Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Flip

Original poster

anyone bfing a child who's about to start or has started nursery?

18 replies

flipflopson5thavenue · 15/08/2013 19:56

DS is almost 13mo and starts nursery 3 days a week from next week.

He was EBF til 6mo then BLW. He is now on three good meals a day. I don't give him scheduled snacks on top of this, mainly because I haven't quite worked out when to do them as he doesn't seem to be awake long enough to fit another meal in! But also because I bf him to sleep for his morning and afternoon naps where I assume he drinks as much milk as he wants, so really those are his two snacks.

He bf to sleep at bedtime, and wakes up 2/3 times a night and I feed him back to sleep then (this is a whole different issue for a different thread ;-))

Anyway, from next week he'll be at nursery 3 days of the week and with DP for a fourth. I'll be with him for three days a week.

My question is this - whereas I'm not too worried about him missing bf milk during the day, I know he'll just hold out for me, I wonder if I need to be substituting the milk at nursery with cows milk? He's just started taking a little bit in a sippy cup but to be honest I don't know when to offer it to him. I've given it to him with his meals, when we're out and about instead of water, and today he had some with some breadsticks for a snack. I don't think he drinks much, but he is starting to like it a bit more it seems but I couldn't say for sure that he'll happily take it as a substitute if he wants milk..

This is turning into a bit of a ramble so I'll cut it short - is DS ok to go all day without milk as I won't be with him?

OP posts:

Pachacuti · 15/08/2013 19:59

He'll be fine without if he eats well and drinks water. If you're happy for him to have cows' milk you could have it offered to him at nursery but he doesn't need it.

takeaway2 · 15/08/2013 20:04

Yes. Both my kids started at nursery when they were 6-7 months old. I bf dc1 to 2 years and dc2 to now and she's nearly 3! They held out for the boob. And when they were older had sippy cups of milk etc. they are fine!

YoniBottsBumgina · 15/08/2013 20:06

Yes he will be fine - and most likely at his age he will know that only you give milk and won't even think to ask for it - it's a bizarre thing.

He doesn't need cow's milk in the day but if he wants it then that would be fine.

Original poster

flipflopson5thavenue · 15/08/2013 20:16

thanks everyone. just nervous about him being there I guess. Not sure how they're going to get him to nap :-/ feel bad that i've created a situation where he can only nap with BM and now I won't be there for him on the days he's at nursery :-(

OP posts:

takeaway2 · 15/08/2013 20:27

Don't worry about the napping thing. Both my kids would only go to sleep with the boob. Really. They learnt to nap at nursery without the boob. Dc1 had a dummy. Dc2 didn't. I know. It seems impossible. It was also impossible that the DCs would learn to sleep without the boob at home. But they did. I now go out. Heck I travel for work - last trip was nearly a week long. And she's been fine.

Original poster

flipflopson5thavenue · 15/08/2013 20:36

thanks takeaway2. I guess there is a certain amount of herd behaviour that takes place in nursery! "I'd better do what the rest of the pack is doing else I'll get left behind"

I guess its too much to ask that DS will decide that he can do without boob at naps and during the night too and will self-nightwean and start sleeping through without effort from me and tears from him..?!?!?

OP posts:

HabitualLurker · 15/08/2013 20:38

Good luck flipflops, I'm in a really similar situation, except my DS is 11 months. He too is BFed for naps twice a day and to sleepin the evening (and a couple times at night, grr..). He's going to be going to his GPs and a childminder and I'm worried about how they'll get him to nap.

Fingers crossed for both of us..

Pachacuti · 15/08/2013 20:38

My older two would only nap at home with bf, and they were champion nappers at nursery.

One of them even self-nightweaned, so there is hope .

HabitualLurker · 15/08/2013 20:39

Pachauti do you know what they actually did at the nursery to get them to nap?

Original poster

flipflopson5thavenue · 15/08/2013 20:46

when I went to pick DS up yesterday, nap time was just starting (he hasn't had a settling in day over nap time yet) and the room was all laid out with mattresses on the floor, and all the babies were lying there swaddled in blankets like big larvae :-) A couple of the nurses where stroking backs, and patting bums etc. It all looked to peaceful! I just cannot imagine my DS in that scene. Or I can, but its sitting up crying or climbing over other other babies...

OP posts:

Pachacuti · 15/08/2013 20:55

The older babies who were still in cots they sort of jiggled the cot and stroked hair/backs, I think (I asked them when DS started, but he's 8.5 now so it's all a bit hazy). Then when they graduated to mattresses on the floor it was just a bit of stroking backs and hair and quiet dark ambience plus the fact that they'd got used to the idea that everyone went to sleep then. None of this ever worked for me at home.

Poosnu · 15/08/2013 21:01

He'll be fine re milk. My DD was exactly the same as yours - started part time nursery at 13mo still bf a few times a day. She ended up taking a little milk during the day at nursery (formula or cows milk, I don't know what they gave her then) and bf as normal in the morning, evening and on days at home. There is no need to wean in advance unless you want to.

He will soon learn to sleep at nursery! The nursery staff are so used to getting babies to sleep. He'll also end up copying everyone else - I think they just get to know what to do at nap time (plus he'll be tired). I worried about this so much, unnecessarily it turned out.

ExBrightonBell · 15/08/2013 21:04

I had the same concerns about feeding to sleep. My ds started nursery when he was 11 months, and I was still feeding to sleep for all naps. I spent most of the home visit they did apologising in advance for the trouble they would have at nap time!

However, somehow, on his first full day he slept for both morning and afternoon nap - truly astounding! I do think that there is some kind of peer pressure that encourages them. Or nursery staff have some kind of magical powers!

takeaway2 · 15/08/2013 21:05

Nothing they do at nursery works for me at home!!! But it's ok. They did survive nursery and are v happy. That's all that matters!!!

takeaway2 · 15/08/2013 21:05

Nothing they do at nursery works for me at home!!! But it's ok. They did survive nursery and are v happy. That's all that matters!!!

HabitualLurker · 17/08/2013 07:58

That a shame takeaway, I was wondering if the good habits instilled in nusery could be instilled at home! Oh well..

Refoca · 17/08/2013 08:06

My ds went to nursery when he was 12m and still feeding 7 times in a 24-hour period.

I expressed twice a day for about 5 weeks (once at home, once at work), and sent him in with 2 bottles then 1 then cows milk for about another month, then he didn't have milk in the day.

He self-weaned at 33 months, so I'm confident it didn't have a hugely detrimental effect on bf.

Good luck, sure he'll settle in just fine and go with the flow whatever you/nursery do re milk and naps.

sipper · 18/08/2013 21:48

Hi flipflops It does sound like a lovely nursery! You painted a really relaxing scene. I think I need to have a snooze there myself. It sounds like a very caring environment so hopefully whatever your DS (and you) needs or wants, they will help with. Best wishes and try not to be worried. Ask them for help and feedback as much as you want. They are there for you and your little man so will make sure it works.

Flip