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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

I suddenly don't want to breastfeed and just stop dead (8.5 m)

21 replies

CalmBerry · 01/09/2013 21:18

I've had 8.5 months of bliss but now I'm suddenly hating it. I want my body back, don't like the feeling. DD is obsessive at night and I want to move on. She's on bottles in the day from this week fine but wouldn't touch at night. For the first time I didn't bf before bed. I lay with her and she squealed for ages, I felt like a right cow as she rooted (she's as mobile as a 1 month old in bed).

Has anyone else had this? I'm wondering if it's just me feeling rough and if I'll regret it later. I had sore sore nipples, red and flaking, for the first problem I've ever had bf. I'm run down in general, chest infection. I just want her off. I planned to feed until she self-weaned and was very happy with our snuggly feed at night. I want to move on suddenly to the next stage now and have my body back, I feel awful though. Reckon it's illness, or not? I feel like I dislike it right now. She's a wonderful baby and I have no bad feelings towards her, I just don't want to bf suddenly.

OP posts:
Bythebeach · 01/09/2013 21:22

This happened to me when I was pregnant...are you sure you are not?

Whatever the reason...your body your choice and she knew you were there beside her even if she wanted to be bfed.

Original poster
CalmBerry · 01/09/2013 21:25

Well, I believe not and it's unlikely (no periods) but I guess POAS is the only sure answer. I hope not.

Thanks, I left alone for a bit in her cot but decided it was cruel so lay with her in bed with my hand on her. I adore her, I just want her away from my boobs...

OP posts:
ShowOfHands · 01/09/2013 21:30

You don't need your periods back to get pregnant. Have you been having unprotected sex?

I felt like this when bfing when I was pregnant and when my period was about to return both times.

It's also possible to just feel totally and utterly touched out when you're exhausted and run down. I'd get a once over from a doc to check your iron levels, consider if you're in need of more help/rest/night weaning, take a pregnancy test and try and make a considered decision. At the very least, stopping dead might be v difficult if you have an established supply. Or if you are pregnant for example and your supply has dipped, you might find that the nipple soreness and desire/ability to stop stem from this.

Original poster
CalmBerry · 01/09/2013 21:34

Twice with the withdrawral method, so bloody unlucky and unlikely but not impossible and thick after 4 kids.

I haven't fed all day and I have no fullness which is rather surprising.

OP posts:
5madthings · 01/09/2013 21:36

It could just be because you are I'll and run down or perhaps your period is about to start or you could be pregnant.

Google nursing aversion, it's very common I had it numerous times. Kellymom will have useful info.

If you want to stop and move on its your decision, but maybe read about nursing aversion as it's often short lived.

Original poster
CalmBerry · 01/09/2013 21:46

I can't seem to find the kellymom bit, googling, so far pregnancy stories...but still looking...

OP posts:
Original poster
CalmBerry · 01/09/2013 21:51

Found. There's little about it not being pregnant, but some about period.

I feel Blush but this sums it up:

'I felt like my old childhood dog who weaned her puppies by just getting up and walking off every time they tried to nurse. The feelings I had during pregnant nursing could only be described as "primal"?it was so instinctive to recoil from nursing that I really almost couldn?t help myself. I had a strong urge to pick her up and throw her off of me and run away from her. I was in no way prepared for it and I felt like the worst mother on the planet. '

OP posts:
Stripedmum · 01/09/2013 21:53

YY to being 'touched out'

Stripedmum · 01/09/2013 21:54

Wow! Isn't it strange when primal feelings come to the fore.

Stripedmum · 01/09/2013 21:55

My 22 week old daughter was conceived after one incident if unprotected sex using withdrawal method.

5madthings · 01/09/2013 21:57

Yep 'touched out' I am not breeding anymore, my kids are 14, 11, 8, 5 and 2 and i still be the 'touched out' feeling and yes to feelogn like you want it ge them away from you.

Honestly it's very normal but to does pass. It's something I found that comes ams goes.

I used to try and let my mind wander and think about soemthign else whilst feeding, anything else!

Can you get a bit of a break? Get your dh to take her out so you can have some time to yourself?

Original poster
CalmBerry · 01/09/2013 22:03

I'm happy around her completely, it's just feeding. She's a happy little thing that will play for ages alone while I mumsnet or watch her brother. She's still immobile/ can"t sit too so little need to watch! Even feeling rough she's low maintenence unlike the rest

striped mum

she was conceived in the same way, which makes me especially thick, but I was bf to....

In fact my track record:

-condoms, no split, no idea
-planned
-pill, YES taken properly
-withdrawal method after missing a pill

It wouldn't be great timing or what I planned, but it'd be loved and have to sleep in a box under the stairs as there's no room?

OP posts:
LonelyGoatherd · 01/09/2013 22:03

I felt like this before my first period post DC (also at 8.5mo). And a few weeks later, I still want to stop, but the aversion is less strong.

Original poster
CalmBerry · 01/09/2013 22:05

thanks lonely, probably the most likely but I will POAS.

Good night and thank you

OP posts:
Stripedmum · 01/09/2013 22:15

I love a withdrawal method baby. I actually still marvel at DD existing Grin. It wasn't even a close to the 'event' withdrawal. Box under stairs is fine.

Original poster
CalmBerry · 02/09/2013 21:27

Here's a giggle for you.

So I tested, just in case, bought a Lloyd's pharmacy test. Not the first I've done so ripped it open and used....PANIC, A LINE IN EACH WINDOW. Breathed deeply, panicked how to tell dh, work everything. Then luckily read the packet, unlike other tests I've done where a line in each window show pregnancy this one has a line in each to show it's working , it needs a cross in the test window to be positive.

A number of lessons learnt...

OP posts:
LalyRawr · 02/09/2013 21:33

CalmBerry I did the exact same thing the other way around.

Didn't think I was pregnant, but due to a comment from someone at work, I did a test. Line in each window, assumed negative as the only other test I had ever taken needed a cross in one window and a line in the other.

Wander into bedroom, read leaflet, only needed a line sobbed, threw pregnancy test at OH and cursed his family for four generations

Timeforabiscuit · 02/09/2013 21:39

Now you need to keep that test kit and leave it for your DH to discover ..Grin

How are feeling now ? It's horrible feeding when you're run down - the only thing I'd say is make a decision after a good meal and a decent kip if at all possible, I found that once I'd had a rare ribeye steak, a glass of red and no one touching me I got some of my reserves back.

and they can't cry with a boob in their mouth

Original poster
CalmBerry · 02/09/2013 21:42

I don't fancy having to deal with the fall out of dh finding it, rounding him up gibbering from the local forest or something.

I'm still rough, but less anti-bf. My nipples are less sore at least, though I keep coughing her awake.

I would lose my lie-ins without boob in the gob I guess. The toddler is trained to sleep until 9am at least.

OP posts:
FourLittleDudes · 02/09/2013 21:51

You have my sympathy. I was still bf ds3 when I found out I was pregnant with ds4, he was 10 months old at the time and ds4 is now 7 months. So that's ages of having my nipples chomped on, being pregnant, being climbed on etc. and ds4 bites. Its painful. I've not spent any time on my own in 7 months (single parent) and sometimes I feel desperate for just a few hours where I'm not being touched. Ds3 and 4 even sleep in my bed.

But if I stop bf then I won't get any sleep. Ds4 feeds all night like I'm a dummy (he refuses an actual dummy, and won't take a bottle) plus, I would feel mean and I love snuggling him.

But just to have a few hours of not being touched.....

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