Hard time expressing. What to do?

[quertas]

Hi all,

I'm trying to work out what best to do about my DS and feeds. He's currently 10 weeks old and thriving away on bfing. I plan to bf until he's 6 months old as I did with my dd but for some reason I'm finding it harder to be an exclusive carer for DS than I did for DD. I really feel like I need some time to myself and I'm getting quite exhausted. The trouble is I find it very difficult to express feeds for him, partly because my experiences of using a breast pump have been under quite traumatic circumstances - after DDs birth she wouldnt feed at all and i had to pump then and ds was taken to scbu at 6 hours old with an infection so again with the pump- and partly as DS is a Velcro baby who won't be put down long enough for me to. Either way it's like trying to get blood from a stone and after 20 mns if pumping I can only usually count on 3oz of milk which I'm sure cant be enough as each feed he takes both breasts usually. Its also an experience which i actively loathe - the sound of the pump makes me anxious and edgy as it brings back feelings of terror and powerlessness fromds's birth. want to stay bing, but need to get a break fr myself. I know that the advantage of exclusively bfing has to do with gut flora, but they gave him formula in Scbu -without asking my permission- so it seems like if that's the only benefit then that boat has sailed. Can anyone tell me if there are other benefits to exclusively bing at this age or would it be ok to I've a couple of bottles of formula a week? Am I just being superstitious or is there a good reason to not? Any advice gratefully received !

Think you need to talk to a BFC on this one, have you got the helpline numbers? She should hopefully be abe to talk to you about your feelings regarding expressing and answer your questions on whether there are any benefits to exclusive bfing.

As for how much he will need, its here.

If he's a Velcro baby, can you pump while feeding?

I think the gut flora thing goes back to the exclusively breast fed sort after a couple of weeks without formula but can't remember where I read this! Could you lisren to an ipod while expressing? Have a small glass of wine to relax? I used to get more first hing in the morning when fuller. It sounds stressful for you though and perhaps you would be happier with the odd hottle of formula? There are still all the other benefits from breast milk that won't be negated by mix feeding.

Thanks Jilted and Fruit,

I can't express and feed as DS needs help maintaining a latch (ends up with boob covering his nose if I don't hold it back!). It's good to know the amounts needed though!! Wine is always good true, but I'm not sure the amount I'd need'd be good! :-). I just wish I had a better sense of the stakes. Pumping makes me horribly miserable but I really don't feel like I can go it alone much longer and formula at least buys me a break, being able to be out of the house for more than half an hour at a time!

I really would give one of the Bfing Helplines a call tomorrow. The numbers are towards the bottom of the page. The BFC will be trained in helping you to reach a decision that is right for you and right for your Lo. She will also have all the latest evidence based information, so will be abe to answer your questions more fully. Sorry I can't be of more help.

Thanks Jilted and thanks for the link.

Have you managed to speak to a BFC quertas or have you reached a decision?

Hi jilted,
No not yet. Just getting to a phone's a bit beyond me today somehow between DS and 3 year old DD the day seems to have vanished again!!!

Isn't that always the way. Have you got someone who could look afterdeck for half an hour. Know that getting DC free is the root of your problem though.

Gaa! Finally managed to get through to BFN but no joy there. I was told that 'breast is best for your baby' ( yes I know, DS is 10 weeks old and bf and dd was bf'd until she was a year old for a reason and it wasn't the overall fun quotient) but no one could answer the specific question I asked.

Getting a tad desperate here. With DD after we were released from hospital I never pumped again, but then I never left her side for longer than an hour for 6 months and was generally exhausted and neurotic, returning to work with wild relief! I literally cannot keep up that level of intensity with 2 children. I have to be able to leave him in the care of someone else for a couple of hours and soon. Surely no one else goes through this? Aargh!! (Sorry just venting now)

It is normal to feel overwhelmed and I'm sorry the BFC couldn't answer your question. Was she able to talk to you about your feelings at all? This seems like such a difficult decision for you, I don't want to influence you in any way

Can you get your oh to take out the baby for a very long walk or drive after work perhaps to give you a break? They wouldn't need feeding then. Or give youself a deadline for exclusive bf, say 3 or 4 months and then 'allow' yourself to supplement wih formula.