4 months and having to stop breast feeding.... SAD....!

[charliebrown17]

Hi all.

I don't think there is anything more I can do but I wanted to share my story as I've just got off the phone to the health visitor and it would seem that I'm at the end of the breast feeding road. I'm so sad it's almost over as I wanted to feed for the long term. (Daughter is 4 months old)

Here is our story.

My beautiful girl was born 7.15lb and is an absolute poppet. She is a healthy little lady although was born with an eye condition which needs treatment under general when shes 6 months old.

She was soley breast fed for 3 months and has been combi fed for the last month. We took to it well, despite the initial pain!

When she was 6 weeks I developed mastitis, I was put on antibiotics but ploughed on feeding. The antibiotics worked whilst I was on them but as soon as I came off them the infection came back. It was very depressing at times! My daughter however seemed non the wiser and continued to grow at an impressive weight!

Things got so bad with my mastitis that I ended up in A&E twice and become a patient of the breast care unit. I narrowly missed having to have a chunk of my boob cut out and instead had my boob aspirated and drained twice a week for 3 weeks. Ouch!

All in all, I was on antibiotics for 8 weeks and had mastitis with two breast abscesses 5 times. I kept breast feeding throughout and until this day.

My desire to breast feed is fueled by a number of factors... 1. I enjoy it, I find it really bonding 2. It's easy in terms of being accessible/no need to steralise! 3. it's good for her, especially with her operation coming up, I want her to be in the best of health.

However, 4 weeks ago and with my mastitis back for a 5th time, the breast surgeon and my local doctor both said I must give up breast feeding. My own health was suffering and bad nipple thrush had set in. Also, I feel the the antibiotics can't have been good for my daughter although the doctors assured me only minimal amounts would have reached her.

I thought that rather than give up, I would introduce a formula bottle in the morning and another last thing at night. This tipped the balance and my daughter didn't mind in the slightest.

I have been mastitis free for almost 4 weeks and finally off antibiotics. Hoorah.

So why so sad I hear you say...

Well, my daughter has grown rather fond of the bottle, for two reasons I think. 1. It's much easier 2. My milk flow has reduced drastically and I can no longer satisfy her. (She drinks 7oz of formula in one sitting, my boob doesn't come close any more...once upon a time yes but now, no).

This last week has been a nightmare of her being incredibly frustrated and upset at my attempts to put her on my boob during the day. Today I ended up preparing a bottle, let her have it for a minute or two and then subtly remove it and exchanged for my breast. It worked for five minutes and then she realized and was only consoled by the bottle. It's been a similar story for most of the week - unless I feed her when she's not yet hungry and then she is a little happier to try the boob.

All this led me to ring the health visitor. She was very sympathetic and lovely but broke the news I didn't want to hear which was that I should probably listen to the signs which are that my daughter wants to move on and mum needs to get back to full health.

My instinct tells me that my girl is indeed ready to let go of mums boob and go it alone. Even though I don't want to admit that! How sad that makes me.

The only slight glimmer of hope is that I have always breast fed my little girl lying down at night and so far, her 1-2 night feeds have been smooth, she doesn't seem to fuss. Therefore, I will try to continue with breast feeding at night but I don't know how realistic that is. My milk will surely reduce so much soon that she too won't be satisfied at night either - my instinct can feel that too.

Expressing and bottle feeding that is obviously another option but the health visitor said it would be a lot of work and that instead I should accept the signs that she's ready. She also said that her 4 months of breast feeding will have prepared her immunity as far as is possible. Expressing could be risky for my mastitis also.

So, we're off to a new chapter now...

I think that's all. I'm just feeling glum and wanted to share my story...

Sob!

x

do you use a slow flow nipple and pace the bottle feedings? you need to make it so it's not as easy as breastfeeding.
the kellymom site has good info on that

Thanks all - again! Yes I use newborn 1 teats, I did go up to twos but quickly realised this may be causing problems so now we're back to ones! We only used 2's for a week....

My DD was mixed fed from a few days old. From 6-12 months we gradually phased out the formula (as she ate more solids). At 12 months, we started offering cow's milk and snacks in an attempt to day-wean her. She is now feeding morning, dinner time, through the night, and once or twice during the day if I'm there. But my supply has regulated so that if I'm not there, I'm perfectly comfortable going from 6am to 6pm without feeding her.

4 months is littler that 12 months (obviously!) but I'd suggest you give it a go.

Good god you've been through the mill and have persevered beyond the point most would've thrown in the towel. What a lucky girl she is to have a mum like you.

Op. I just wanted to post to let you know I think your amazing!

There is categorically no way I would have tried to bf after all you've been through. You are very determined & your little girl is lucky to have you.

First of all well done for making it to 4 months with all of those problems. No one would have blamed you for giving up a long time ago, i would have!

Your milk will not necessary dry up, i was feeding mine expressed breast milk for 6 weeks from birth and in the end only expressing morning and evening and it didn't seem to affect my supply. I just got more at once rather than smaller amounts throughout the day.

What i would say though, is that expressing and then bottle feeding it is such hard work. I had to give up because it consumed my entire day and i just couldn't keep it up. I wanted to bf but my baby wouldn't latch so this was my only option but in the end i decided that it was more important that i was more rested, had time to eat and able to actually leave the house.

4 months is a perfectly respectable length of time to bf for and you have done well by your baby. But the most important thing your baby needs is you to be well and rested so give yourself a break and give formula.

Charlie, has your baby been thoroughly checked for TT/LT? Recurrent mastitis may have a cause in tight frenulum attachments. I hope that you are feeling OK.

charlie how are you both getting on?

Hi Charlie. Hope you're doing ok. One other thing I should have mentioned is your nursing bra. Some mums find that a different bra can make a massive difference. One of the totally soft, stretchy ones is best that come in SML sizes rather than backs and cups. When breast feeding, your breasts can be different sizes over the day and a structured bra can be restrictive at times which can lead to problems.

So many things to try! Breast feeding is a wonderful thing when it goes well, but hitting on a fix when things get tricky is difficult.

Hi all!
We're doing good thanks - we're breast feeding all night plus the occasional tiny day feed, eg; when bottle not to hand or speed is required! It's been soooo much better and she's been much happier again. What's changed? Well, I'm convinced our trouble were because I increased the bottle teat size and bottle feeding because super easy. I've now put all newborn teats back in and she's not preferring bottle over boob or visa versa. I think this was the issue because once old teats were back in place she got very upset and bothered at the bottles but now she just knows that she has to work at getting her milk no matter where it comes from... I intend to breast feed evening, night and first am and the bottle through day for the foreseeable. Reduces my milk to keep mastitis at bay but means she's getting mums milk too.much happier this week....fingers crossed for no more fussy patches!

Don't feel guilty and don't beat yourself up. There is far, far, far more to being a good parent than breast feeding.

Wise words Caitalin x