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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

guilt over stopping bf?

14 replies

nattylou · 12/07/2006 17:38

DS is 19 weeks tomorrow and has been 99% exclusively bf. Over the last 2 weeks or so, he has been slowly reducing the amount of time he feeds, from 20 mins per side to 10 minutes. He then just seems to play with my boobs and smile at me (typical man!) However, his weight gain has gone down to 3 ounces a fortnight and he has dropped from 75th centile down to 50th. He is alsoe waking 3 times a night now, from going more or less right through. I feel like my supply has totally diminished, and he is not getting enough milk to feel full. I don't want to stop bf, as dd was failure to thrive and he has taken to it like a duck to water, but if he is not getting enough, maybe formula is the best thing for him.

I have just read another thread which mentioned putting him to the breast for 15 mins before each bottle feed so that I can try and increase my let down and my supply, but in the mean time, i feel like my son is starving.

If i do stop feeding him, I feel so guilty as I know it is the best thing for him, and I love doing it but i really don't know what to do for the best.

Please help x

OP posts:

mears · 12/07/2006 17:47

nattylou - he is already increasing you milk supply by waking more frequently at night. Once the milk supply is boosted again he wqill settle. Why is he being weighed fortnightly? It is usual for a baby's weightgain to fluctaute as they become more active. There is nothing here that tells me he needs formula. What is the 1% that is not breastmilk if you don't mind me aksing?

Original poster

nattylou · 12/07/2006 18:20

a mixture of formula and expressed breast milk as I go to college one night a week.

OP posts:

SenoraPostrophe · 12/07/2006 18:26

don't stop yet!

ds went through a phase of messing about like this at about this age (or maybe a bit younger - memory hazy). i think it was just that he was more curious by then, and also more impatient. I got over it by feeding him in a quiet room and/or feeding him lying down.

it's quite normal for them to start waking again at this age too. ds didn't do that, but only because he never slept right through.

purplemonkeydishwasher · 12/07/2006 18:27

as baby's get older they get better at nursing so he may be on the boob for less time but as he's more efficient he may be getting the milk he needs.
and as mears said if he's feeding a lot at night it'll be helping your supply.

purplemonkeydishwasher · 12/07/2006 18:28

actually now that you mention it my DS did get really nosy and impossible to feed if there were any distractions. but at night...who needs sleep right?

Jasnem · 12/07/2006 18:31

nattylou - my ds is almost 20 weeks, and does much the same. He has also dropped from 75th to 50th ver past 6 weeks. I put shorter feeds down to him being more efficient at taking the milk.Their growth does fluctuate.

Don't give up now, it's such a wonderful thing to do, andif you both enjoy it there really is no reason to stop.

Original poster

nattylou · 12/07/2006 18:40

have just spoken to a NCT bf counsellor and she really helped. She said to keep going and offer him the breats whenever he seems to want it, both sides, and then top him up with formula if necessary. I will see how it goes tonight. I am not giving up, I've decided!

OP posts:

tiktok · 12/07/2006 19:09

natty, glad you sound better. Did the NCT counsellor really, really say that? I am astonished - why on earth she suggested formula I really don't know. If you want to give formula, then of course you can, but there's zero in your post that makes me think your baby needs it.

If he is already having quite a lot of formula it would be a different matter, though.

ruthydd · 13/07/2006 08:27

...and please don't worry about the fall from 75% to 50% - thats normal for breastfed babies. Both mine fell from 50% to 9% at about this age. Those silly graphs in the red book are based on bottle-fed babies and can be very misleading.

tiktok · 13/07/2006 10:06

ruthy, what you say is true about bf babies - there is a natural falling off as they get older. However, the charts used here are not based on bottle fed babies. They are based on thousands of babies, whose feeding is not differentiated. However, it's safe to say not many of them will have been exclusively breastfed at 19 weeks.

Bibliophile · 13/07/2006 10:09

all four month olds IME get more unsettled. Think it is developmental stage personally, not really food related. They settle down again if you don't panic.

Bibliophile · 13/07/2006 10:09

all four month olds IME get more unsettled. Think it is developmental stage personally, not really food related. They settle down again if you don't panic.

munz · 13/07/2006 10:16

natty - Joeys' the same as your DS, and I feel exactly the same as you re the feeding. firstly and most importantly what ever you decided your done brilliantly feeding for the past 19 weeks and have given your DS a very good start.

Joey's times also gone down as has is weight (we're talking from putting on 10oz p/w to 3/4 oz at best). the way I figure it is if he wasn't satisfied then he'd be screaming blue murder to get on my boob and constantly stay there! lol.

I believe it's around 4 months they do the whole distracted baby thing (althou tictok can prob give better advice on that), what I normally do when Joey's i that mood is feed him and when he keeps coming off just for a smile I don't talk to him and he'll suckle nicely again, but if he keeps coming on/off (I'm sure it's jsut to say come on mum watch me i'm being a good boy! lol) then I take him off and offer him the boob sooner than I would have done if it was a good feed iycwim.

the centile thingy - I alsways thoughtt ehy were based on bottle fed babies not BF so to keep your DS on the 75th centile is v good going.

princessmel · 13/07/2006 10:22

Hi Nattylou, My dd is 11 months and I'm still bf her. Only morn, mid afternoon ,bedtime and once in night ( I know she shouldn't be waking for it but she does) and at that age she was really restless on the breast. Her weight gain slowed too and the HV had me going in for extra weighs to keep a check even though she was fine. I think it was because she had got really quick at feeding, her feeds from really early on were only 3 mins 3 hourly and because she was so interested in what her bro was doing. She would cry if I tried to put her back on so I know she'd had as much as she wanted. I just fed her on her own and still do, (unless we're out etc). Don't stop now!!

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