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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Question for tandem breastfeeding mothers

13 replies

FrogsGoWhat · 31/08/2013 21:15

I'm due DC#2 in October and DC#1 still breastfeeds to sleep. I've tried shush pat, cuddling, stories etc. Fine, she likes a good story and a cuddle but at the end of the day she still wants a breastfeed to get to sleep!

  • so the question for tandem bfeeders - when #2 arrived, was #1 still bfing to sleep? And if so, how did the evening routine pan out?

I'm a little worried there's going to be tears on all sides!

(Haven't wanted to let her cry to sleep which seems to be the only other option currently - we have also had 3 house moves in the last 6 months so I didn't want to add another disruption on as well!)

OP posts:
Goodkingwalkingslass · 31/08/2013 21:20

Following with no advice as I'm in exactly the same position with dc2 due in December. Hope some people with experience will be along soon !

HumphreyCobbler · 31/08/2013 21:23

I tandem fed but I don't think I was feeding ds to sleep. I did however feed them both at the same time in the morning. Would this not be a possibility? I quite often used to be in bed feeding both of them.

Original poster
FrogsGoWhat · 31/08/2013 21:26

So when feeding them at the same time - do you lie on your back, or what?! Confused

OP posts:
FreeButtonBee · 31/08/2013 21:27

Slightly different, but could a twin breastfeeding pillow work? I use one for feeding my twins. I feed them to sleep sitting up in bed then lift one and lie them on the mattress then sort the other one and put it in the cot and go back for the other one. You could make a fort for the lying baby with pillows etc but I normally don't bother as we have a king sized bed and I have it down to a fine art now!

Only thing is you kinda need to use the rugby ball under arm hold, not sure that cradle would work so you might need to practice before new baby arrives.

HumphreyCobbler · 31/08/2013 21:32

Oh lord, I can't really remember Blush

Think I sat up against pillows and fed rugby ball style rather than across my body. DS was 20 months so adaptable regarding position.

HumphreyCobbler · 31/08/2013 21:37

Will you be doing the bedtime routine without another adult there? If your DP is around they could take the baby who will be rather more adaptable regarding timing, you could feed the baby first downstairs and then concentrate on your toddler's bedtime.

Original poster
FrogsGoWhat · 31/08/2013 21:45

oooh replies - thank you! :)

Um twin feeding pillow - sounds like a possibility to get DC#2 sorted - DD would just wake up if I tried to re-adjust her though - part of the reason we have such problems getting her to accept anything other than feeding to sleep - I have to do a stealthy ninja roll away from her Grin

I will have DP most evenings, but not all. Hopefully DC#2 will be more amenable to DP than DD was - she really would only accept me from about day 3 (when the drugs wore off I think!). Just yelled with DP in the evenings - and still the same now really at 25 months :(

I shall start practising rugby hold - will be useful anyway as my bump is getting too big to comfortably feed around anyway.

OP posts:
Balloonist · 31/08/2013 21:46

When I did bedtime on my own( or DD2 wouldn't stay downstairs with DH) I lay on DD's bed and fed her lying down whilst DD2 fed lying on top of me. A bit trucky on a toddler bed but worked quite well.

Having stopped feeding DD1 until she fell asleep(using Pantley pull-off technique) I did then start to ask DD1 to turn over and go to sleep (once she was drowsy)to help her transition to falling asleep without the boob.

Bedtimes with two get a lot trickier once your baby is on the move.

SPBisResisting · 31/08/2013 21:47

Erm I think I stopped feeding ds to sleep when I was pregnant. I fed him then when he was looking sleepy I swid I needed the loo (usually true). When I came back hewas uusually asleep

Original poster
FrogsGoWhat · 31/08/2013 21:51

I have consistently used the Pantley pull-off for 1 year and 3 months now... Hmm most times she will roll over and go to sleep when I say so after - but this is after 30mins of breastfeeding normally - sometimes longer....

... if I try to leave before she is fully asleep she wakes up, sits bolt upright, and cries - then it takes another hour to get her to sleep :(

I suppose I'll just have to try different configurations to see what works!

OP posts:
Balloonist · 31/08/2013 22:13

Ah just remembered what I started to do when DD1 used to sense me creeping out the room and would not got to sleep in case I crept away.

I started to say "Roll over and go to sleep", kiss her and then say I was going to sort out DD2 but that I would check on her in ten minutes.

It would always go quiet and after ten minutes she was always asleep. I then realised that when you stay with them they tend to resist sleep as they worry you will go. If they know you are coming back, it allows them to relax and fall asleep. Worth a try?

LadyDowagerHatt · 01/09/2013 01:40

Hi, I can't help with the tandem feeding but we had a similar getting to sleep issue with DS and successfully fixed it before DD arrived. He used to have a bottle every night which we gave him sitting on a chair in his room then had to wait until up to 40 minutes some nights until he was sound asleep and could transfer him into his cot. I decided I couldn't spend this much time when doing bedtime on my own with two. We changed the routine to reading 2 stories in bed then kissed him goodnight and left. I said I was just going into our bedroom and would come back and check on him. The first night he cried and I went back every 2 minutes, gave him a cuddle, reassured him that I was just next door and settled him back down. This went on for 8 minutes, the next night 4 and since then he is happy to fall asleep on his own. We did this in conjunction with lots of praise about being a big clever boy plus the promise of a little toy at the end of the week if he went to sleep on his own.

I guess there was an element of crying to sleep in the above so you may feel it's not right for you, however it was for such a short time and so controlled that I felt comfortable with it (having always gone for no crying options when DS was younger, hence the feeding to sleep). The difference it has made to our bedtime routine is incredible - from 45 minutes to 10 minutes and a much happier DS and mummy!

mawbroon · 01/09/2013 02:15

There is a bigger age gap between mine, but when ds2 was born, I slept with both DSs because DS1 was still bloody well waking in the night at 4yo and I had my leg in plaster and couldn't get up to him, so he'd been in with me for a few weeks and kicking him out when a new baby arrived would not have been fair on him.

I was so bloody tired, that I would usually fall asleep first, and I'm assuming that they both nodded off at the same time, then I would feed ds2 during the night without waking so I never really knew what had gone on during the night feeding wise...

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