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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

How to stop the bedtime breastfeed at 12 months?

15 replies

ClareTheBear · 23/06/2006 22:10

DS is 12 months and has a morning and bedtime bf, but I am going to stop breastfeeding and I'm not too sure how to approach cutting out the bedtime feed. Should I try and reduce the length of the feed gradually, as suggested on kellymom, or just stop it and read a book and have a cuddle instead? Or will there be too much crying for either of us to hear the story anyway?
Opinions and experiences much appreciated.

OP posts:
lahdeedah · 23/06/2006 22:17

I cut down gradually to one feed at bedtime, then just stopped one day and my DH gave a cup of milk instead. DD was a little bit upset, but not too bad. The only downside was that my breasts became really engorged and painful for a good 10 days afterwards! So probably next time I will cut down more gradually. This was at 9 months though, plus I have a big baby (99th centile!) - so maybe for you at 12 months it wouldn't be so bad as you're not producing so much milk? HTH

NotQuiteCockney · 23/06/2006 22:20

I would go from book, boob, bed, to boob, book, bed, iyswim. Change it so the book and the cuddle are what comes right before sleep. Then you can work on reducing the breastfeed, after you've made it optional, so to speak.

CarolinaMoose · 23/06/2006 22:23

we did it cold turkey. Dp put him to bed for a couple of nights and after that he'd pretty much forgotten about it. Not too much crying . He was 17mo at the time.

PeskyPixie · 23/06/2006 22:32

We did it cold turkey too, my daughter was 11 mths and we had a solid hour of her screaming and me going in, soothing her for a couple minutes, laying her down (she'd bounce straight back up again!) then me walking out and leaving her for a few minutes to cry before I went back in again. But at the end of all that fuss, she lay down and went to sleep on her own and after that was absolutely fine with just having warm formula from a beaker. Good luck with whatever way you choose!

hunkermunker · 23/06/2006 22:34

DS1 dropped the bedtime feed of his own accord at about 14mo. He stopped the morning feed at nearly 17mo. I was pg though, so think it had an effect.

Is there a reason you need to stop? Might it be easier to carry on till he drops them of his own accord if it's just morning and bedtime? You could always try offering him a cup of milk at bedtime some nights. Although saying that, DS1 rarely had milk at bedtime - he always wants water.

CarolinaMoose · 23/06/2006 22:37

I have a feeling that if I'd left ds to self-wean, I'd be going into school to bf him at breaktimes 10 years from now.

hunkermunker · 23/06/2006 22:38

I thought that too, CM, but DS1 lost interest quite quickly when he finally stopped.

Original poster
ClareTheBear · 23/06/2006 22:52

Oooh, conflicting opinions, still not sure what to do..
I want to stop as I'm hopefully going to be an egg donor and will need to take fertility drugs.

OP posts:
moondog · 23/06/2006 23:10

Clare,good for you,but i would put my own child's needs first.

Tommy · 23/06/2006 23:13

I stopped when we'd been out for the day and DS2 was asleep already when we got home. I just put him in bed and that was it! I let DH deal with him the first few times he woke in the night and putting him to bed for a few days but it was remarkably painless actually.

Original poster
ClareTheBear · 24/06/2006 12:53

moondog, yes, surely put ds needs first but he eats very well (as shown by the size of his ginormous belly!) and is healthy, so though I know there's some advantages to beastfeeding longer I don't think I'll be doing him any harm by stopping. Anyway, it feels like an OK time to stop to me, and I'm pretty pleased we made it this far.

OP posts:
alex8 · 24/06/2006 13:45

I cut out the am feed first then a week later the night feed. This was at 12 months, didn't suffer any engorement. He went straight onto a cup. Was a bit miffed actually cos he didn't complain or miss it all. He seemed completely obsessed by it too! He rarely fell asleep doing it though and we mostly had a book after.

Highlander · 24/06/2006 14:11

I tried reducing length of feeds etc as suggested in the ElizabethPantley book and it just didn't work. In the end I just went cold turkey at about 16mo. I sat and cuddled DS until he went to sleep. He screamed blue murder for 30 mins the first night, 10 mins at his nap next day and for 10 mins that night. A few tears/grizzles at nap/bedtime for couple of weeks but it was definitely OK. I am very much against CC or anything like that at that age, but I felt very calm and comfortable doing this, as I was there to reassure DS.

moondog · 24/06/2006 23:04

Yes Clare,12 months is brilliant.

How exciting to be donating eggs.Have you done it before??

Original poster
ClareTheBear · 25/06/2006 21:07

No, I haven't donated eggs before. It's for a friend who had a premature menopause when she was a teenager.

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