Desperate for a solution

[Flyer747]

My dd is 5 weeks old, she was delivered via c section at 40+2 and weighed a healthy 9lb 10.5oz, in recovery I tried to breast feed, she kind of latches on. However she was taken away from me and transferred to scbu as a precaution because she has stork marks on her eyes and someone (medical staff) was worried she may have an infection as I carry group b strep.

I was reunited with her at 6pm that same evening some 7 hrs after she was born when I was allowed to be wheeled around to scbu we attempted to breast feed but I was in agony from my c section trying positions in a wheel chair it was awkward and uncomfortable so we gave up. That night she stayed in scbu and I was on a high dependancy ward as I lost quite a lot of blood. All fine though other than that.

The following day I went to see her, again tried bf and had no joy. The scbu had been cup feeding her aptimal and commented she was 'a hungry baby' she eventually came out of scbu at 5pm that evening and joined my on the ward. We spent the next 4 days trying to establish bf, it was excruciating and the latch was wrong, no one helped me as the hospital is so under staffed. One day finally a lovely mw helped me with the latch, but she just shoved her on and didn't explain how to do it.

My milk came in on day 5 by this point she was still on ff and I was expressing and giving her ebm also.

I attempted daily to get her to latch eventually we sort of got it, although it was not right but we muddled on through.

Fast forward through the weeks and my dd now refuses to take a bottle. We've been referred to alder hey as she was tongue tied, that's been snipped but she still isn't gaining weight property. 5 weeks on she weighs 10lb 2.5oz so since birth only a 6oz total gain.

She was on the 91st centile when born she's now dropped to the 50th centile.

She only feeds for about 10 mins per feed and only ever takes one boob. In the early days she just fell asleep on the boob, or just wasn't bothered about waking for food. I was going out of my mind.

She often fusses on the breast in the evening, cries pulls off it wants to go back on and repeats the above cycle.

I'm so so worried she is going to carry on not gaining adequate weight and start to become really underweight and failing to thrive.

I'm going to the doctors today as I can't deal with the stress anymore it's made me start with PND and I need help asap.

I wish I would have just kept her on formula as she was guzzling down loads whilst in hospital and even the staff commented how much she enjoyed her milk. It seems the problems started when I tried to bf. However now she refuses point blank a bottle.

Any advice would be grateful.

No advice just hugs. I'm combo feeding my 13 week old (long story) but have found tiktok's (on mn) advice very useful.

Also, kellymom website is amazing

Good luck xxxx

Hi op.
Sorry to hear you're struggling :(
Hopefully (tictok) some good advice will come soon.
Have you called any of the support lines? (Sorry can't link on phone) but breastfeeding network and le latch league are great. Also is there a bf group near you?

Flyer :( :( What a difficult start :( :(

Yes, call any of the helplines.

Seems to me you need real life help, too, from someone who knows what they are talking about and who you trust.

Your early help sounds poor - I won't list all the things that should have happened/shouldn't have happened unless you ask me :) but you were badly treated, for sure.

Now, though, is where we are. Babies born on the high centiles often spend the first six weeks or more 'catching down' - this is well known, and any HCP you are in touch with could be asked about this. It may be this is what is happening to your baby and if you can get this confirmed, it will save a lot of worry.

If your baby is not just catching down, and actually needs more calories, then there are ways to achieve this - you probably know all of them, and you can talk them through on a helpline and work out when/if you can do them.

Your baby could feed more often - offer more feeds without pressing her if she declines. Use breast compression. Use switch nursing.

If your baby is ok, and feeding well and thriving (and she may well be - see above) then accepting she knows what she needs and will take it, will help with your stress. The fact she refuses a bottle is a big hint she does not need one :)

Often, mothers who have had a hard time and whose babies have been cared for in scbu take ages and ages to get rid of the horrible feelings and the worry there is something wrong with their baby. A caring HCP will help you with this....I really hope you get good help.

Thanks I will try those support lines. I just tried to give her a bottle and it's as if I'm trying to kill her the cries are unreal!

She's now happily sticking away on the breast.

Thanks Tik tok I have been under the care of the infant feeding team at Liverpool women's hospital and am going back tomorrow they are devising me a plan of care.

How would I find out if she is catching down? I'm only a petite size 8 however my partner is quite stocky so not really sure. My mum did say that both my sister and I were always on the thin side and we were very fussy eaters as babies, my sister was similar to my dd according to my mum.

I offer her the other breast but she's never interested. I also switch mid feed again it doesn't lengthen the feeds. And I do the breast compressions. I feed her every 3 hours but the truth be told she is really more happy being fed every 4 hours, I do get 8-10 feeds in her a day as well. She often likes to use my breast as a pacifier I think like nibbles it.

The hv wants me to buy a medela supplemental nursing system. I'm a bit dubious though as it means I'm literally a prisoner in my own home unable to leave for having to use this contraption which looks like a faff.

You'd have to ask the infant feeding specialist what they thought of catching down. Generally, it's applied to babies who are born at the top end of the charts, who gain slowly and who appear healthy and who are developing just fine.

The hassle of a nursing supplementer is worth it for a baby who needs it - but it's a proper nuisance for the babies who don't need it!

It sounds like you're feeding your baby according to her needs - hope the consultation tomorrow is a reassurance for you.

Mixed feeding my ds. Just this week I started using the nursing supplementer out and about (I have a homemade one I found how to make online that I tie around my neck). With practise I've found it no more faff than bottles.

Sunflower, that's great.... I have met women who have used it long-term, and yes, it's true that practice makes perfect! At first though, it can be really fiddly. Worth persevering if it's something a mother wants to do, though :)