help me decide - continue BF beyond 12mo or not?

[rattlemehearties]

DD is 11mo. I struggled at first with breastfeeding as it hurt so much but stuck with it. She has never had formula or expressed milk, just boob.

I'm surprised I got this far to be honest. Now considering whether to stop BF and give her sippy cups of cows milk instead.

Pros of giving up: my autonomy, get my body back, wear what I like again (all sounds shallow doesn't it), less self conscious in future about breastfeeding a toddler in public. Cons: unsure how to comfort DD without boob, lose the instant silencer in the morning, no physical problems meaning we need to stop, flexible working so I should be able to do morning and evening feeds even on days I'm working.

Can anyone tell me how they decided?

Does it have to be a complete stop? You could just do bf in the morning and evening, and cow's milk/water in the day?

I am feeding my 14mo old just in the evenings now, having gradually gone down to this at his pace. Occasionally he asks for feeds in the day if he's feeling under the weather or a bit unsettled. He has cow's milk in the morning as he is far too busy playing and running around to want to bf! I wear what I want as the evening feed is at home so I can just whip off anything not suited to bf. I feel that my body is my own, as I have no "side effects" any more from bf eg no leaking, no engorgement etc.

The main reason I'm continuing is to pass on immunities to him as he's at nursery a few days a week and anything that helps lessen the impact of the coughs/colds/sniffles the better. The Kellymom website has a factsheet with lots of other reasons.

Thanks for the Kellymom link exbrighton. I'm very much an all or nothing person I've come to realise! I like the idea of just feeding early morning and then evening, I don't think I want to carry on during the day.

What if I want a night away but I'm still BFing? Is that even possible?

I breastfed both my Dds until 20 months. I wanted to stop to get my life back but when it came to it I couldn't. You'll know when you are ready. Good luck

I haven't been away for an overnight yet, but I'm very fortunate in that ds sleeps through and doesn't wake for feeds in the night (this just happened on its own - I did nothing to try and make this the case!). So I reckon I could go away no problems. I think once they are happy taking cow's milk from a cup, then they will be ok with this if mum isn't around. Certainly he has been fine without a bf when he has been put to bed by grandparents/aunties etc when I've had evenings out.

I went away for the weekend twice and for a five day work trip once while still feeding DS1 - it really wasn't a problem, just brought a pump for comfort and he was happy enough on just regular food, water, and lots of yoghurt/cheese (he was never a fan of straight cow's milk, still isn't). Once baby is happy with being settled to sleep without boob occasionally it shouldn't be a problem. Your supply is pretty bomb-proof with an older baby and they're not as reliant on you for milk.

It really is up to you and what you feel comfortable with. I had planned to feed until one but now I want to carry on afterwards. I really enjoy that closeness with my child and see no reason to stop. People seem to look at it as a burden but it's not like you are feeding a newborn every 2/3 hours. It's just an extra bit of goodness for them a few times a day. Also I quite like the idea of nursing a toddler because there be a couple of times when I can just get them to sit down and shut up.

Hi, you can work it so you only feed twice a day ---- i went back to work when DS was 10mo. He refused cows milk and formula during the day with a childminder but I bf him morning and night on work days and on demand on non work days. tbh i was not sure if bf would continue. However we had a really rocky start so i just left it to fate as i was loathe to give up doing something we had worked so hard at!!.
I am proud to say that at 16mo he is still bf. Usually morning and evening only. Even on my days off he is too busy to think about bf during the day, unless he is unwell or hurt. (In fact at those times I think the magic boob is a fabulous mothering tool!)
Having only taken bf one day at a time for so long and i do now have a hope we can continue for a while longer but I have no time on it now. til 18mo maybe......?

Do what works for your little one..... We went to 2 feeds a day quite naturally because i returned to work but i did not bother with cutting down or any other fancy planning (because i am a ditherer so never got round to it!).
good luck - perhaps just see what happens and take 1 week at a time?

BTW I have been away and do go out after work. With no ill effects! (for me or DS or DH!). in fact i did a girls party weekend away which was great fun so highly recommend leaving LO with daddy and letting your hair down. DH just told me the great stuff they did together & didnt bother telling me the hard bits. Sounds like they had a lovely time together & even fitted some sleep in!!