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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

how long does it take for babies to 'forget' about bfing?

6 replies

flipflopson5thavenue · 10/12/2013 08:58

I'm currently weaning DS who is just over 16mo, planning to have finished bfing completely by 18mo. Over last fortnight or so I've dropped early morning feed, and he now has milk in a cup and is happy for me to go to him and prepare it and give it to him, and no longer launches himself sideways to get boob when I go and pick him up.

I'm going to drop bedtime feed from new year, and will do it in the same way as morning feed. Alternate me and boob with DP and cup at bedtime for a week, then maybe two nights with DP and one night with me, and then a week or so with DP before I start doing bedtime again with a cup.

Still some mornings once he's been up for a bit and we're having a cuddle he'll want to bfeed, and he hasn't had it in the mornings for a couple of weeks. Am wondering when he'll 'forget' that he used to get bf in the morning, and likewise, is a week of no bf at bedtime enough for him to 'forget' that's what he gets when I put him to bed?

I guess am just concerned about doing this as gently as possible, and I don't want to try to give him milk in a cup at bedtime when he'll still expect BM from me and it'll upset him.

can you tell I'm putting off dropping this last bedtime feed ;-))

OP posts:
leedy · 10/12/2013 11:01

Really not long at all in DS1's case, though he was 2.5 and had been down to just a bedtime feed for some time and more or less self-weaned (with a bit of a nudge from preggo me). I don't think he ever asked for it again after his last feed. He was already used to a fairly regular "daddy bedtime" at that stage, so no milk bedtimes were pretty familiar.

I didn't introduce milk in a cup instead, btw, just rejigged the bedtime routine so no beverages were involved whatsoever. :)

MommaLHK · 10/12/2013 11:57

I'm currently trying to wean my 23mth old DD. She has only been doing bedtime feeds for a long while now, so cutting out the bedtime feeds means going cold turkey. We tried a gradual approach, but my sense is that sooner or later you get to a point where there is no more boobie, and then you have to face the music (i.e. the "music" of cries and screams). We're 2.5 weeks in and she still asks for it and has tantrums at bedtime. We have tried to replace the BF comfort with lots of cuddles and assurance, but it's proving to be quite a process. My guess is that as long as you're still doing the night time feed, he'll connect the boobs with the feeds, and remember those morning feeds. Like you, I'm also wondering how long it will last before DD accepts that BF-ing is over. I suspect like most things, it varies widely by the individual child. We're about 2.5 weeks and counting... Good luck.

Thumbnutstwitchingonanopenfire · 10/12/2013 12:02

With Ds1, it took about a week. He was 23mo, we'd both reached a stage where it was last-thing-at-night feeds only and it was just starting to get slightly uncomfortable - so one night I just said No. He asked about 3 times, but then went to sleep. Next night, asked twice and went to sleep. 3rd night, asked once and went to sleep. That was it. A few days later, my boobs were ready to burst and I thought "I know it's a bad idea but the relief would be nice" so offered him a boob and he just looked at me as if to say "what in HELL are you doing, mummy??"

But a friend of mine weaned her DS after he was 2, he wasn't ready to stop at all but she so was, and she had to tell him her boobs were "broken". Months later he was still asking if they were "still broken?" and when I had DS2, he remembered that he used to do that with Mummy - and looked at her hopefully! (He was 3 and a bit when my DS2 was born!)

OnTheRunAndUpTheDuff · 10/12/2013 12:04

Really not long for us. We weaned at 19 months - although due to pregnancy my milk had been gone for at least a month so I'm not sure if that made a difference. He asked two mornings in a row, wasn't bothered when I said no (distracted him with postman pat) and then never asked again :(

We had also cut down gradually, from feeding all night and multiple times during the day at 16 months (when we night weaned), to just once or twice a day by the time he stopped.

BaronessBomburst · 10/12/2013 12:08

Just bear in mind that although your DCs may have stopped asking for milk, they also may not have forgotten it! My cousin's DD had been weaned at 13 months or so but it didn't stop her from flying across the room shouting "booby" and trying to latch onto me when I sat down to feed my DS. She'd already been weaned a year. :)

gaggiagirl · 10/12/2013 12:14

My DD hasn't breastfed for just over 2 years and she still tries to get some!
In fact I caught her asking my aunty for a feed once her baby was finished his feed!
Im dreading my dsis new arrival next year. Only because DD will be asking someone else for boob [shame]

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