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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

HELP. Very worried baby on hunger strike at nursery

27 replies

JennT · 20/07/2006 22:16

DD has just started nursery. She is just 6 months old. I start work a week on Wednesday, she has been to nursery short stops, but from yesterday has done 10.00-15.30. She (up until now) has been completely breastfed.

Up until we went on holiday 2 weeks ago, she reluctantly took ebm from a bottle every night. We went on holiday and I got meningitis. I was in hospital for 6 days and at first she was ok with the bottle and then went on hungerstrike. Quite frankly dh was overwhelmed with visiting me, looking after a baby who wouldn't drink or feed, and as soon as I was allowed to feed her myself gave up giving the bottle. She had dry nappies for 3 days until I was allowed to feed her myself. In the mean time my milk supply went right down as I couldn't sit up and didn't have the energy to express.

My milk supply is still no where near what it was and I am still recovering and trying to recouperate. DD will be at nursery 3 days and I will be expressing while at work. Have been expressing these last 2 days but getting hardly any milk.

DD has had 2 oz of milk ONLY both days at the nursery. I tried to give her ebm from a cup with very limited sucess, but not enough to give her any volume.

Sorry this is so long, and quite frankly I am going to have to go to bed in a minute as am knackered and at the end of my tether. When I am back at work full time I will be away from her for nearly 12 hours. HELP

OP posts:
soapbox · 20/07/2006 22:21

My DD would never drink from a bottle at all. When I went back to work at 8months though, she would drink from one of the avent soft spout bottles. Might it be worth trying that?

There are people on here who are better placed to advise on augmenting your milk supply than me - and I am sure they will be along shortly

tamum · 20/07/2006 22:25

I had exactly the same experience as soapbox with both mine, and also used the soft spouts. They also had solid food, as sloppy as possible to keep their fluid intake up. It's such a worry, but they do survive. Awful for you having to deal with being ill too, though. I do sympathise.

Original poster
JennT · 20/07/2006 22:28

Have tried a very soft spout and the avent non drip cup without the valve. Also tried every teet and bottle under the sun.

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Original poster
JennT · 20/07/2006 22:33

Do I restart the bottle (which took 18 hours last time) or increase milk supply and then do it. My nipples are now sore from trying to express to no avail.

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LeahE · 20/07/2006 22:35

DS wouldn't drink from a bottle, cup, anything the first three weeks or so he was at nursery (he was about 8 months though). I'd not been able to get him to take more than 2 oz absolute tops out of a bottle or sippy cup (and normally only 1 oz or less) and was worried when he started, but they said they were used to it and that things generally setted down. For those few weeks he started reverse-cycling so fed a LOT at night to compensate for not drinking much during the day. Then he gradually started to drink at nursery, then to drink more, and the night feedings cut down again.

My guess would be that the same thing will happen with your DD and that given time and the attention of experienced professionals who have dealt with this sort of thing before she will start to drink at nursery. But you may get the night feeding thing as well, which I know isn't what you need on top of recovering from meningitis and going back to work, but will (if it happens) help to build up your supply again. When DS went through this stage we were still cosleeping, which made it a bit easier.

soapbox · 20/07/2006 22:36

Do you have a picture of your dd to look at while you try and express- the let down is definitely more effective then.

Will she at least take other fluids from a cup - water, herbal tea??? That way at least she won't dehydrate.

MrsJohnCusack · 20/07/2006 22:43

Jenn - slightly OT here - but are you really well enough to go back to work that soon if you're recovering from meningitis? That and the stress of all this - you poor thing! not very helpful I know but I really think that you shouldn't be going back so soon after your illness.

DD would never drink from a bottle (she breastfed until 10 months and then totally refused that too - very determined child) and so went straight onto the soft spouts and then those Tommy Tippee hard spout ones.

Keep this bumped and someone who can help you on increasing your supply should be along soon

singersgirl · 20/07/2006 22:45

DS2 was like this (though we didn't have the traumatic experience of illness - sorry to hear about your meningitis).

I went back to work when he was 7 months old 3 days a week, and he wouldn't even take EBM. He had about 2oz a day from the nanny, with a morning and night breastfeed from me.

On the days I wasn't working I just fed him more often, and I expressed once a day in the office. I could only express by not thinking about it. I massaged the breast first to warm it up and then I used to read something really boring. Let down happened automatically after a while. If I tried thinking about him, I just panicked and I didn't get let down.

We also gave him solid food and mixed EBM into that - stuff like carrot puree or baby rice.

In the end I carried on breastfeeding him until 26 months, so my milk supply survived it all.

Good luck!

Original poster
JennT · 20/07/2006 22:48

Thanks. Am now crying. Not sure being upset and having a dd who won't feed is sufficient for a sick note though. She has had some water from a cup but not much. Her last nappy was very concentrated yellow.

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singersgirl · 20/07/2006 22:52

Is there any way you can postpone your return to work? My employers were very understanding when I asked to delay for two weeks for personal reasons (we had to make a trip abroad because DH was being relocated).

It would give you more time to recover and hopefully for you to get a feeding pattern sorted.

Sorry if you have tried this and it is no use.

MrsJohnCusack · 20/07/2006 22:53

oh I didn't mean to make you cry

but 6 days in hospital 2 weeks ago is probably enough for a sick note I reckon. sounds like you have far too much on your plate and that isn't going to help your milk supply!

Is there a difference when you give the EBM and when someone else does it? Some babies will not take a cup/bottle from their mother as they know perfectly well that they could cut out the middle man.

Original poster
JennT · 20/07/2006 22:53

Have got to go to bed now. Will bump in morning.

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Original poster
JennT · 20/07/2006 22:54

The biggest struggle was to get someone OTHER than me to give her the bottle.

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Original poster
JennT · 20/07/2006 22:55

Oh and did I say it was in France? The food was filth! Must go to bed night night.

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MrsJohnCusack · 20/07/2006 22:56

oh interesting. that was actually the same for me. I did finally get her to take a cup, it took great determination from me and lots of tears, but she did get used to it

listen, the search all messages feature doesn't seem to be working at the moment so can't link to anything useful there on increasing supply but maybe it will be on again tomorrow, will have a look then

have a good night's sleep

tiktok · 21/07/2006 00:17

Jenn- I am so sorry to read your story. can I just say what I thought when reading it - your little girl is showing in the only way she can (I think) that she is confused and angry and upset. You were 'out of it' at a time when she was not in her own familiar surroundings and she is certainly old enough to know what life is like and what keeps her feeling good....and there was this massive change in her life. She expressed her feelings by refusing to feed - to the extent she was dehydrating. Now, she returns home and her life is turned upside down again, with people she doesn't know and who don't love her like you do looking after her.

It is so hot she really needs to feed, but you know from what happened on holiday that she will ignore this in her confusion.

I don't think it sounds as if you are well enough to go back to work in less than 2 weeks, but in any case for the moment, can she be at home with you, so you can recover your closeness and she can recover her security? Then is it possible to extend your time off until you are both ok enough to withstand the separation...maybe starting part time at first?

I hope none of this sounds over the top....but nursing strikes in my experience start for a reason, and babies have feelings.

Original poster
JennT · 21/07/2006 19:46

Thanks TikTok. She took 3oz today and then another 1oz later from a cup at nursery. Thing is she looks like she really enjoys it! Big grins when she gets there and (they tell me) very happy all day. She eats (plays) well and does take water. When I got her home today she took ebm from the bottle no problem! We thought hooray we've cracked it and then as we put her down was having none of it! She hasn't gone to bed hungry as she fed loads before her dinner which she didn't really do much with. Her nappies are wet again and has had a dirty one with food in it. All in all she is happy and alert.

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Jezee · 21/07/2006 20:46

JennT I am so sorry to hear about your difficulties, and I thought I was suffering when I had to breastfeed my ds2 when I had a recent tummy upset and felt so weak as I was unable to keep anything down. My ds2 is also exclusively breastfed (now 5.5 mths old) and reluctant to take milk from the bottle. I've tried different teats and found he liked the MAM ones so he will take ebm or water from bottle. Trouble is I can only express 1-2 oz's so not enough for a full feed, so i've been trying to get him to take formula. I too will be going back to work in a few weeks and am worried what will happen. I'm happy to breastfeed in morning and night but want him to take formula during the day. He just doesn't seem to like formula at all though and now he's weaning my milk supply is going down. Am going to buy Avent soft spout cup to try with formula milk... fingers crossed. I did hear that the herb FENUGREEK is good for increasing milk supply. Hope that helps. Good Luck

tiktok · 21/07/2006 21:40

Great, Jenn - the worries about her taking less fluid are not needed, then, that's good. Is she ging to the breast with no problems now?

Original poster
JennT · 21/07/2006 21:54

No problems going to the breast at all and never have been. Problem was I wasn't allowed to feed her and she wouldn't take any alternative. When I am away from her 12 hours a day (for 3 days when at work) I can't just pick her up early before she has missed her second feed like I am right now.

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Original poster
JennT · 21/07/2006 21:56

DD has no logic to what she will and won't take. Right now am using MAM teats with the Avent bottles I have loads of as less faff to wash. She WAS taking bottle for 3 months and then nothing.

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Original poster
JennT · 21/07/2006 21:58

JEZEE I was using a hand pump and bought an electrical double one. They say that they don't express more than you can by hand but it has helped a little.

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Original poster
JennT · 26/07/2006 16:51

I just wanted to update. DD has just been to nursery and polished off 10oz of ebm from bottles. She has eaten well and the staff were amazed at what a different child she was. Thanks to everybody who gave me sympathy. I am feeling much better about going back to work next week. I am also feeling much better and going for and Indian head massage tomorrow.

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singersgirl · 26/07/2006 17:03

I'm glad it's going well now, Jenn. Good luck back at work and keep on taking the massages!

Original poster
JennT · 26/07/2006 17:15

And my milk supply is back to what it was! Did a massive feedathon over weekend. DD has also slept through night twice on trot but not holding breathe about that yet.

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