase nipple shields out? If I'm not able to stop using them then is there a point when my baby will outgrow them and I won't be able to breastfeed anymore? Do babies find it harder or easier to feed with them? Our feeds often still take a while eg 45 mins)?

I should add that I have quite flat nipples, so it's not that easy to latch him on.

Sorry for rambling, any advice appreciated x

Bump.

If anyone can bear to read through all of that!

No experience of nipple shields but wanted to bump for you and to ask if you have tried laid-back breastfeeding/ biological nurturing? It sounds like you are struggling with positions a bit and I found this the best way to get a good latch.
Sorry to hear about the car - that's sounds terrifying. Well done for getting this far; breastfeeding really isn't easy

In a very similar position to you, my ds is 5 weeks and had a 75% tongue tie snipped at 8 days. He couldn't Breastfeed to start with so was on formula the lovely lady at the breast feeding clinic introduced me to nipple shields before he had his tongue done. We are still using them as he really struggles without and it I just want him feeding. He's done it a couple of times without once when it fell off and he didn't notice before latching back on and once when I whipped it off halfway through! It is a fiddle when were out and putting it on under a feeding scarf but think we will be using them for a while!
Sorry not much help really!

Six weeks old is typical for near-constant feeds, usually in the late afternoon and evening. This is because the baby is having a growth support and needs to up your supply. Www.Kellymom.com is an excellent resource that will have information on cluster feeding and other interesting stuff.

If your baby doesn't have great technique yet (and this can happen without tongue tie having been present) then other ways of latching on e.g. the nipple flick (search here or online) can help a lot.

Are you looking after yourself, getting frequent rest etc? Keep up the skin to skin too, and recognise what you've achieved.

Thanks, I'll have a look at some different positions to help latching him on.

It's hard (of course) to find time to rest- I find it hard to get him off to sleep at home in the day time so we are normally out in the pram or car when he sleeps. DP is very supportive and does what he can- naturally that's pretty limited with me breastfeeding.

Oh bless you, breastfeeding is so tough in the first few weeks isn't it?!

I have no experience with nipple shields but my son had a tight posterior tongue tie that despite me mentioning numerous times went unnoticed until we finally got it snipped at 16 weeks old. Those 16 weeks were honestly awful with the latching issues we had, the only technique that worked for us was 'the flipple' also known as an exaggerated /extended latch I think. YouTube has some tutorials but it really did make latching a lot easier for us and he soon learnt how to feed effectively.

My sister did use nipple shields and by 12 weeks she had managed to stop using them, I think she just kept trying to latch without them until they both got the hang of it.

Well done for making it to 6 weeks!
I wish you all the best

I had the same with dc1 - TT (snipped at 4 weeks) and flat/inverted nipples. I used nipple shields throughout. I never meant to, but I just couldn't manage it without them. I kept a supply of nipple shields with me -eg one always in my change bag. I think I got caught short once or twice, and did actually manage to feed without.

It's not cheating- if it's keeping you EBF, then keep it up.

[disclaimer: I am 10 days in to dc2 and EBF with nipple shields again, even though I swore I'd manage without this time. I too feel like I'm cheating and am a failure ]

whatwillsantabring thankyou for posting, I really feel relieved knowing that it is possible to EBF using nipple shields long term. I was worried he would get too big soon and they wouldn't work. Did you find that feeds became shorter with them? I believe that feeds do become much quicker in general and got myself all worried that the shields might prevent that from happening? Strange how I can read you say that you feel as if you are cheating and think "she shouldn't, she's doing so well!" But when it's me I don't! I do hope that you can feel happy to be getting breast milk into your baby, and congratulations x

RoseHoney thankyou for the sympathy and encouragement. DS has just woken up after managing just under 6 hours, amazing what a difference a bit of sleep makes to one's outlook! I'm going to keep trying to latch him on during the day, and use the shields at night- for now!

For flat nipples, wearing breast shells really helped me. Put them in your bra and the pressure seems to help them pop out more. Or using a good breast pump sucks them our more too. I don't have that problem any more at 13 weeks and haven't for some time.

Yes, the feeds got shorter and easier- as far as I know, it was the same as if I hadn't used shields. There does seem to be a big difference in shields- I found the boots own brand to be the thinnest and softest- others ( includinding medela) seem really stiff in comparison. The boots ones are so flexible, I just can't see how they can affect supply or latch at all - DC got his mouth right onto the areole just like you see in the guides!