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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

9 week old baby won't breastfeed at bedtime

11 replies

2crooners · 07/07/2006 15:10

Hello, I'm new but I've been reading the boards and there seems to be lots of helpful people out there. I'd be really grateful for any suggestions about why this is happening and what I can do about it...
My baby is completely refusing to breastfeed at bedtime, she just screams at me, mouths the breast, kicks and struggles. She usually feeds ok, but not brilliantly during the day and quite well at the nightfeed. She won't take a bottle of ebm at all (but that's a whole different problem), so I can't even substitute that, I just have to put her to bed hungry and crying, although she generally falls asleep quite quickly.
I think that I might have a supply problem at this time of day because I can't get much when I express but how can she know this when she won't even latch on sometimes? I'm finding it really upsetting.
She usually sleeps really well without a feed, usually until 4am but I hate putting her down crying and her weight gain is really slow (about 3oz per week) and falling off the centiles, so I don't think she can really afford not to feed.
All a bit of a mess to be honest, not really enjoying bfing at the moment as it is such a struggle and to make matters worse big sister (almost 3) keeps bashing baby on head during day feeds.

OP posts:
suzywong · 07/07/2006 15:31

why not try having a bath with her and seeing if she will latch on in the bath? The warmth and the skin to skin contact can act as appetite and latching stimulants.

If you keep this thread bumped tik tok or one of the BF experts will see it soon.

TBH her weight gain does not sound ideal so you really need to find a solution in the next few days

Good luck and keep bumping

2crooners · 07/07/2006 15:35

Thanks Suzy,
I'll try that tonight once I've got her big sister safely into bed!

OP posts:
suzywong · 07/07/2006 15:37

yes, just have a splash in the bath her and lay her on your chest and see what happens, she may just need more cues than other babies.

What's the 4am feed like?

louismummy · 07/07/2006 15:41

do you think that she might associate being 'bashed' on the head with feeding? is there anyway to disract dd1 whilst feeding or just strap her in a high chair or buggy???

2crooners · 07/07/2006 15:52

To be honest I could gladly lock dd1 in a box whilst feeding dd2 at the moment but I don't think I can really strap her in anywhere as I am trying to feed on demand and that can be a lot and as she is already a bit put out about the arrival of dd2, I don't think she would approve, I might try sticker book based bribery/distraction though...

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2crooners · 07/07/2006 16:42

Its getting worse, she has just slept for two hours after a not particularly brilliant feed and now she still doesn't seem interested (it around 4pm) she latched on ok but came off yelling after only a couple of minutes. she can't be getting enough.... no distractions at the moment either as dd1 is at nursery today. she is quite burpy and sicky. dd1 had reflux, but this doesn't seem like reflux. no white patches in her mouth, so probably not thrush, too little for teeth, so why is she so unhappy at feeds? I really need to get to the bottom of this...
sorry to moan on....

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peppamum · 07/07/2006 20:42

Hello, I posted a message about recently about my baby getting very upset and refusing to breastfeed, and I find that the bedtime feed is the worst. With a lot of patience, my baby is getting slightly better at feeding generally, but still I often end up giving a bottle at this feed (which I know is no help to you). I think it's a combination of the baby being tired, he definitely find it harder to feed if he's tired, and having a lesser supply. I've recently tried gaviscon, which is some help overall, but not when he's getting completely hysterical.

I don't know if you use a dummy, but sometimes if he gets very upset, I can calm him down with a dummy, then I get him into position, whip out the dummy, and put the breast in. Doesn't always work. Sorry, this is the only advice i can give, but you're not alone. I really wish I knew what the problem was too!

SoupDragon · 07/07/2006 20:44

I always do the bedtime feed lying down. Don't know if that would help.

2crooners · 08/07/2006 07:50

Thanks everyone,
Actually peppamum it does help to know that it's not just me......
Soupdragon, I tried to do the bedtime feed lying down a couple of days ago but unfortunately she still wasn't impressed...but thanks anyway
I did have some sucess with the bath last night (although it got a bit messy in the end and we were forced to get out) but I think the change in routine helped and she fed quite well without fussing for a few minutes. I'll keep trying anyway......

OP posts:
FloatingOnTheMed · 08/07/2006 08:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2crooners · 12/07/2006 20:19

Hello again,

Just a quick update, she's actually lost weight now so HV has given me a medela supplementary nursing system to try, basically a bottle on a string round your neck and two little tubes which you tape to your boobs. It is as much hassle as it sounds but it does actually seem to be working, so I can top her up with expressed milk wile she breastfeeds. As she gets rewarded with milk straight away she is willing to latch on and/or continue feeding even at bedtime, so this definately feels like a temporary solution at least..hopefully next week she will have gained some weight, if not I might have to resort to formula in the bottle....
Anyway I thought I'd add this in case anyone else is having similar problems. Thanks for all the suggestions as well.

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