3week old son feeding all the time

[Christelle2207]

My son is now 3.5 weeks old and I am not far off giving up bf as he is so demanding. He feeds constantly from 7am to 7pm ish, then hourly or so during the night. He will come off the breast from time to time but wants more after 5 minutes. Obviously this is exhausting for me as not able to do anything other than sit on sofa with him- really struggling with this as usually a fit and active person. Not managed to eat a single meal with two hands since he was born-luckily dh is on hand to make all meals for me and hold him when im showering/ on the loo.
The only breaks I have are when I go out in the pram which does settle him so have ended up getting my parents to take him out in pram so that I get a bit of a break but this at the most twice a week. Have also got dh to ff him last thing- this does tend to send him to sleep for 3-4 hours which just about keeps the sleep deprivation at bay. Friends' kids of same age meanwhile happily settle for a couple of hours several times a day.
I want to give up bf but holding out as I think I will regret it later.
How do I cope and when will this get better?
Btw to my dismay he has not been gaining that much weight, despite feeding, weeing and pooing lots. Now back at birth weight but only just.
Would introducing 2nd bottle of formula be a bad idea? Have managed to express v little so far, cant manage it while feeding and I have so few feeding breaks, attaching a pump to my breast during those breaks is the last thing I want. Can't carry on though the way things are.

Has he been checked for tongue tie?

I had a busy time at three weeks - perhaps, as I found, it is a growth spurt and will ease off soon? I wanted to quit bf at three weeks, but I am glad I stuck with it.

Was going to ask the same as citydweller . Have a look at this page and see if the symptoms match. for you. I had a similar experience and it is absolutely exhausting. If it helps I found 3-4 weeks the very hardest time.

Have you spoken to anyone in RL? Even just ringing a breastfeeding helpline for support and advice might help a little bit.

I agree with gunpowder, talk to someone on the bfing helpline before you make your decision, they've given me some good advice in the past and at least if you do go for ff you will feel you've given bfing every chance. Someone also told me to make decisions about swapping to formula feeding in the cold light of day, not when you are feeling low or stressed. I do think seeing someone in real life at a clinic or somewhere could really help, check for tongue tie etc. if it helps a lot of people find the 6 week point the turning point where it all gets easier. Best of luck

Thanks for these responses. That link is helpful. I am planning on going to some bf support groups this week and will also call a helpline or two. You're right, before stopping bf I need to explore as many avenues as possible so that I know giving up is the right decision, if it comes to that.
gunpowder what was your outcome and did things get better?

We had DD's tongue tie snipped at 12 weeks, so comparatively quite late, but it made a big difference to feeding for us. I was feeding her all the time before the procedure; afterwards I needed to feed her less frequently, feeding became more comfortable and DD was more settled.

Great you are seeing/speaking to someone in RL just in case it's this. Even if it's not, they might be able to suggest something as simple as a tweak to your latch or breast compressions to increase milk transfer.

I remember the evenings of eating one handed and topless well! It sounds like you are doing amazingly with him

Well done for feeding for this long! My DS is now 14 weeks but I posted something very similar when he was about 5 weeks old. It felt as though I spent my life sat on the sofa, thinking of things I could be doing if only I was more mobile! It's since got much, much better and I am so glad I stuck with it. Things that helped: making sure I was swapping to the other boob regularly enough (after 15 mins or so at that age) rather than waiting til he came off naturally. Winding baby ( my mw said bf babies didnt get wind, not true. They do get wind and dont feed properly with trapped wind) Only express if you miss a feed ( ie when your DH gives a bottle) but otherwise I found it better just to save my energy, and It means your boobs are fuller when it's feeding time so baby is more satisfied. Eat and drink as much as possible! Get DH to distract baby after feeding - he will smell your milk and just want to feed again from you straight away.
But after saying all of that you've also got to go with it for the first six weeks or so, and feeding is pretty much all you do. It does get so much easier from week7 onwards!